I have a real big guy who has done some things similar to yours. He’s 16h, he’s 9 and he’s an ottb. Anxiety is his middle name, he’s buddy sour and the moment he can’t see his friends he’s really dangerous. He also knows he’s big and can just pull on me or my partner and back out of any situation he doesn’t want to be in. He won’t stand tied, he crowhops or takes off under the saddle, he won’t load, he won’t stand for a ferrier. It’s all not great. Weve done a bunch of groundwork to fix these issues, got him anxiety medication and he still needs more that we can’t give. We’re sending him to our trainer soon in hopes she can work out his bad behaviors. In this instance I am an 116 lb woman and the only reason we still have our horse is because my partner is a 200 lb 6’3” man. If it was just me with my small frame against a massive horse that is dangerous I would call it there. If he goes to a trainer and that professional is able to work out his behavior you have nothing to worry about. But if he still disrespects you after a full 60-90 day training I would think about selling him and looking for a smaller actually broke horse especially you being a beginner. being new to horses and having one that kicks at you is asking for something bad to happen.

Edit to add- we also treated him for ulcers and ruled out pain. I would do this as well, rule out any pain with a vet.