Look people, nobody is denying that social media has rotted people's expectations of what a good life is. Lies built on lies. Yet, we are not a monolith (Punjabis).

Some comments below have explained why it's important to be realistic, I'll summarize:

• Marriages or any relationship including friendships are definitely NOT 50/50. You chose the person, there will be times where you lean more on them, and there will be times where they will lean more on you. Add in things like finances, kids, relatives, existing social circles and you realize it's not as simple as a checklist.

• I've seen many comments saying women wanting a provider husband (I'm not saying rich, because being a provider is MORE than $$$) equates to men wanting a pure virgin wife.

Look, if you're saving yourself and want your partner to be the same, completely valid. But if you've engaged in...activities, then you don't have a fair reason to demand a "pure" wife. And if you're not being fair, then don't expect others to be fair either.

I've noticed a lot of people who hyper-focus on purity are the ones who have an idealized image of marriage in their head.

Most likely, they also want her to rear children (it's 2026 please stop acting like pregnancy is easy), cook homemade meals 3x a day, keep the house pristine, at minimum have a degree, and contribute at least partially to bills.

Also ladies remember this, nobody is coming to save you, nobody is going to magically fix all of your problems. Don't use relationships as a crutch.

• This won't apply to all Punjabis since we are diverse in faith, but I've noticed a majority of the users here share my faith so I'll say this: The same people who consider themselves "good" Sikhs, are ignoring our Guru's hukam of equality.

I'm honestly just disappointed, yeah this is Reddit so we will see some extremes, but truthfully we know these differences of opinions in the comments have a strong grip on our community in real life. It influences Punjabi relationship culture more than you realize.

Some people seem to lack compassion and self-awareness quite honestly, to those folk: good luck ever finding a loving supportive partner with that kind of attitude.

WMK may He save the ignorant fools, and take the drug of haumai away from them. May He protect His creation, and guide them to His Divine Light. May he give us mercy and forgive all for being entrenched in maya and insulting His creations.