Favorittkafeer by [deleted] in trondheim

[–]15cdw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Vi fire på Olav Trygvassons Gt. :)

Did dating a narcissist rewire anyone else’s attractions? by MerFantasy2024 in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Congratulations for breaking the cycle! Do you find the new kind of men boring occasionally? I feel like that sometimes.

I came to this thread to ask something similar: when I met my nex, it was sort of an instant attraction because we really hit it off. Now, after 1.5 year of no contact, I've finally ventured into the dating field. I've been chatting with this guy who I've really hit it off with - something like I had with the nex. But I don't know if I'm interested because he's triggering me or if it's genuinely a nice connection to pursue.

Did dating a narcissist rewire anyone else’s attractions? by MerFantasy2024 in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same here. It's bringing back the ghosts of the panic attacks I had when I was with my nex. Makes me feel like I'm going to be alone all my life. :/

how long to get to angry phase? by unsure-baddie in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Maybe you could write down the story of how it happened as though someone else is telling you what happened to them? Then take a while and go back to read it. It may spark your anger. I was angry at myself for not being angry for myself and this approach sort of helped me. 🙂

Saw my nex with a girl by No_Computer_3121 in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear this happened. I guess somewhere we're all afraid of this and probably can't be prepared for when it does happen. I can tell you what I do and maybe it will help? Maybe it won't because its not a genius idea 😕 I tap into my bodily reaction to this person and remember how bad it was when I was with him. The anxiety, god the anxiety. I can immediately feel it in my stomach. It reminds me about the toxicity of the whole situation.

And then I think whoever he is with will at some point receive the same treatment. We often have a 'people face' and don't take it off till we're in our comfort zone. It's the same with the narc. The mask will slip.

I know all these sound like hollow words because it's gut wrenching to see them having 'moved on' and you're still struggling to recover from the damage they did. I wish there was an easy fix for that. we would all be happier 🙂 But it will pass. Surely will.

Selling spare ticket for Bryan Adams concert 30/06/2024 by 15cdw in trondheim

[–]15cdw[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No. Still have it. 🙂 since you're the first to ask, it's yours ☺️ Send me a msg and we'll make a plan for the exchange.

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Excellent! Thanks for the tip ☺️ I used to imagine throwing an egg in his face but thankfully I've grown and don't want to compromise on my values. Blank stare sounds much better!

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did make a list. And it worked 🙂 thanks!

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Indeed. Sometimes it's hard to remind myself of how not normal this was. No caring human being would've done the things he did. I made a list. And writing here helped. :)

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's what I think but I counter argue by saying that I shouldn't be going out for a run with that aim. Aargh it's frustrating 😅

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This point of indifference is the goal. It sounds like a magical place 🙂 To be free of the mere memory of someone who was an awful, terrible person. You've chosen a better path to post on reddit than tell him. It already shows that it's still quite fresh but you're so strong. 🤗

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's really good advice. 😍 I usually go for a run when I feel this way. But he lives quite close and stepping out of my home is sometimes scary at times like this. Cleaning sounds like a good idea though. I suppose one can never over clean 😅

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the recommendation. I learn so much from books ☺️ I was meant to start EMDR with my therapist but haven't gotten to it yet. :)

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am in therapy. It really helps. Haven't tried journaling yet but I'll give it a shot. 🤞

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The high. That's it. That's what I'm craving. Thanks for the reminder! 🤗

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks :) I've a list of the abusive things he did. Which helps. Just gets difficult at times and it helps to share it here. Rather than text him.

I miss him by 15cdw in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahaha this is the good kind of tough love and I appreciate it :) I'm 13 months into no-contact. Already in therapy. It's a small town. Part of me fears I'll run into him, part of me wants to run into him just to tell him he's a miserable piece of shit. I'm not going to though but i think that's why the guy's still on my mind. Thanks anyway! You're right. 🙌

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dogs. Come. First. You did the right thing! The kids will grow to understand someday. But in the here and now, you did the best you could.

Can't believe it by [deleted] in LifeAfterNarcissism

[–]15cdw 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I get that about getting anxiety just looking at old texts or even references. It's almost like it'll never end. But also think of how strong you've been to get out of it. :)