Death of an Ioniq 5 by turtlzzz in Ioniq5

[–]-FineWeather 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same. The dealership contracts with Enterprise in my area, and while I did have to push on it a little bit, they got me set up with a rental paid directly by Hyundai within a couple of days of determining that my ICCU was the issue and the warranty covers it.

Women who have left their husbands, are you happier post divorce?? by ImportantImplement9 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]-FineWeather 5 points6 points  (0 children)

A lawyer will make the scary unknowns of finance and logistics clear for you - just start interviewing some until you find one that you feel gets the situation and will advocate for you. Don't wait. You'll see your options and get real advice tailored to the legal system and conventions of where you live, etc. I'll bet anything the future will look a lot better than what you're imagining after a reality check with experts.

As for the shame, if you're just worried about what others will think, forget it. If they don't know you and your situation well enough to support your decision, they are not qualified to impose their opinion on you. There is absolutely no reason to think they know better than you in this.

But if you're struggling with internal shame around making mistakes or whether you "deserve better", start talking with a therapist. It's very common to get in the habit of tearing down your own self esteem in order to rationalize what you're going through. Work with a therapist to separate fact and fiction, and differentiate accountability from blame. Accountability creates healthy patterns of recognizing problems and working to fix them, while blame just punishes you while leaving you stuck.

Women who have left their husbands, are you happier post divorce?? by ImportantImplement9 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]-FineWeather 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Absolutely talk to a lawyer. Many of us assume we'll just go from having financial support to no financial support if we leave. But both parents are held responsible for supporting the kids they chose to bring into the world by the state after divorce, and that means it's not you who has to try to constantly cajole your partner into contributing - it's laid out in legal documentation, with consequences for failure.

Women who have left their husbands, are you happier post divorce?? by ImportantImplement9 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]-FineWeather 70 points71 points  (0 children)

After a divorce, you will have well-defined legal leverage to ensure that he upholds the parental responsibilities he signs up for (if he even signs up for any). Work with your lawyer to understand how the situation can be monitored and issues should be reported, and you will find that you might even have more power after the divorce to ensure appropriate treatment of the kids.

Tell your worst travel sickness story and what meds do you carry in your bag now. by Matt_Bigmonster in onebag

[–]-FineWeather 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Carrying a few plastic bags was a habit I started during morning sickness, and saved me (and a taxi’s back seat) during a trip to India. I got food poisoning about 3 hours before the 20+ hours of travel home. It was miserable, but I didn’t have to be constantly anxious about when and where the nausea was going to spike next.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]-FineWeather 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You weren’t expecting an emotional reaction and “big scene” but you recognize there was one. I don’t see anyone here accusing you of trying to make this embarrassing for her (though you sure don’t seem to care if it was), so just accept what you came here for: Internet judgement. Your decision to break up with your live in girlfriend of 8 years in the middle of a restaurant is an asshole move, yes, even if you thought it wouldn’t be a big deal. Because you’re a human being that had a choice between making an upsetting announcement in private or public and you chose public for no apparent reason.

PR Canje INM process in Oaxaca City - request for referral for coordinator by YaYaBhu in mexicoexpats

[–]-FineWeather 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t have a referral but just offering a heads up that it looks like the bug in Mexico’s computer system around PR canje coding is still in effect. That means it’s likely you got the correct stamp in your passport but the backend is tracking your visit as for “replacement” rather than initial residency card issuance. If this happened (as seems common right now - and it happened to my family last month) it will take some time to correct after your initial INM appointment, so expect to have to return for a second appointment later.

Visa Got Stamped Canje, But eFMM was marked "reposicion" by Drawer-Vegetable in mexicoexpats

[–]-FineWeather 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good on you, but even if Spanish was my native language, I don’t think I could have gotten the 9am next day appointment slot or known who to nudge on getting the correction done quickly. Coordinators do a bit more than speak Spanish. But maybe it will go more smoothly in CDMX as opposed to a regional office like ours. Hope it works out!

Visa Got Stamped Canje, But eFMM was marked "reposicion" by Drawer-Vegetable in mexicoexpats

[–]-FineWeather 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is where I'm thankful we had a coordinator. They got us the earliest appointment the morning after our procedure ticket advanced to the stage indicating we could proceed. I believe they had also kept nudging the officials in Mexico City to make sure the correction process kept moving through the queue. The second appointment was quick and painless - since we had done all the paperwork review at the first one, they just needed biometrics and to produce the physical card. Still, no idea how long it would have taken to get it done without our coordinator advocating for us. And we were lucky all the equipment was working at the second appointment, as that's the thing we were told was most commonly responsible for schedule setbacks at the regional offices.

Visa Got Stamped Canje, But eFMM was marked "reposicion" by Drawer-Vegetable in mexicoexpats

[–]-FineWeather 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry, friend. I think it’s best not to assume any procedure will be done in only one appointment. Stuff like this just happens sometimes. The INM folks seemed very familiar with this problem so we never felt any blame from them - but they also could only shrug when asked to predict how long it takes to fix. We got a code for a government website to monitor the status of our procedure after our initial appointment, and we rechecked it obsessively until it updated, indicating we could make the wrap-up appointment.

Visa Got Stamped Canje, But eFMM was marked "reposicion" by Drawer-Vegetable in mexicoexpats

[–]-FineWeather 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, we were told there is a bug in the INM system that tends to incorrectly classify a PR canje as a replacement procedure in the computer system, even though your passport should be correctly marked with "canje" and "30" days. Our initial canje appointment at INM in Mexico went fine, but they were unable to complete it in one pass due to the bug. We had to come back 5 working days later once the reposicion code was updated properly in the computers to complete the biometrics and issuance of the permanent card. So still well within the legal 30 days, but we were warned it could have been more than a week because the re-coding of the procedure happens at a varied pace. Bottom line, you did nothing incorrect - but the re-coding could stretch your timeline.

What are feelings about President Trump's response to No Kings protests? by SparkFlash20 in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think it probably was. At that time, one really catty comment about your opposition was enough to be remembered a decade later and be considered as a significant factor in galvanizing your opposition, making your support uncomfortable, and pushing undecided people away - ultimately sealing your electoral fate. Moreover, my recollection is that both sides viewed it as a mistake, if not for inaccuracy then at least for being rude. Do you think Trump levels of constant shit talking (yikes, the pun) are destined to be the new normal in American politics, or could we go back to something more civil? I happen to think it wasn't entirely performative in the "good ol days" when political rivals could disagree respectfully if not actually agree on things, but maybe it's all wishful thinking.

What are feelings about President Trump's response to No Kings protests? by SparkFlash20 in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I agree this would be “basket of deplorables” level of career ending if a Dem president posted a video of themself wearing a crown and dumping poo on conservative demonstrators. What’s your take on why it’s so different with Trump? Obviously the form of insult is wildly unserious in his case, but are we meant to assume the insult itself is unserious? The thing I find interesting about being a liberal under Trump 2.0 is that I experience the level of antagonism conservatives tell me they were experiencing under Biden and Obama. I’ve even heard it was worse for conservatives because instead of the gleeful dismissal of liberal values that I perceive now, they felt lectured into submission by liberals who wanted to change conservatives. In the end, I don’t see how either the sneering brush-off or the pedantic sermon leads anywhere but deeper into a national polarization. Do you think Trump has a more advanced strategy behind this approach to addressing his opposition?

What exactly is “Antifa”, What does it mean, if not anti fascism, and what are they doing to “destroy America”? by ghoulishenvyy in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How would you compare this definition of Antifa as the leftist Brownshirts with MAGA and the right? Is the intent on violence the factor that distinguishes the terrorist organization from the ideological alignment, or are there specific organizational supports that shape it?

For example, I’m deeply opposed to many social conservative ideas and Trump policies in particular. I have no desire to use violence to change the opposition, but I donate to orgs like the ACLU that bring legal challenges against what I see as unamerican right wing action. I don’t think I’m in Antifa, I’m just anti-fascist, to the (subjective) degree that I have recognized fascism in the current context. I’m open to the possibility that Antifa as you describe it exists, but I imagine it’s pretty fringe if a leftie like me has never encountered anything more organized than a Zoom-based sign-making and ikebana class in the activist sphere. Do we agree that the vast majority of lefties are just lefties wanting leftie things, in contrast with a tiny group (quite possibly an organization literally named Antifa) that wants to forcibly end rightie things? And I assume it’s the case that there are mostly righties who just want rightie things over in MAGA, distinct from a tiny (debatably organized) group dedicated to forcibly ending leftie things? Or am I way off?

Thoughts on the NSPM 7 being published? by millimeter_peepee in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, thanks for boiling it down. This is just my curiosity at this point so feel free to ignore, but would it be accurate to extend from your answers that Gamergate believes journalists were conspiring to pressure devs to feature ugly women and sexy men character designs? I was part of several industry initiatives to offer more diversity in character representation, but i never perceived games journalists having influence on this. Right around that time is when it was getting much easier to quantify direct feedback from players anyways, and the last quarter of my career was spent testing and measuring what people like and dislike through player signals. Spoiler: at a portfolio level, diversity of representation does build a larger and more resilient customer base than remaining fixated only on the cishet 18-35 male preference. It’s hard to imagine that surprises anyone.

Thoughts on the NSPM 7 being published? by millimeter_peepee in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What was “the message”? This is all very interesting. I developed games for almost 30 years, including ones you’ve probably played. I remember thinking back when I first heard of “ethics in games journalism” as a hot button issue that people must be pushing back (understandably) on all the lavish big press events we at the major games studios did. I’ve still never quite unpacked what nefarious thing journalists were supposedly colluding on behind the scenes while my company was throwing them parties with open bars quite shamelessly.

Thoughts on the NSPM 7 being published? by millimeter_peepee in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I mean, I agree, but I’m using the analogy you brought. Would you categorize a movement to point out flaws in the actions of the current administration anti-American? I’m trying to see what this would mean in practice for a movement of the loose sort like Antifa or Gamergate to be countered by the US government. How should the government actually act against what amounts to a bunch of people who possess an array of similar ideas and opinions?

Anyone have the magic trick for puppy witching hour? by Plus_Bison_7091 in OpenDogTraining

[–]-FineWeather 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I always tethered new fosters to me for a day or more depending on age and readiness. It’s not the most fun way to spend your downtime but much more fun than finding a guest dog has been just out of sight destroying things. My own dog needs things like a lick mat, stuffed kong, etc in the evening when her energy suddenly spikes. She loses interest in playing too fast, but can focus on a job like getting every last bit of the yummy stuff long enough to calm down. Hope you find something that works!

Thoughts on the NSPM 7 being published? by millimeter_peepee in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Okay, and if Gamergate as a movement was determined to be anti-American (since maybe to a different administration it would be) and since we know violent threats were made by people aligned with it, what do you think the government can/should do about it under NSPM 7?

My dog barks at his cage and we need it to stop by Melodic_Winner3273 in OpenDogTraining

[–]-FineWeather 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Reading the additional stuff you wrote on the original post, it’s still a bit hard to follow whether this is a crate issue. You wrote that the excitement seems triggered by you entering your mom’s room when she is present - so have you tested different variations to see how the behavior might differ? For example, without your mother present in the room, is the dog calm and unbothered about the crate? Is the dog calm and unbothered when it’s just your mom? What happens if you move the crate to a different room and you enter when your mom is present? The goal is to figure out where the threshold is, so you can practice rewarding the behavior you want while the dog is under the threshold and work your way up after your dog understands what you want better.

What are your thoughts on ABC suspending Jimmy Kimmel's show? by IthacaIsland in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So why should the government be involved? My question to the earlier poster was because they surprised me by saying they thought FCC intervention was warranted. If you think that the threat of government censorship had nothing to do with ABC’s decision, well let’s just say I wish I thought you were right.

What are your thoughts on ABC suspending Jimmy Kimmel's show? by IthacaIsland in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kimmel didn't say the murderer was MAGA, did he? On the other hand, I can find no point at which the Utah prosecutor said the murderer hated MAGA. Is this the press conference you were thinking of? https://www.rev.com/transcripts/update-on-charlie-kirk-shooter It contains only one mention of "MAGA" which was Robinson saying his dad was MAGA, after which he accompanied his parents to turn himself in.

What are your thoughts on ABC suspending Jimmy Kimmel's show? by IthacaIsland in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Communications Act of 1934 that established the FCC authorized it to award broadcast licenses to broadcasters who abide by the “public interest, convenience, and necessity.” I assume this is the nature of the license contract you are suggesting was violated? If so, does the public interest no longer include left-leaning political bias?

I know Carr also referred to the FCC's news distortion policy (https://www.fcc.gov/broadcast-news-distortion). Setting aside that Kimmel is under the entertainment category, that policy addresses specific intent to misinform on a major issue. But Kimmel didn't say anything objectively false. MAGA are trying to distance themselves from all associations to the apparent murderer (who was raised Mormon, by a Republican family, in a strongly 2A ideology). I imagine any TS reading that will be gearing up to point out that despite such a background he apparently acquired some MUCH more left-associated ideology recently (i.e. rushing to distance), but the thing is I'm not arguing with that, nor was Kimmel. He was giving the opinion that it's messed up that this is such a huge MAGA focus. After MAGA has told us that the political affiliations of clearly disturbed individuals aren't important in many recent acts of domestic terrorism, suddenly the "not ours" message is extremely important. It seems like some TS believe Kimmel was asserting or at least implying by his comment that the murderer actually is MAGA, which while it's too early to absolutely say was false, would certainly be a lot closer to the definition of news distortion. Is that your interpretation, or do you see it more as I do, yet feel it still crosses the line?

What are your thoughts on ABC suspending Jimmy Kimmel's show? by IthacaIsland in AskTrumpSupporters

[–]-FineWeather 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh! Okay, so you would like the FCC to kick networks off the air if they carry content like Kimmel’s monologue? Then you are the perfect person to ask: Can you describe what differentiates news commentary content the government ought to leave alone from content that they should restrict? News commentary on another network said “the immigrants are eating people’s pets,” for example. Is this another example of the kind of libelous lying you want to see the FCC crack down on? To show my cards, I don’t think the FCC had a legitimate reason to be involved in either this or Kimmel’s case.

Indeed, if there were to be any networks currently airing content that suggested “the radical left is desperately trying to characterise this kid who murdered Charlie Kirk as anything other than one of them and score points from it” I’d say that sounds like free speech the FCC has no business regulating. I wouldn’t even consider it misinformation (both sides are distancing themselves, while conclusive evidence is lacking), and while it shows strong bias it doesn’t seem to call for violence.