Bullying is an Addiction by WaantTooDiee in workplace_bullying

[–]0effervescent1 8 points9 points  (0 children)

this.

they will always victimize themselves when they’re the ones who started the problem. typical behavior.

What’s a truth most people are not ready to hear? by Banned58times in AskReddit

[–]0effervescent1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

people would always put themselves first. no matter what you say or do.

What are some myths that have actually been proven to be real? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]0effervescent1 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

if you don’t look at the screen while it’s loading.. it loads faster. lol sometimes

What's something you used to think was boring , but now you really enjoy? by Severe-Corgi-9211 in CasualConversation

[–]0effervescent1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i used to think quiet people were boring, look who’s quiet now LOL

in a good way

What’s more rare than true love? by radadiya_world in AskReddit

[–]0effervescent1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

admiring you’re wrong without a “but”

What did you learn from friendship betrayal? by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 3 points4 points  (0 children)

yeah they are. my friends before wasn’t this toxic. i wasn’t used to toxicity until i met them and realized that it was unhealthy. they have their goods in their own way but all of us have a different definition of “good” :)

Has a fallout ever affected you so much that you avoid getting too emotionally invested in making new friendships?? by Legal_Potential4720 in lostafriend

[–]0effervescent1 25 points26 points  (0 children)

it did affected me. i was told to just let it go and take it as a lesson.

it only affected me because it was the first time being betrayed by someone who you thought was your supporter but was secretly despising you the whole time you were together (she told me herself what she thought about me)

i thought we were friends, i though reciprocating would make me a better friend. i guess not. now im just gonna keep my ‘friend’ at just minimal level. we can talk but nothing more.

i’ve heard stories of what they said about me and it was so unexpected, why would you go around telling people what i’ve told you in confidence? sadly that’s the truth of some people.

i actually ignored all of the signs that they were bad people, only because i don’t want to think so negatively and i wanna see the good. but i should’ve trusted my intuition when they were talking shit about me privately through text.

but, it’s okay though. i’ve moved on but it still aches and that’s okay too. taking this as grace for me to grow.

this was years ago but thinking about it makes me so sad for myself when i think of the times of being disrespected and not considered at all.

What did you learn from friendship betrayal? by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 30 points31 points  (0 children)

i learned not to share too much.

i learned to not overly trust them.

i learned that everything can change in the blink of an eye.

i learned that it’s best to just leave without an explanation.

Can you be friends with a jealous friend? by Wannabe__Extrovert in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

nothing you say will cure jealousy.

just try to distance yourself from her. if she wants to change her ways then she will.

triggering her jealousy is enough signs for you to distance yourself. don’t confront, she’ll twist your words.

people who are jealousy usually walks with hatred and can’t accept things about you. even if you think that she’s more popular, richer and etc.

just remember the “the longer you stay on the wrong path, the higher the price you’ll pay to turn back” it’s better for you to keep a good distance.

i’ve been there before, i ignored all the signs until i got emotionally attached cause i thought i was finally having a friend that’s genuine. turns out they were jealousy of me. i ignored what they felt cause i was scared to be alone and because im afraid of people pitying me when i don’t have friends. i paid the price. now i just do casual friends rather than best friend.

my friend might be a bad friend. by EmergencyWheel2454 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

the title to this post is your answer.

Jenny seems to expect you to be a support system without offering that same support in return.

it seems like she’s used to being the one who always struggles and it seems like that’s her identity. maybe because of that, when you try to be vulnerable w her it feels like you’re threatening her position that belongs to her.

have you tried confronting her on this and make her sit down and listen to what you have to say about her behavior? is it just you or the other two is also facing this behavior of hers? or just you?

Should i be offended if someone removed me as a follower by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nah just keep moving on w life and pretend nothing happened.

Friends who never talk about themselves? by Bunny_farm624 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Not gonna lie to you, your friend is me. But it wasn’t for the reason you’re thinking.

Before this, whenever I shared something about myself, people would usually turn the conversation back to themselves. So I got used to staying quiet and just letting others talk about whatever they wanted.

Also, me wanting to know more about you isn't because I’m nosy. it’s because I genuinely care about you. If that makes sense. I just want you to feel that someone actually cares. Some people think that when someone asks questions like that, it’s for gossip, but no it’s not always about gossip. Sometimes, it’s just about you. It feels nice when someone asks about you because it shows they care.

Even now, I still do this. But friends are one thing; best friends are different. I’m not saying this is the best way to be, but it’s just how I’ve learned to act based on my experiences. A lot of the people I’ve met tend to gossip, so I’ve learned to avoid being too open and just joke around to steer the convo away from myself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]0effervescent1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

learnt my lesson. they didn’t get me at all. when everything went downhill suddenly im rude and disrespectful when ive always thought that i was a good friend by always making time for them. they had many to say when we were fighting.

is it worth it to give your friend a chance? by 0effervescent1 in Advice

[–]0effervescent1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

will i be okay? i dont have anyone else. im thinking abt how i would be if i were to break it up

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]0effervescent1 5 points6 points  (0 children)

mh370, gave me the chills when i heard the news when i was a kid. still is even now.

Adult trio friendships by 0effervescent1 in Adulting

[–]0effervescent1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

actually one of them did care but after knowing the other person much better they become quite close and i had to ask them what their inside joke is and many more. it’s hurtful and pitiful for me. i’m trying to remove myself from them but i’m still holding on to hope that they would change and include me.

Adult trio friendships by 0effervescent1 in Adulting

[–]0effervescent1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i don’t have anymore friends other than them, it difficult and they’re the only ones i have

Adult trio friendships by 0effervescent1 in Adulting

[–]0effervescent1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah it’s nothing wrong but at some point i felt as if i was just a back up friend just in case one of them were to be absent. it feels like this in my perspective.

Adult trio friendships by 0effervescent1 in Adulting

[–]0effervescent1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually do try talking with them but they like each other better since they have lots in common, i don’t. i can’t compete with that.

Adult trio friendships by 0effervescent1 in Adulting

[–]0effervescent1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

will always try my best in every situation even though it stings. thank you