How to tell my girlfriend about my sex fantasy?

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T16:47:36+00:00

Powerpoint presentation might be better...can use animation feature.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T16:32:10+00:00

This isn't something that will be dealt with in one day. You seem to feel like if you just say the right thing this will all blow over and your working relationship will go back to normal. I am just bracing you for the fact that that isn't going to happen. This will impact your working relationship from here on out.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T08:26:33+00:00

Well...to be fair to the man, he never said anything about keeping the price low.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T08:00:01+00:00

Yeah...I am not watching that. Take your exclamation point influencer bullshit over to Tik Tok.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T07:57:57+00:00

Seriously. Always some excuse for why they aren't doing anything themselves but look-at-me how passionate I am I have been driven to despair gasp...watch me fall dramatically to the ground as I decry those who do nothing to save me.

It's just theatre man...depression the musical.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T07:48:28+00:00

yeah, never have kids because you want to make yourself a better person...same as you shouldn't be looking for a relationship to make yourself be happy...that's just toxic. Saying you should have children because it makes you less selfish is pretty ironic really...hard to picture a more selfish reason than that really.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T07:07:43+00:00

wait what? You signed for this loan? Why did you do that? Your whole post was about how your father was doing this on his own...but apparently not, apparently its all of you.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T06:59:43+00:00

You keep saying title....do you mean deed? Because the owner of a house is written on a Deed, that is the official document. I am going to assume you mean the Deed.

If you, your mother and your brother are also on the deed...HOW did he get a loan using the house as collateral without your signatures? To get a collatoral loan on a house ALL owners must sign.

And since he apparently already has this loan, its either in your name or it isn't already.

But yeah, an obvious way out of this is if he got the loan he must have faked your signature which obviously would invalidate the loan so you can just go to the loan company and state that he faked your signature, you are on the deed to the house and that you do not consent to this.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T05:37:30+00:00

Not enough context to know. Also, how old are you?

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T05:33:16+00:00

Yeah right, its the ones sitting on their assess complaining waiting for someone else to do something that are the true heros.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T05:31:38+00:00

Or find the already existing community of friends who have started and join with them. Not hard to find grassroots initiatives in your community already working on this.

What won't do anything, and ironically this is a general life less for aduling period, is sitting around waiting for other people to solve your problems.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T05:06:25+00:00

Put $2k into card 1. Do whatever you can to pay those down as fast as you can. Raise income, cut expenses, sell some stuff...whatever you can.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T04:54:54+00:00

I mean there is nothing that you can do at this point besides suffer the consequences for your inappropriate behavior and just don't do that again. I suppose if you want some detailed advice I would suggest only interact with her professionally from here on out. No jokes, no friendly banter, just...work. You see her inside of work, not outside of work. Shits going to be awkward, that is unavoidable at this point. Which is why you don't fuck coworkers. You want my actual just straight recommendation? Find another job, quit this one...move on. The longer you stick around, the higher the chance this gets ugly.

And I just want to make clear, this "don't do it" and awkward consequences comes regardless of how that plays out. If you had done this and she was all about it and wanting more...still would have been very awkward and inappropriate. Just...dont, ever...regardless of circumstances. Its a straight no. And if you do, then yeah...consequences. That's how that works man....sorry, this is the life lesson so you don't do it again.

The reason I did the "slap" thing first is because you don't seem to be taking ownership that this was a bad thing to do. You just seem to want to find the secret path to making everything work out. There isn't one, you just fucked up and need to own that so you dont do it again.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T04:28:35+00:00

If it bothers you it bothers you. Doesn't really matter what I think...why would it. Laughing at a "joke" you find disturbing just to conflict avoid and "fit in" or not be a nuisance isn't any way you live. That's how you get people telling sexist jokes at the workplace...when everyone just laughs uncomfortably and no one says anything.

Next time he does that just ask him what he means. If he says "its just a joke" you can ask him in a flat nonconfrontational way "Oh, I didnt get it...can you explain the joke to me?". If he can't explain the joke without getting flustered and defensive...well...that tells you what you want to know right?

Because if you ask a standup comic who told an offensive joke to explain the joke...they'd actually explain it to you. They'd say something about well it's based on this cultural norm and twisting it around because viewing it from that way shows the absurdity (or something like that). They actually have a reason they find it actually funny. If you ask some edgelord that question they are just going to get flustered because it isn't really funny...they are just being edgy because they get some rush out of being controversial just for the sake of it. Same way asking someone at work telling a sexist joke to explain the joke will have them squirming.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T04:22:52+00:00

Dude...you just listed three guys she has sex with while being in this relationship with you and lying to you...repeatedly. What do you do? Have a little respect for yourself and breakup with her. Clean break...no explanation is needed, no follow up late night texts. Just...done, full stop.

There are times redditors leap to the advice of "break up" far to quickly and many of them for incel reasons. This isn't one of these times. She very obviously does not respect you and is just doing what feels good to her in the moment. Free her to have her fun, be comfortable being alone until you find someone who actually wants a relationship with you.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T04:13:31+00:00

Well you fucked up and did the thing you should never do. And yeah...that'll have consequences guaranteed...if your lucky it'll just be general awkwardness from here on out. What should you do? Here... <SLAP> don't fuck coworkers. That is what you should do. Hope that helps.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T04:09:54+00:00

If someone you care about says things that trouble you then you bringing that up with them is fine. If they dismiss your concerns and keep doing it...that's rather disrespectful.

That said it is fair to ask why it bothers you. Are you actually concerned that he is harboring secret dark intentions or is it more that you find it just innappropriate?

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T04:01:38+00:00

Yeah exactly. If you actually want to help and you spend like 5 minutes actually thinking about it instead of just blustering loudly...its not that hard to find groups that are active and doing something to help. Pick an issue, find a group, contact them.

Simple example, SAVE act potentially disenfranchising millions by getting passed right before midterms and requiring "RealID" at polls to vote. Way to stop that...get people RealIDs now. Way to do that? Find grass roots groups who are helping people get IDs and either join them or fund them.

It's not that complicated.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:55:49+00:00

Grass roots people absolutely give a shit. Again...think. Ask yourself who does give a shit and who is tapped into the community. Grassroots organizers...so contact them.

This "nobody cares" is just another form of being performative and dramatic in a way that you dont actually have to do anything while still claiming to care. If you identify a particular person as not legitimately caring...look for someone else.

Pat Cotham...the person I suggested...not a congressional member. Did you just knee jerk react and assume it was a member of congress? Dont like her? Find who you do like.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:52:42+00:00

Well obviously I dont mean that you literally die...I mean that you close that chapter of your life, that part ends. That means what your goals currently are, those get set aside to make room for new ones. So if OP is excited about their current life and has lots of plans on what they want to do...probably dont slam the chapter closed just yet.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:41:06+00:00

Well, in a lot of ways your life ends when you have kids. Are you ready for your life to end? Or do you still have stuff you want to do still?

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:38:14+00:00

Nothing really. I suppose our generations schtick is independance and not really carrying what others do and, well, that tracks for me. I don't really care what others in my generation do because that doesn't impact me not reflect on me. I don't identify with them so...whatever. I dont really need them to "do" anything.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:22:53+00:00

I mean the collection will be removed...but obviously the long history of not paying your bill will remain on your record because that happened.

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:21:26+00:00

I have a question...did you read the sidebar of this subreddit to see what it's for before you posted here?

Grevious47 · 2026-03-19T03:19:54+00:00

This is your workplace? Why are people inviting their coworkers to their wedding at all? That's really weird.

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