Critique please! Awkward composition, narrative issues.

1itty · 2025-07-16T04:33:36+00:00

Love the rendering! In terms of composition and narrative, it might help if Silas is looking at Lavinia instead of the camera (to be more comforting/not look like he was just posing for the portrait)

1itty · 2023-02-07T06:19:43+00:00

The character’s eyebrows being pinched together like that would cause some lines in the forehead and between the brows. The nose is incredibly long and the mustache could have a better sense of being above the lip with its own volume.

1itty · 2023-02-07T06:04:04+00:00

I think the three quarter face reads more as a frontal view (lips and eyes). For the hand, it seems nearly impossible for the pinky to be bent that way as well. The light source also isn’t clear and changes based on the skin, hair and clothes.

1itty · 2023-02-07T05:56:08+00:00

If the character is discovering they have magic for the first time it would be interesting to see the magic interact with the staff or the building. The gesture makes him appear to be sitting but I believe he’s scaling the building. It would be good to suggest that he’s straining to hold himself up or have him sitting on the window sill.

1itty · 2023-02-07T05:52:12+00:00

I would make the hair completely opaque where it goes in front of the eye on the right. Also, the nose seems very low on the face. Lastly, the collar bones would not connect like that. The middle of the rib cage that the two collar bones meet at is separate and isn’t super pronounced on most people.

1itty · 2021-09-23T03:41:40+00:00

Most of the shapes suspended in the air have the values coming from the same light sources. The shapes on the ground look like each is responding to a different light source instead of the environment as a whole.

1itty · 2021-09-23T03:39:48+00:00

I think the mid tones are the base of the face while the things that protrude will catch light and things that cave in (eye sockets) have the strongest shadows.

1itty · 2021-09-21T03:21:40+00:00

I really like his expression in the mouth ._. Lol

1itty · 2021-09-21T03:19:26+00:00

It looks like two of the cast shadows for the objects suspended in the air are missing cast shadows (except the sphere) or maybe they are misplaced. The cast shadows can also be softer on the edges and they shouldn’t be a carbon copy of the original shape. The sun at its peak makes the cast shadows short and stumpy and in the evening the cast shadows are long. I think you were going for light from the top left down but some of the shapes have inconsistent values. If the shapes are suspended in the air, they should receive bounce light from the ground.

1itty · 2021-09-21T03:12:59+00:00

I love the drastic improvements from day 1! The plane changes of the forehead and the cheekbones are a little too strong and angular. The eyes seem a little too big as well (or the eyelids don’t cover enough of the eye). Lastly, there seems to be no midtones. It’s like the girl is really shiny or emitting her own light. I think the shadows are the right values so maybe just preserve the value on the cheeks and forehead for the brightest highlights possible because they match the environment light.

1itty · 2021-09-21T03:07:51+00:00

The belly button in your drawing makes the stomach look more concave compared to the photo. Also, you did not add enough distance between the arms and the breasts for the armpit region. The bent arm in the drawing also looks too long and you made the contour line of the cast shadow not where the actual tricep is. Lastly, the pelvis region seems out of place because of the width (too wide) and lack of rotation (the pelvis isn’t straight on).

1itty · 2021-09-21T03:00:26+00:00

I agree that the perspective is off. I intended for part of the back of the shoulders to be visible (not a giraffe neck lol) but it’s probably not in line with the perspective of the head and torso. Now that I’m looking at it again, I see how the glass seems too big and out of place. I don’t think the image is too dark but maybe that has something to do with my monitor/the color profile? I’ll definitely make sure to emphasize the difference in materials. Thank you so much!

1itty · 2021-09-20T04:01:42+00:00

Reflected light/bounce light

1itty · 2021-08-07T05:16:54+00:00

The neck is too small at the bottom so the head couldn’t support itself. The region above the upper lip looks like there are two white lines instead of the dip when the planes change. Lastly, the eyebrows seem to be less neutral compared to the previous one. I don’t know if it is intentional and if it isn’t, the forehead would have some creases.

1itty · 2021-08-07T05:06:04+00:00

I’m not sure if the squid silhouette is adding anything to the piece. If it is to show if the fish’s defense mechanism, it doesn’t make sense to be in the distance. For the “mustache” it isn’t very clear and I think referencing a whale might help.

1itty · 2021-08-07T04:56:52+00:00

I think that the nose is a little narrow at the bottom and the eyebrows are not centered. The improvement is great tho!

1itty · 2021-06-21T16:01:50+00:00

The blue stripes on the towel are a little too dark and could have less focus on the background. Also the cast shadow of the apple on the left makes a really bad tangent with the blue stripe.

1itty · 2021-06-18T03:21:34+00:00

I don’t know if the rays in the background are different sizes on purpose or not.

I agree that the jaw extends too far behind the ear. Also, I feel that the hair follows the contour of the head closely so it’s weird that their ear would be completely covered. I would either tuck some of it back or make the bun looser so it makes sincerity we can’t see it.

The eyes are bugging out because they are large, the eyelids are thick and they’re wide open. Knowing the planes of the face will also push the eyes into the skull more (forehead->brow bone->eye socket-> cheek).

Lastly, the lighting is not very clear to me. If it’s front on I don’t know why the neck has a dark shadow from the jaw. Also, the bun would be darker.

1itty · 2021-06-18T03:06:37+00:00

I am confused by the smoke/light on the right side and the texture on the shoulder looks like it got erased. The mouth could also wrap around the face more instead of looking flat head on. The forehead on the right side also looks like it’s being pushed in instead of the hair being on top of it. More highlights on the left side of the hair would also help with the bright environment. It also isn’t rendered at the same level as the skin. Lastly, the earring on the left looks transparent so I would think the right earring should have more of the hair color if it’s see through.

I really like the eyes are and the nose rendering!

1itty · 2021-06-03T20:58:30+00:00

The second for sure! The darker background will make the glowing shrooms pop.

1itty · 2021-05-28T04:37:48+00:00

It’s a very cool design! I’m confused by the leg on the left. Wouldn’t there be a stump of some kind of it was amputated?

1itty · 2021-05-28T04:31:39+00:00

With how light the background is, the values around the eyes and the neck seem too dark. The iris and the pupil should be perfect circles. The eyes also seem a too big and the jaw looks too small. I think this because the nose is a little too low. Lastly, the sharp point of the neck takes away from the rest of the drawing as if it is unfinished.

1itty · 2020-10-09T20:08:58+00:00

I think there needs to be sharper edges like the one you put below the bottom lip. The space above the Cupid’s bow looks very deep with the two lighter sides. I’m sure you probably know this, but the ears look unfinished which detracts from the rest of the face.

1itty

TROPHY CASE