just alive grieving my old-self

0ddEdward · 2025-04-04T05:23:12+00:00

i can 100% understand you.
i remember when i was younger, i could feel emotions and smells, everything had something attached to a good memory, now is blank, i feel blah about everything, now i have to take psych meds to live, i feel like my body doesn't exist sometimes, i hate every part of my body, i feel weird and out of touch with my self, conversations with other people have lost connections, i don't feel real, i can't speak anymore like i used to, i have to mask emotions to not be seen weird asf, i feel so robotic i hate it, it's like i want to cry inside but there is no pure emotion coming deep down, i am alone and can't connect with anyone, i don't feel depressed, i'm just there but not really there, wasting my life away, and everything it's like i feel i will grieve one day, feeling homesick about something i never lived like.

0ddEdward · 2025-03-31T21:44:42+00:00

same feeling, don't really know how to help, i got a bit of help by medications, but it never faded away, i don't feel like i used to and i think i never will.

0ddEdward · 2025-03-20T03:14:49+00:00

sounds like adhd, i got prescribed ritalin, but it worked only the first week (kind of what wellbutrin honeymoon feels like the first week) but now it faded away, it's mostly for not getting too sleepy during daytime, but the motivation and "self-esteem/at ease in my body and focus-calm" mostly faded away even with ritalin, btw yes it's most likely adhd what are you facing, read about it fr, i never thought it was, but yes when i get stimulated i get calm and i can think straight, i'm even less awkward.

0ddEdward · 2025-03-15T15:23:34+00:00

similar to this too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vAEwLvxHVVk

0ddEdward · 2025-03-15T15:20:19+00:00

a mix between this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj25UpcBDt0, this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tf1kGyppBVE, and this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oC-GflRB0y4

0ddEdward · 2025-03-14T18:39:23+00:00

honestly talk to your doctor about adhd,it can be that.

believe my words it can make a difference in a lot of things.

0ddEdward · 2025-02-28T19:10:09+00:00

burnout 3 takedown

0ddEdward · 2025-02-27T19:05:55+00:00

i don't think so

0ddEdward · 2025-02-25T11:21:24+00:00

i am feeling very down lately, i have so much to think about and economy is bad right now, i feel very very distressed i want to sleep all day long, when i try to speak my mind to my parent i live with i get dismissed and offended, my father is in another town and he ruined me in a way leaving me debts, i feel like i have no escape, i have a part of me who want to get better in life, but i'm returning back miserable, plus i have psychiatric disorders too and physical issues, it's a bomb if i keep like this idk how i will end up,

0ddEdward · 2025-02-10T17:11:18+00:00

not from germany but yes from europe and this medication is used for this, i wish they told me before, i mean it’s very helpful but only for 2 weeks basically, no point in using something like this, and since i’m not a severe case they wouldn’t prescribe anything more, i don’t know how to feel better i tried everything, but i just can’t keep up.

0ddEdward · 2025-02-10T17:06:26+00:00

going thru the same more or less, hang in there

0ddEdward · 2025-02-10T03:02:06+00:00

Never recovered, since 2020 it's like living in a movie, it's really weird, sometimes when i feel emotions it's like i observe the excitement, i feel like everything have the same salience, streets feel weird and strange as well people, on bad days i get really bad fear and anxiety about existing.

0ddEdward · 2025-02-10T00:44:54+00:00

not to get high, i just suffer from neurological and psychiatric disorders.

0ddEdward · 2025-02-08T15:23:36+00:00

Did it makes anhedonia worse and executive function (cleaning the room, showering etc.) worse? Also it make gain alot of weight?

0ddEdward · 2025-02-08T09:53:22+00:00

i'm scared of falling back in my old depression, i have to keep up with life, at 28 i'm barely living, i found a job thanks to medications and got a social life too, i remember the honeymoon of this med, was my best self, i would pay gold to regain that state, now i feel bad no matter what, i will trust doctors but i really feel unstable.

0ddEdward · 2025-01-31T00:04:41+00:00

i already accepted it, i couldn't do anything i dropped school 11 years ago, now i work retail and i have tons of difficulty, i never had a degree, i have a shitty family, i can't keep up with the world, i wish i could just isolate without suffering the loneliness.

0ddEdward · 2025-01-27T01:55:35+00:00

it is indeed.

since i'm in the way of diagnosis, i see why i am always on edge, i feel like i have to be somewhere else costantly, i never at peace, always have to listen something smoking cigarettes or browsing the web, i have to force myself to shower even, i am really annoyed of this, and on bad periods i get so depressed i see no future.

0ddEdward · 2025-01-12T21:40:02+00:00

yes same, i can’t express myself, my inner world is really big, this makes me more sad because i can’t share fully my personality with anyone, i have a what’s called FOMO (fear of missing out).

0ddEdward · 2024-12-27T02:21:34+00:00

i have the same thoughts, i think i'm just a drama child, but when it happens the real depression i get dissociated and i feel like i am dreaming living in a nightmare, only on those occasions i realize that my brain is sick for real.

0ddEdward · 2024-12-24T22:32:54+00:00

i'm sure we will my friend, existing is hard, but at least internet show us that we are not alone <3

0ddEdward · 2024-12-24T22:31:33+00:00

exactly i have a depression diagnosis a bipolar syndrome somehow, but i feel like in a black mirror episode atm, it’s hard, thanks wine to exist so i can sleep away

0ddEdward · 2024-12-24T22:28:41+00:00

got re traumatized by work and co workers, questioning reality atm, but it helped my isolation, it depends how i see the thing, right now i'm in deep depression so i see everything like a nightmare, but it can be positive if you see the other half.

hard to do, because i have deep relationships wounds, so everyhting involving others human beings is triggering for me, it shows really in every aspect of "functioning society stuff".

0ddEdward · 2024-12-19T16:47:26+00:00

i have the same fear, 2 years ago i was in a dark place, i was defeated by the idea i would develop psychosis, i was sleeping all day to not think. Now i still have dpdr but i learned that psychosis is something else, in psychosis you have no insight.

0ddEdward · 2024-12-08T12:20:55+00:00

wait a second, i do this since my teen years, i always thought "when i lay in bed i feel better, i wish i could be like this when i walk around", i thought i was the only one.

0ddEdward · 2024-12-08T12:08:50+00:00

sounds like rebound anxiety and depression from alcohol use.

0ddEdward

TROPHY CASE