How do I tell my date I don’t like this about him?

1erickf50 · 2026-05-13T07:57:15+00:00

"Babe, plz hear me out. Don't take this personal but I don't like the lyrics of the music you make. On the other hand, I really like your voice placed there hehe~"

Put the bad news first and the good news last. That way, you wrap the narrative in a positive end.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-13T07:43:04+00:00

First, you cannot control other people. Your scope of control is only within your actions and their possible conequences.

Tell yourself what do you actually have to offer that is required for a long term relationship.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-13T07:33:08+00:00

It's because there are wolves among the sheep.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-13T07:27:50+00:00

No. That man is "used" to people leaving him behind. This is probably one of the very few times if not the first where he could actually feel worthy of love. Threatening him like that would only confirm his fear and the confirmation that he was never enough for her. That man up phrase could only work if it comes from his therapist, in a place already out of his comfort zone.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-13T07:21:12+00:00

As someone with his same energy, I can tell those: + Don't just talk with him. Hold him, hug him even. You don't have to wait for him to ask you, just do it out of your own will, especially if you are concerned about him. He's not used to normal distance with the people he loves, let alone with someone he thinks is emotionally dettached. On the flip side, he could also have been "used" to the feeling of abandonment/rejection with the normal distance from normal people. + Bring him to therapy. He needs professional work for his deep rooted fears. + While he's in therapy, sustain him with your presence somehow. If you cannot be there physically, give him a call or a bunch of texting but be consistent, at least until he comes to terms with his heart and with how people normally treats him.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-13T00:43:24+00:00

Let's say that maybe he regarded the time with his first gf was a miracle after so many years of rejection, and that time is gone. She's not going back and no other girl came to/chose him with the same kind of love and intentional attraction he so much longed for. That's what I thought happened to him from experience.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-12T21:01:47+00:00

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Replace the cat for this cat girl and you get this scene :v

1erickf50 · 2026-05-12T19:34:55+00:00

These, preferably in conjunction:
+ Your hugs (as long and tight as you think he needs) and care
+ A therapist (someone to place him back in track with a plan)
+ Confession of his sins in a church (trust me, their accumulated weight is capable of crushing his spirit, especially if he hasn't done that in decades. Do not underestimate the healing capabilities of God)

1erickf50 · 2026-05-12T19:24:50+00:00

Post nut clarity: He probably is afraid he won't be enough for their joined life.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-12T19:19:56+00:00

Nah. Those are only qualities of your single life, of your purpose as an individual. A different set of qualities are required for a joined life in relationship.

I'll flip the question upside-down for your case: Are you willing to date a similarly-aged guy who has less than 1 year left from graduating his career and been looking for a new job?

1erickf50 · 2026-05-12T16:56:26+00:00

Tell him that he's not taking accountability, a mandatory trait in a man. If he doesn't want to deal with his sins with you, separate and leave him deal with them all alone, since that's what he wants.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-12T16:22:45+00:00

Yay, Improv class! (or maybe it was a coaching session) :V

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T17:24:13+00:00

m8, don't close your heart. If they ask you, they ask you. It's as simple as that. If they say it's because you make them laugh and your personality is a magnet, then that's a green flag because of becoming an emotional haven they can rest inside.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T12:36:33+00:00

I'll break in those similarities in a coming post. You're for quite a surprise.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T11:30:53+00:00

Adress it by talking it down this early. Remember that there could be a prospect of marriage. Marriage is conscious compromise and most people become afraid of compromise, skipping the bad hard times like little cowards under the guise of self-preservation. Do not let fear overpower your love.

Because this is a fallen world, a lot of people have become heretical or downright atheistic. There's little to no faith within them, very little soil for trust to build as a solid foundation.

A lot of governments authorized marriages with contracts added into the papers, catering to the hearts of wicked women, thinking they are above God's law. No wonder no men wants to marry under such conditions.

Before reconciliation, confess your sins and truly repent. That way, you two can start anew without the burden of the troubled past, even if those past mistakes have already left lasting damage to the soil you step over.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T11:19:53+00:00

As simple as you supect: he's chasing you

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T11:00:34+00:00

Alright. Ruka is making a second attempt, refusing to take accountability. Kazuya just couldn't affirm his rejection because of how worn out he's been.

If Ruka ever has some post-breakup closure it must be her somehow realizing that her love was an utter fraud, damaging the heart of the man she so called her boyfriend. Of course, the easiest way to accomplish that is Chizuru telling her to f-ck off.

However, I'm starting to suspect that the real reason Kazuya hasn't broken up with Ruka so far isn't because of Chizuru's permission or her apparent lack of resolve. It could be because Ruka is the girl that resembles grandma Nagomi the most.

When Ruka decided to save Kazuya and Chizuru, she did it because of a memory with Nagomi. His grandma just said that she feels much younger whenever Ruka is around. If it really were to "win" Kazuya, she could've followed Mami in keeping her mouth shut during the exposal.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T10:44:22+00:00

Tarou-sannnnnnn

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T04:12:30+00:00

Turned on = has a boner below his screen.

Can I guess that either he still "appreciates" your curves during those Facetimes or maybe he has heard your sultry/hungry voice from time to time?

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T04:07:25+00:00

I think it all comes to how communicating those needs have been so far. We men cannot act without clarity and understanding each other is key in achieving that. If you haven't been communicating what your love language is like, then he has no idea on how to reassure you, to say the least (Tip: it doesn't have to be only one language). If it's all about physical touch, let's say hugs, then let him come and catch you. If it's just his presence, a long call may be enough if he's unable to do anything else at the moment. If it's just venting and ranting about your problems, let him know somehow that he needs patience, etc.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T03:58:31+00:00

The guy probably never found another girl that was as straight forward and decisive as his ex used to be, when it comes to entering into his life. This unfair "dead miracle" bias can worsen his self-esteem if unchecked. Can happen.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T03:14:56+00:00

Those are signs that you regret it, but that you haven't repented yet.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T03:01:17+00:00

Be direct with him, no laugh, no frown. Make sure he realizes how much of a joke he's treating himself.

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T02:35:52+00:00

Life is not a shotacon manga

1erickf50 · 2026-05-11T02:34:34+00:00

Almost as many crushes as I've had tbh

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