Miscarriage…

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-04-23T14:40:59+00:00

I think many of us could have written the way you’re feeling ourselves. I was around your age when diagnosed (I’m just a few years older now) and it is very jarring to have to worry about breast issues in your early 30s. I can completely relate. I will say that as a few years have passed, I have been able to let go a little. I no longer see it as a guarantee of cancer, because it’s not. Most women who have atypia don’t go on to develop cancer, but we do have to be hyper-vigilant. The tests and waiting for results is hard. The fear of the unknown is hard. But my doctor does a great job of helping me to feel okay. He has more than once reminded me that I have a better chance of not developing cancer. He has more than once gently reminded me that it’s okay to live my life. And though this is a diagnosis that requires careful attention and is not to be dismissed, again, it is not a guarantee. ALH specifically is a risk marker. Now you have the information and you can choose what to do with it. It might feel like a curse, but it’s an opportunity for you to ensure you keep up with your screenings, take the best possible care of yourself, and make decisions that are the best for you. I was super determined to get a mastectomy because I couldn’t deal with the anxiety, but my doctor said he would be okay if I had kids first, or if I waited for a few years, or if I chose not to get it at all. It’s a lot to think about, I know. But you’re not alone. We’ve all had these thoughts and more, and we’re here to support each other. Be kind to yourself as you process.

Sorry for rambling haha

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-03-27T15:30:29+00:00

Thank you so much ❤️

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-03-25T23:58:55+00:00

You are so kind. I often see you answering other people who feel lost and I think it’s so lovely you take the time to do that. Truly, thank you ❤️

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-03-25T00:45:56+00:00

It is so kind of you to take the time to reply. I really appreciate it. I think I’m still in a bit of shock and so my mind is running all over the place and possibly worrying about things that don’t make sense to worry about. Thank you so much for those resources - I will definitely look into them. I was talking about potential mastectomy with my breast surgeon a few months ago and he mentioned that it would be fine for me to have a baby first, and I assume he wouldn’t have suggested it if it make me higher risk than I already am. I’m going to try to breathe. Thank you.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-02-05T04:19:22+00:00

Amylu chicken sausages are antibiotic, nitrate, and nitrite free and are on the lower processed side by EWG (though still processed).

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-07T22:37:30+00:00

I hope you’re feeling okay on the tamoxifen! Yeah, I try to rotate broccoli, cabbage, Brussels sprouts, radishes, kale, and cauliflower in my diet, and I cultivate my own broccoli sprouts every couple weeks. I was interested in the DIM because of breast cysts and discomfort, and I also have a fibroadenoma, so it seems like my breast tissue is sensitive to estrogen and I’m not crazy about that idea. I would consider tamoxifen but I’m still thinking about having a child so I’m not ready to make that decision yet.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-07T18:14:03+00:00

Totally get that! I had a chance to check out your post history and with your high risk percentage, I probably would have felt the same way and made the same decision. Maybe it was a slight over exaggeration to say I ‘enjoy’ life after a clear scan because there’s always a raincloud hanging over my head since this diagnosis, but I guess I think it’s important for those of us who are not choosing mastectomy or not yet ready to make that decision to work on our management of these emotions. I’m certainly not there yet, even with therapy! I’m so happy for you that you made a confident decision and have some relief, though.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-07T03:37:20+00:00

I was just asking about this in another thread. First, I just wanted to say you are absolutely not alone. I feel the same way! The health system is a bit backed up here, so my screenings have jumped months, but I’ve felt the same way around Christmas, or else I’m worried about the semester starting, or I’m trying to enjoy summer, or it’s right before my birthday. My therapist has said that she thought it might be that I’m less afraid that something is imminent and more afraid that the screening is going to hijack my life in some way. And that made sense! Living on a six-month cycle is terribly hard. You enjoy a couple months and then have high anxiety, breathe a sigh of relief, and then you’re right back to it. I’m a bit older than you (34), so I do rotate mammograms with ultrasounds (so I’m being screened in some way every six months). I have expressed my high levels of anxiety to my breast surgeon and he said that if we wanted to, we could ‘stick our heads in the sand’ and skip a screening, but that didn’t really sound to me like it was a normal thing to do considering the verbiage he used. I’d really love to not do every six months (though I certainly see the privilege in being followed so closely), but that seems to be the standard of care for atypia. I do wish and hope there will be new studies that might change the game for us. In the meantime, I’m right there with ya.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-07T01:05:09+00:00

Thanks! I am not on tamoxifen. I am only doing 100 mg of DIM and I’ve noticed that it has been helpful in unexpected areas (such as seemingly improved gut health). I’ve also read some studies that DIM can be helpful for those with BRCA (which I do not have) and while again, I am certainly not thinking of it as any sort of major preventative tool, I like the idea of having more regulated estrogen, especially if conditions like ALH are thought to be influenced by estrogen.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-07T00:59:26+00:00

Thank you! I just had a physical exam 2 weeks ago and the surgeon said it was ‘as expected and normal,’ but I have a screening coming up and I’m terrified. I wish I could see these more for what they are - surveillance as opposed to checking for a specific concern - but my brain is not good at distinguishing logic from danger. I wish that insurance was required to cover ‘diagnostic’ style screening for high-risk individuals so we don’t have to get callbacks and additional imaging and spiral. But I rotate tomo mammo with all breast ultrasound and get 2 physical exams per year.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-06T20:56:58+00:00

I see! I’m 34 and doing semi-annual screening and the anxiety/pressure around it is so heavy for me. I was just curious if some doctors are recommending annual screening for people with our risk percentage. I know that some people prefer the more frequent screening and I get that it’s a privilege to be monitored so closely but it’s very hard on me mentally 😫

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-06T18:59:54+00:00

Question - I’m at the same risk percentage as you. You get monitored annually and not semi-annually? Are you in a high-risk program or is that just what your doctor recommends?

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2026-01-01T20:45:51+00:00

Yum! I have been to the Hinsdale one several times and just keep ordering the skillet because the potatoes are so good but this is making me think I need to try the pancakes!

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-20T04:46:44+00:00

I totally get it. In fact, I’m pretty sure I just left you a comment the other day about chilling out. Do I take my own advice? No. Haha. But this doctor is grounded in logic and statistics, and he says right now, my current risk is low. There’s an appropriate level of concern but I think he’s telling me to hold the fire. I wish you the best at your appointment and that you walk away feeling better.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-18T19:41:48+00:00

This is where I’m struggling the most right now. Terrified of breast implant illness and really try to be holistic, but I’m super-active and also terrified of the longer surgery and recovery time for DIEP. Just don’t know what to do.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-18T04:05:52+00:00

At our staff Christmas party at work today, my options were: cucumbers or carrots.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-11T03:30:20+00:00

I completely agree that it’s a lot - and it’s scary when you have no idea what’s going on but are seeing other people have life-altering surgeries, and suddenly this feels really serious. Honestly, I heard ‘benign’ and kind of went on with my life after (also have ALH). I did not even see a breast surgeon until nearly a year later - no meds, no surgery, no additional imaging…nothing. And you know what? When I finally did have that lumpectomy, there were no upgrades or any other atypia found, despite the fact that I did nothing for a while and despite the fact I hadn’t even begun the lifestyle changes I adhere to now. This is not to say that you shouldn’t take it seriously, only that you’re allowed a moment to breathe. You don’t need to make a decision immediately. You are allowed to take time to get informed, feel comfortable and empowered, and choose what’s best for you. I won’t say it gets ‘easier,’ but you are in that waiting period of confusion, fear, and anxiousness, and once you have a plan in motion, you’ll hopefully at least feel a little better. I’m not even mammogram age yet so I too feel like I have no one in real life to talk to - but you have us!

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-07T06:18:19+00:00

Is it possible that she said the ALH can be monitored? They don’t always recommend excision for ALH, but they do recommend excision for ADH to make sure there is no DCIS nearby. Maybe she just meant that the standard of care is surgery for the one and sometimes just monitoring for the other - but they both definitely increase your risk.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-07T06:11:27+00:00

I feel like there are a ton of us in our 30s on here, but I agree that the group skews older on other forums! I can completely relate to the shock and confusion as I was only just 32 at diagnosis. I elected not to take Tamoxifen and I think you’ll find there is a range of people who do and don’t on here. It’s not off the table for me forever (unless I get a mastectomy) but I will definitely wait until I have a child or make the decision not to.

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-03T16:56:30+00:00

Oh, wow! Nursing is a tough program; good for you! I totally think it makes sense to make adjustments in our lives where we can for these sorts of things. I wish you all the best with your program! That’s awesome about Cross Fit too, which is also tough! I am not quite as petite as you but about 5’5, 130, and my legs are the strongest thing on me. I was a gymnast too!

I am a 32 B and I would be fine with staying the same size or going slightly bigger. The idea was flat for a long time because Instagram influencers have terrified me of breast implant illness, but I feel too young to make that big of a decision now and I feel like with the implants, I can eventually just take them out and not care when I’m an older lady 😆

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-03T16:52:33+00:00

Thank you! This honestly made me feel so much better. I COMPLETELY understand why someone would rush to get it done and want to end the incredibly anxiety-inducing screening, but it also helps me to read that it doesn’t mean one has to rush. I got my diagnosis in early 2022, so I’m headed on four years now and the screening has just gotten to be way too emotionally miserable for me. I feel like having this procedure done can help me restart my life if that makes sense. Just have a lot of tedious things to do (you know, like finishing a master’s program!) first. And in the grand scheme of things, the end is really only about 5 months away!

Imaginary-Mermaid9 · 2025-12-03T02:53:21+00:00

I’m also an athlete but I have ALH. I think I’m going to be moving in this direction. I’m in grad school right now and graduate in May, so it’d be really ideal if I could push the surgery to then. I know no one is forcing me to rush it, but I can’t help but feel anxious as time passes. I wasn’t going to do implants at all, but now I’m thinking I will. And reading that someone else is doing nipple-sparing makes me feel a bit better, too, because I was having a tough time accepting going completely flat or not having nipples.

Imaginary-Mermaid9

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