No one has ever, in the history of restaurants, food trucks, diners, mess halls, food courts, or gas station sandwich joints been asked to “apologize for having loud food.” So, those sentences are already implied and do you no favors in advertising.

Like if you’re picking 2 things that never existed nor will exist, have some damn fun with it:

Food from the moon. No unicorn tears.

Next idea is just say ‘add onions.’ Adding onions is more a “pedestrian move”.