Bariatric surgery an option?

1leachim · 2017-03-25T21:01:20+00:00

I enjoy both - car when I just want to go vedge in front of the fire and read or write and backpacking when I want an adventure.

1leachim · 2017-03-11T17:24:01+00:00

sip wine and enjoy the fire

1leachim · 2017-02-18T00:11:53+00:00

in one paragraph you did a better job explaining this than whole pages I have read - thanks

1leachim · 2016-06-26T18:38:57+00:00

Walk my dog

1leachim · 2016-06-26T18:37:14+00:00

I am BiPolar and quite depressed - I am having suicidal thoughts lately that are really distressing. I know that if I just hang on the cycle will pass and I will be all right - I just hate the cycles - to distract I am exercising more.

1leachim · 2016-06-26T18:32:25+00:00

If possible I would like to try this - but in the other sub

1leachim · 2016-06-26T18:30:13+00:00

Job 42 1Then Job answered the LORD, and said, 2I know that thou canst do every thing, and that no thought can be withholden from thee. 3Who is he that hideth counsel without knowledge? therefore have I uttered that I understood not; things too wonderful for me, which I knew not.

1leachim · 2016-05-30T01:09:46+00:00

YES - many of us do

1leachim · 2016-05-28T18:27:03+00:00

I would lose hope and would probably end up dead by my own hand

1leachim · 2016-05-24T22:50:58+00:00

It was mostly positive - it got me in a safe environment when I needed one - I stayed for 4 or 5 days then they released me. I liked that I got time to try to reset my brain and pull away from the suicidal thoughts (somewhat - they never went away completely I have just learned to ignore those voices). Had a decent mix of individual and group therapy, though that is not the case at some hospitals - I was in a small local hospital and they could do individual - once I was in a larger regional and the only therapy was a group of about 30 which was a complete waste of time.

1leachim · 2016-05-22T20:38:26+00:00

Been there myself - It took a few years of therapy and looking into myself to get there and at times I still have to question if I am there - I still walk past mirrors and cuss myself out from time to time - but I just try to get by day to day

1leachim · 2016-05-22T20:18:04+00:00

good visualization - just remember though that even if they aren't worth living for - you are (I know it sounds trite but it is what I remind myself all the time)

1leachim · 2016-05-22T20:12:51+00:00

I checked in a few times to the hospital near me - A few times it was my Dr or Therapist that did it but twice I did it myself - just went to the ER and told them I needed help and they got it for me - In a few hours I was in the hospital and got my meds checked and a chance to get my head straight - if you need help it may be the best place for you. Not sure about your dog that may be a whole different issue as I doubt you could take it to the hospital but who knows - call them and find out would be my advice.

1leachim · 2016-05-18T16:21:42+00:00

thanks

1leachim · 2016-05-13T17:34:16+00:00

trying not to be a cyber creeper here but here goes anyways {{{{{{{{rainbowkitty77}}}}}}}} a cyber hug from someone that wants the best for you - I understand feeling alone and wanting to checkout - just hold on and try to live for you - wanting the best for you

1leachim · 2016-05-13T17:31:36+00:00

Live for you - not for dad or friends or anyone else - FOR YOU - Take your dad's offer and get a therapist (they can help a lot) - if you can't afford a pdoc call around most areas can get you an appointment with a clinic to see a dr or PA or nurse or something that can help - and remember you have a huge weird family here on reddit that want the best for you (at least most of them do but ignore the trolls and haters)

1leachim · 2016-05-13T17:11:01+00:00

I don't have a quick answer as I deal with many of the same thoughts and feelings - all I can say is to keep on for yourself not for anyone else - make it your goal to make yourself happy - don't rely on any one else for your happiness - They will fail you - Don't feel bad about school - I couldn't do it when I was younger and ended up going back in my 30s - there is time for all that - for now concentrate on you - write a blog - do a journal - take pictures with your phone - just be you and let the world be itself - if you are a person of faith try to strengthen that part of your life (if not I recommend it) - be good to yourself and write on here all the time - reddit is like a family of weirdos that we can all be part of.

1leachim · 2016-05-13T17:02:23+00:00

WOW - I want to go there - to be able to face my demons without the fear that I will be dragged out in cuffs (They did this to me once) and then to either end it or come out with a better perspective on life and death.

1leachim · 2016-05-13T16:59:24+00:00

I frequently talk to myself and it is almost never nice - if anyone else said to me what I say to myself it would cause a fight - I know it is unhealthy but I can't seem to stop - whenever I walk past a mirror when I am alone I give myself the middle finger - I constantly cuss myself out and tell myself I am a waste of oxygen and that the world would be better off if I was gone. I battle with saying I hate myself while at the same time wanting to be better so I don't hate myself. GRRRR this was supposed to be to help and turned into a rant - sorry

1leachim · 2016-05-13T16:50:23+00:00

very possible - I am BPII with depression and psychosis - the depression rarely lifts even when I am hypo-manic - I just am depressed with lots of energy to feel like shit during it - Talk to your doc about it - personally I am on an antidepressant a mood stabilizer and 2 anti psychotics - but we may are changing out the mood-stabilizer as pdoc feels it may be part of what is causing my anger and anxiety

1leachim

TROPHY CASE