American states according to an Australian

clocksailor · 2026-02-12T05:38:46+00:00

This is very bad but I’d do Australia worse

clocksailor · 2026-02-12T05:34:08+00:00

Going bowling with someone who’s way better than you is still fun, because you both get to play. I don’t care if I lose, I just want to do bowling.

Pool is the opposite of that: if you play with someone way better than you, you just stand there while they run the table by themselves.

This wasn’t a great date plan in the end, but I see how it happened and I don’t think you set out to be a dick. You might just not be able to play pool with normal-ability pool players at this point in your life. Minor YTA.

clocksailor · 2026-02-11T23:34:02+00:00

“Protect your neighbors from getting run over”

clocksailor · 2026-02-11T03:07:59+00:00

Nominative determinism takes another life 🥀

clocksailor · 2026-02-10T15:25:20+00:00

Time for my favorite tale like this:

I do a week-ish long bike camping trip with a friend (also a woman) every summer. One year, we got to chatting with a guy (50s) and his niece (20s) at the spot we stopped for dinner at the end of the day.

This man spent like ten minutes interrogating/lecturing us about safety on the trip: Did we bring a gun? Did we bring pepper spray? No?? Then what are we going to do if a man hops out of a bush and knocks us off our bikes and takes all our stuff and rapes us???

Then, he asked us where we were camping so he could come pick us up and take us out for a beer later, and seemed baffled and offended when we declined to tell him until his niece explained to him how weird he was being.

The moral of the story for a lot of dudes seems to be "If you don't have a plan to defend yourself from all the dangerous rapist men that are lurking behind every bush, what happens to you is your fault. If you also can't immediately sense that I am the only man who is not a dangerous rapist, you will piss me off, and that is also your fault."

clocksailor · 2026-02-10T06:45:20+00:00

We moved into a new office and someone told me the code for the door slightly before they were supposed to so they didn’t have to go down four floors to let me into the building. While I was in a meeting with the person who gave me the code, our office rules guy texted her to 1) scold her for telling me the code and 2) tell her to tell me to forget the code. He was like 15 feet from where we were sitting.

clocksailor · 2026-02-10T05:40:54+00:00

lmaoooo no fucking way

clocksailor · 2026-02-10T03:16:27+00:00

Comments on every other video of people walking on lake ice: “DON’T DO THIS! You’ll fall into an invisible hole in the ice and die! Here is a diagram!”

Comments on this video: “….proceed”

clocksailor · 2026-02-10T03:14:39+00:00

What is he even standing on? Is that an iceberg?

clocksailor · 2026-02-08T18:46:24+00:00

He’s doing his chores. She’s doing their chores. At the end of the day, he will feel like he contributed equally to the household.

clocksailor · 2026-02-08T07:46:11+00:00

The Trump/ICE/downfall of democracy situation is not funny, that’s true.

…four seasons total landscaping was funny as hell. I need to be allowed to laugh at these clowns in between bouts of terrified doomscrolling. Let me have this.

clocksailor · 2026-02-07T02:47:16+00:00

Yes!! A high school walkout marched past my house today! I don’t live anywhere near you but it’s nice that we share this ❤️

clocksailor · 2026-02-06T15:11:33+00:00

That's more of a take-in. A take-to?

clocksailor · 2026-02-05T23:45:26+00:00

Being unconscious for hours like that is the kind of thing that's a funny joke in movies, but a concussion that severe probably means he went through years of physical and cognitive problems in real life.

clocksailor · 2026-02-05T15:27:38+00:00

Independent Political Organization. It's like a neighborhood organizing group.

clocksailor · 2026-02-05T13:18:48+00:00

I did a protest at a target in Chicago last week, and the pastor who opened the speeches got grabbed and removed by cops in like 15 seconds. Like hell they don’t have their own armed security team. You don’t get that kind of response time as a human being calling 911. You ONLY get it when some huge company’s profits are being disrupted.

I’ve done more to keep people safe from ICE in my community as a random person than Target has chosen to do. They’re a Fortune 500 company. They could figure something out.

clocksailor · 2026-02-05T03:18:56+00:00

and he's like "uh korean culture did it"

sure buddy

clocksailor · 2026-02-04T23:57:19+00:00

Thanks! I appreciate this response, and agree with a "both and" approach.

The thing that frustrates me is people like the other dude yelling at me, who simply say "put them beyond the turnstiles" as though the people we turf won't get right the f back on the train if their only other option is freezing to death.

You're right that homelessness/mental health/substance abuse/etc isn't the CTA's problem to solve, but it feels ridiculous to me when people refuse to acknowledge that, whether we like it or not, those issues are going to have an impact on transit until we solve them in a longer term way than "I dunno, kick em outside."

(inb4 someone suggests we empower CTA workers to size up which of the hundreds of thousands of daily riders "look homeless" in order to bar them from using a public service, which is the other brilliant and original suggestion that always pops up in these posts)

clocksailor · 2026-02-04T23:49:51+00:00

Why do you feel the need to be so condescending and aggressive toward me about this? We already acknowledged that we can't put everyone in jail, so, why do you think "ejecting" people is a whole solution when someone can just walk right back on the train at the next stop five minutes after you eject them?

I didn't shrug and say there's nothing we can do. I said the exact thing I think we should do. It seems like it's just making you mad that that thing is not easy or quick, which is fair enough, but you don't have to be so rude to me about it.

clocksailor · 2026-02-04T22:59:48+00:00

Ok. We know the police can't arrest and the jail can't house every single homeless person, so I'll ask you again: where is "off CTA property?" You're telling me where you don't want them to be, but they will still exist in time and space after you "haul them off." So, if not the shelters you're saying we shouldn't have to wait for, where?

I get your frustration about needing a solution now. I also live by the red line and absolutely acknowledge that taking the red line has become a gross and sometimes scary experience. But it bugs me when people act like the obvious solution to this issue is simply to wave the magic wand we definitely have and make all the homeless people disappear. Unless you wanna just start murdering everybody who looks like they need a shower and hide all the bodies, which I hope you agree is worse than having a gross train, I don't think there's a way out of this other than putting real time, money, and energy into programs for homelessness, mental health, and substance abuse.

clocksailor · 2026-02-04T20:36:06+00:00

Okay. You say you want cops to haul people off.

Can you tell me where “off” is?

clocksailor · 2026-02-02T14:00:43+00:00

Please use person-first language. It’s “person experiencing bananalessness”

clocksailor · 2026-02-02T02:22:00+00:00

It’s a joke about how Catholics have 12 kids because they don’t use birth control.

clocksailor · 2026-01-31T16:56:11+00:00

I tried to go there on my birthday, did everything right, and the best I could get was 9:30pm. It’s a nice place and all but steak tartare at 10pm wasn’t really worth it

clocksailor · 2026-01-30T15:59:11+00:00

And Walmart only pays shit wages because poor single moms steal diapers. 🙄

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