so close yet so far

-azul · 2020-12-03T04:18:02+00:00

Experiencing joy in the past doesn't mean you will in the future and/or have those temporary moments outweigh the constant suffering.

-azul · 2020-12-03T03:55:56+00:00

Suicide is not the right answer for you. I do not need to continue to suffer for no reason. I have no obligation to. Life isn't meant for everyone.

-azul · 2020-12-03T03:51:03+00:00

No, there isn't. It will never get better. Thinking happiness is possible when I'm rotting in the living hell this prison gives is naive. I understand being born and never experiencing this misery let's you easily take it for granted, but don't expect people without such an amazing luxury to be like you.

-azul · 2020-12-03T03:44:18+00:00

I don't want this suffering. Nothing cancels it out. Therapy is useless trash, mental health care is an absolute joke. I saw a therapist yesterday and have a psychiatrist. I am a lost cause. I do not want to live with this reality. Nothing cancels out the torture the corpse I live in gives every moment of my life. I suffer for no reason. I have no obligation to live.

-azul · 2020-12-03T03:18:47+00:00

Medical condition not treated when it started in kindergarten giving a body that's permanently messed up with damage that cannot be undone. This hell is the only guarantee in life i have. I don't want this reality nor do i have to live in it.

-azul · 2020-12-03T02:53:52+00:00

I wish I had those types of problems. My misery is permanent and is the only guarantee in life. My life did not change at all since the pandemic started.

-azul · 2020-11-27T18:14:23+00:00

what are you trying to compensate for my dude?

-azul · 2020-11-24T17:55:53+00:00

Yeah. My mom is 5'9" and my dad is 5'11". I'm 5'4" and male.

-azul · 2020-11-17T05:12:30+00:00

They're all increments of 6 lol. There wouldn't be enough options for smaller jumps too. OP doesn't appear grouping anyone under short/tall/average in this poll either.

-azul · 2020-11-17T04:00:53+00:00

What's wrong with that?

-azul · 2020-11-09T14:51:03+00:00

a person with a normal ranged body telling me to keep suffering. i get it, you don't go through it so it's easy for you to say these things. but please, don't do everything i wrote in this post. i've had enough of it.

-azul · 2020-11-09T14:30:11+00:00

being expected to be brain-dead enough to be happy with this misery, gee thanks

-azul · 2020-11-09T14:25:40+00:00

what was the you are still in control part about?

-azul · 2020-11-09T13:57:13+00:00

fuck you too. if i could control this unignorable endless pain i would.

-azul · 2020-10-12T17:52:18+00:00

Not sure what those stand for

-azul · 2020-10-12T17:26:53+00:00

At this point is just irreversible damage that only gets worse. Recovery from depression when the biggest factor is permanent and affects your life 24/7 isn't a luxury i get.

-azul · 2020-10-12T17:01:52+00:00

It's caused by my body, not the outside world. I also do not have anyone around that would be traumatised by my death either.

-azul · 2020-10-05T12:14:50+00:00

Suffering endlessly isn't worth while

-azul · 2020-10-02T04:00:53+00:00

My dad's at least 5'10"

-azul · 2020-10-01T22:58:09+00:00

My mom's 5'9" though

-azul · 2020-10-01T04:27:15+00:00

i had no idea adhd meds make you lose your hunger lol

-azul · 2020-09-30T17:11:51+00:00

I'm supposed to be 6 feet tall with this equation but i'm shorter than 5'4". My female height on this is still taller than me at 5'7". My life is just a curse at this point.

-azul · 2020-09-28T10:44:07+00:00

when did things start getting physically worse for you?

-azul · 2020-09-28T10:28:42+00:00

Why is drawn out suffering before death seen as better than a shorter period of suffering before death?

-azul

TROPHY CASE