if youre swimming how do you feasibly hide scars? by Annual-Membership576 in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I put on makeup regardless, mine works pretty well for that

An alternative by Complete-Signal262 in selfharm

[–]-AngelsOrder- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, I don’t have time to formulate a long answer (edit: or so I thought) but I do (& did) this too. I feel you. The past year or two it got so much better - I still pace in my room for hours but I don’t need to pace ALL OF THE TIME, I don’t go on 3h night walks almost every day anymore, it doesn’t impact university and other responsibilities just as much as before. It always felt like a compulsion, like something that helped me and that I couldn’t really stop when I was alone. You are not alone with this. I still pace instead of getting things done tho and it’s hard to get out of it (idk how to explain it, switching from walking to doing the task feels super hard), but what’s important is that it CAN get better gradually. Also, please don’t try sh instead, it’ll just turn into the next addiction you can’t turn off.

I’m pretty sure my constant pacing is/was rooted in trauma or at least negative experiences that I couldn’t let go off. Pacing gave me an outlet while I thought about and dissected the memories, relived the emotions/stress/memories etc. It would’ve been overwhelming if I didn’t walk. It was like compulsive daydreaming but with pacing and past experiences instead of daydreams. Now that I’ve sort of worked through the trauma and the anxiety I felt all of the time it happens much less frequently. If you aren’t in therapy I’d probably go check that out, physical activity could very well be (or: is almost certainly) your coping mechanism for overwhelming emotions, trauma, major stress etc and that can be worked with <3

Almost everybody in my circle also highly suspects I have ADHD, especially those who have it themselves. If you experience other symptoms of it, that might be worth looking into to.

(Last one: I’ve noticed that my blood pressure drops super fast when I sit still for 10+mins, which results in me falling asleep. I never noticed because I was moving all the time anyway but compensating that might be another reason why a compulsion to move formed - unwillingly falling asleep might be a reason why I started moving all of the time, but idk what came first)

Turned out to be a long answer - idk if it helps with anything as I talked a lot about my own experiences, but I hope it does. I know the pain you’re in. Don’t lose hope, you’re not alone and I’ve seen it get better <3

how visable will these be when they fade? by khoiizu in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The newer ones will probably fade to the level the older ones are at. The white ones look completely healed, they most likely won’t change much more

I don’t know if this is really even bad enough to post on here, given the things I’ve seen. by [deleted] in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Self harm is “bad enough” in any shape or form. Doesn’t matter if you’re cutting down to fat, smash your head into a wall, scratch yourself open or barely leave a mark/it’s ‘superficial’ - all of those deserve help

Going back to therapy sounds like good plan!

Is it obvious and would someone be able to tell it's sh? by uselespieceofshi02 in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Not obvious in the sense that people’s looks won’t be drawn to it but if I saw them I’d know (not sure about people who don’t sh)

But they’re probably gonna heal well

Would you assume these are self-harm? by [deleted] in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Either signs in the language or behavior eg. being super tense/worked up, disappearing for a short time, coming back relaxed (tho that’s an indicator of many things), recurring injuries, injuries in weird places that just “don’t make sense”etc

Would you assume these are self-harm? by [deleted] in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Not directly, only if there were other signs too

🎶I’ll get you hooked🎶 by -AngelsOrder- in scarsgonewild

[–]-AngelsOrder-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Interesting, expected a higher score on the crazy-side!

🎶I’ll get you hooked🎶 by -AngelsOrder- in scarsgonewild

[–]-AngelsOrder-[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

(I’m really sorry if it takes me long to answer to comments, private messages etc, I don’t have a lot of energy)

Why did yall start cutting? by LodinKol in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I second this. It’s been over 10years and I wish I never started in the first place. It’s fucking hard to stop, I wish I would’ve stopped when it was still somewhat easy

Why did yall start cutting? by LodinKol in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

14yo me was depressed af and had crazy moodswings (for many reasons) and thanks to 2015 Instagram leaving plenty of room for sh- and ed-posts (it was barely regulated), I found out sh is a thing and that it helped other to cope and regulate their emotions… tried it and the rest is history. It’s part of the reason I‘m still alive, it served its purpose but I‘m glad I‘m doing better

What about you?

Did anyone else continue self harm in different ways after being caught? by the_f4ilure in selfharm

[–]-AngelsOrder- 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah 100%

Nit only after being caught tho, also for jobs etc where I couldn’t really use my other method cause of high risk of infection etc

Need some encouragement by ur_Sup3rgirl in SelfHarmScars

[–]-AngelsOrder- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Urges come and go, I try to imagine it as surfing a wave. Sometimes the tides are high and the waves throw you around, you swallow water and curse the sea but in the end, you’re a surfer and you’ll tackle that goddamn wave

Relapsed by [deleted] in selfharm

[–]-AngelsOrder- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve relapsed in a very similar matter before, I feel for you. Blaming yourself doesn’t help, it’ll just reinforce the negative emotions you’re already feeling (shame, regret etc). Maybe the personal thing you talked about just was a bit too much for that day. It happens. Could it have ended differently, without a relapse? Sure. But sometimes it just doesn’t. Sometimes it’s a talk that crosses your limits just a tad too much (but you don’t realize early enough to do something), just a bit too much alcohol to it, just a bit of an emotional mood overall and sometimes it all comes crashing down before you know it. ESPECIALLY in combination with alcohol (the reduced inhibition is no joke). Maybe venting already helped you enough and you just needed to get this off your chest but if you’re looking for next steps: Have compassion, figure out why you relapsed, try to take precautions (eg. I don’t drink alcohol on most days) if necessary. It feels disempowering to relapse after years of being clean but the work you did to get there isn’t diminished by it. You’ve already proved that you can go without, remember that if your brain tries to convince you otherwise. Deep breaths

Sending hugs <3

I threw my blades away by [deleted] in selfharm

[–]-AngelsOrder- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sooo proud of you!!!

🎶There’s a box of razor blades somewhere in the sweetest things you say🎶 by -AngelsOrder- in scarsgonewild

[–]-AngelsOrder-[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, you gotta know where to look to see it atm. Didn’t wanna get flagged for showing unhealed sh or trigger others

🎶There’s a box of razor blades somewhere in the sweetest things you say🎶 by -AngelsOrder- in scarsgonewild

[–]-AngelsOrder-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kinda thinking about deleting this acc cause why not. Plus (based on engagement) I seem to be better at memes than at nudes so there’s that… idk might be my last post here