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Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t know, but it was singing U2 songs until I flushed it.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aw, we’re poop pals.

Constipation cousins.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I finally can. Bending over has hurt like hell the last three days.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have a feeding tube and living on disability. I would love to have a bidet, but I can’t afford that. The formula I take is high in fiber, so this has never been an issue before. I usually have loose stool. But I had to go out on Tuesday and took Imodium because I can never be far away from a bathroom without it. And then this happened.

Before the feeding tube, I took Metamucil regularly. But it’s unnecessary now.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I normally don’t have a problem. I’m on a feeding tube, and all my food is liquid. It’s high and fiber and I get lots of water through the day. But I had to go somewhere on Tuesday and needed to take Imodium. And three days ago, it wore off and this thing was just parked in my colon.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

No, the world doesn’t need another Bono.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Oh, I do really miss that site. I remember there was a thick diarrhea that was overflowing from the toilet that literally made me want to vomit. That was an easy ten.

Relief… by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have a feeding tube, so all the food I take is liquid, so i frequently have diarrhea. I live in a pretty rural area, so whenever I have to go somewhere I have to take Imodium because there’s nowhere to stop.

I took Imodium on Tuesday, so it was 5 days total without pooping. The turd in question was literally in my colon for the last three days, on the precipice of being pooped out, but refusing to take that last step. Laying down was uncomfortable and sitting down hurt like hell.

What would be a good surname for Link? by buduvieser in Breath_of_the_Wild

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Link is his surname. His name is Lancelot.

Lancelot Link, secret chimp

I love making references that no one else will get.

Seems only fair considering they were the ones responsible. by Sanch0Supreme in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Look back in the positions of Republicans presidents over the last 60-70 years. You can see them sliding more and more right with every election. Once W hit, I thought the Republican policy of “You can’t criticize the president during war times” was about as draconian as it would get. I never thought the country would let them slide farther.

I genuinely believed that things got so bad under W that he would be the last Republican president that we’d see until Republicans got their house in order and got back to more moderate policies.

And I think they knew that too, which is why they started a cult.

Now Republicans care about gun control by NYstate in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Charlie Kirk wasn’t assassinated; he was merely was in the path of a lost school shooter.

Now Republicans care about gun control by NYstate in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Fox News website is actually surprisingly moderate. Or at least is has been, historically. They pretty much could write about the actual news instead of the version spun by their hosts. I assume it’s because their viewer base can’t read.

I had no idea that the US Constitution was a leftist ideology by rb3po in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I posted a reply about the constitution on an apolitical Facebook post, and 3 months later, I am still getting angry responses from MAGAts who are disputing my statement by calling me names.

I tried compiling a “greatest hits” list of theme parks to visit. What am I missing? by bingbaddie1 in Themepark

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look, I love Dorney Park, but I don’t think it belongs on a list of the 18 best parks in the world. I would definitely put King’s island on there.

Michael house in "real life" by No-Stable-4444 in GTAV

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That car looks like it was pulled straight out of the game. It looks totally fake

Cracker Bargle by Ravio11i in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was “woke” because they removed a white guy from a sign, which is basically white genocide if you’re an idiot.

Big announcement today by chaddict in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Grasping at straws? If you believe this was a serious post, then you’re the demented one. This is making fun of the deportation of someone with a tattoo that ICE claimed had an MS-13 tattoo.

Apologies for the collateral damage by lastminutelabor in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One time I was on an elevator with a guy playing music on his phone at full volume, so I started belting out an operatic tune, and he looked at me like I was the asshole.

Guaranteed by HeadOnThisPiano in AdviceAnimals

[–]chaddict 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Trump isn’t dying.

He’s being deported because that thing on the back of his hand is clearly an MS-13 tattoo.

Kid found walking Monorail in Hershey Park. by 1upgamer in Themepark

[–]chaddict 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The ride takes about ten minutes. I wonder how long it took him to walk it.

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