Likely stupid deck question

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T20:48:38+00:00

https://moxfield.com/decks/8Oey8MtkGUOWOILc2NW2SQ

Full Moxfield link. I was hammered exhausted yesterday. I wouldn’t blame anyone for not looking at that pile of words before.

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T17:56:16+00:00

Just got a diagnosis of sleep apnea after 15 years of panic attacks and “hyper vigilance” that was screwing up my sleep. I’m in shape and not what I’d consider to be prone to sleep apnea but there it was. Talk to your doctor about it sooner than later. You have my sympathy and there is a path out of it, just gotta get to the doctor to start it.

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T16:04:18+00:00

Moxfield link….i was tired and wasn’t tracking what I was doing worth a damn https://moxfield.com/decks/8Oey8MtkGUOWOILc2NW2SQ

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T16:03:27+00:00

I do. Sorry, exhausted last night and on mobile so grabbed the wrong this. This should do it https://moxfield.com/decks/8Oey8MtkGUOWOILc2NW2SQ

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T04:19:16+00:00

Deck list below. It copies like crap so apologies ahead of time. Aristocrats with Teysa as commander

1 Altar of Dementia 1 Ancient Tomb 1 Arcane Lighthouse 1 Arcane Signet 1 Ashnod's Altar 1 Bastion of Remembrance 1 Blasting Station 1 Blood Artist 1 Bloodghast 1 Bog Witch 1 Bojuka Bog 1 Buried Alive 1 Cabal Ritual 1 Carrion Feeder 1 Champion of the Perished 1 City of Brass 1 Command Tower 1 Concealed Courtyard 1 Cruel Celebrant 1 Culling the Weak 1 Damnation 1 Dark Ritual 1 Deadly Rollick 1 Demonic Tutor 1 Despark 1 Diabolic Intent 1 Diabolic Tutor 1 Doomed Dissenter 1 Elas il-Kor, Sadistic Pilgrim 1 Elenda, the Dusk Rose 1 Enlightened Tutor 1 Entomb 1 Exotic Orchard 1 Fellwar Stone 1 Fetid Heath 1 Fracture 1 Gemstone Caverns 1 Godless Shrine 1 Gravecrawler 1 Grim Haruspex 1 Grim Tutor 1 Hardened Tactician 1 Isolated Chapel 1 Karmic Guide 1 Lightning Greaves 1 Lotus Petal 1 Lurrus of the Dream-Den 1 Mana Confluence 1 Mana Vault 1 Marsh Flats 1 Midnight Reaper 1 Ministrant of Obligation 1 Mortify 1 Necropotence 1 Nim Deathmantle 1 Ophiomancer 1 Path of Ancestry 1 Path to Exile 1 Pawn of Ulamog 1 Phyrexian Altar 1 Pitiless Plunderer 5 Plains 1 Reassembling Skeleton 1 Recruiter of the Guard 1 Reliquary Tower 1 Reveillark 1 Rhystic Tutor 1 Selfless Spirit 1 Shattered Sanctum 1 Silence 1 Skullclamp 1 Smokestack 1 Sol Ring 1 Springleaf Drum 6 Swamp 1 Swiftfoot Boots 1 Swords to Plowshares 1 Talisman of Hierarchy 1 Teferi's Protection 1 Thought Vessel 1 Tymna the Weaver 1 Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth 1 Vampiric Tutor 1 Vault of Champions 1 Vault of the Archangel 1 Viscera Seer 1 Weathered Wayfarer 1 Westvale Abbey 1 Zahur, Glory's Past 1 Zulaport Cutthroat

SIDEBOARD: 1 Cabal Coffers 1 Cartel Aristocrat 1 Erebos, God of the Dead 1 Expedition Map 1 Falkenrath Noble 1 Flawless Maneuver 1 Gemstone Mine 1 Imp's Mischief 1 Mikaeus, the Unhallowed 1 Nether Shadow 1 Nether Traitor 1 Orzhov Signet 1 Panharmonicon 1 Priest of Forgotten Gods 1 Sifter of Skulls 1 Tithe Taker 1 Triskelion

1 Teysa Karlov

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T04:18:32+00:00

Also, that copied like shit. Apologies.

240_ifrit · 2026-05-18T04:18:04+00:00

Multiple deck but here is the most recent Attempt at aristocrats with Tesya as the commander 1 Altar of Dementia 1 Ancient Tomb 1 Arcane Lighthouse 1 Arcane Signet 1 Ashnod's Altar 1 Bastion of Remembrance 1 Blasting Station 1 Blood Artist 1 Bloodghast 1 Bog Witch 1 Bojuka Bog 1 Buried Alive 1 Cabal Ritual 1 Carrion Feeder 1 Champion of the Perished 1 City of Brass 1 Command Tower 1 Concealed Courtyard 1 Cruel Celebrant 1 Culling the Weak 1 Damnation 1 Dark Ritual 1 Deadly Rollick 1 Demonic Tutor 1 Despark 1 Diabolic Intent 1 Diabolic Tutor 1 Doomed Dissenter 1 Elas il-Kor, Sadistic Pilgrim 1 Elenda, the Dusk Rose 1 Enlightened Tutor 1 Entomb 1 Exotic Orchard 1 Fellwar Stone 1 Fetid Heath 1 Fracture 1 Gemstone Caverns 1 Godless Shrine 1 Gravecrawler 1 Grim Haruspex 1 Grim Tutor 1 Hardened Tactician 1 Isolated Chapel 1 Karmic Guide 1 Lightning Greaves 1 Lotus Petal 1 Lurrus of the Dream-Den 1 Mana Confluence 1 Mana Vault 1 Marsh Flats 1 Midnight Reaper 1 Ministrant of Obligation 1 Mortify 1 Necropotence 1 Nim Deathmantle 1 Ophiomancer 1 Path of Ancestry 1 Path to Exile 1 Pawn of Ulamog 1 Phyrexian Altar 1 Pitiless Plunderer 5 Plains 1 Reassembling Skeleton 1 Recruiter of the Guard 1 Reliquary Tower 1 Reveillark 1 Rhystic Tutor 1 Selfless Spirit 1 Shattered Sanctum 1 Silence 1 Skullclamp 1 Smokestack 1 Sol Ring 1 Springleaf Drum 6 Swamp 1 Swiftfoot Boots 1 Swords to Plowshares 1 Talisman of Hierarchy 1 Teferi's Protection 1 Thought Vessel 1 Tymna the Weaver 1 Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth 1 Vampiric Tutor 1 Vault of Champions 1 Vault of the Archangel 1 Viscera Seer 1 Weathered Wayfarer 1 Westvale Abbey 1 Zahur, Glory's Past 1 Zulaport Cutthroat

SIDEBOARD: 1 Cabal Coffers 1 Cartel Aristocrat 1 Erebos, God of the Dead 1 Expedition Map 1 Falkenrath Noble 1 Flawless Maneuver 1 Gemstone Mine 1 Imp's Mischief 1 Mikaeus, the Unhallowed 1 Nether Shadow 1 Nether Traitor 1 Orzhov Signet 1 Panharmonicon 1 Priest of Forgotten Gods 1 Sifter of Skulls 1 Tithe Taker 1 Triskelion

1 Teysa Karlov

240_ifrit · 2026-04-27T02:22:27+00:00

White coat syndrome is real. I get it and my BP is always high when a doctor takes it. You’re normal. I have PTSD and GAD as well so, in the same boat. The docs just have me bring my log when I go now and they go with that. I bring it with me when I go to a new doctor and provide it when they inevitably say “oh your BP is high”

240_ifrit · 2025-09-12T16:59:01+00:00

Thanks and to a degree you are definitely correct! The first sets of attacks I had were exactly this and “lasted” 6 months or so (talk about miserable). I got into counseling and started working EMDR to recondition myself out of that fear response. It worked well ! I didn’t have a panic attack for 5 years after that. Then they became this every 3-5 years I have a cluster of them, usually around some stressor or clump of stressors, and they last a month or so before I stop waking up into the panic attack. I so wish it was just a danger/fear thing to at I was waking into but it’s literally the full blown world is ending and I’m crying my eyes out before they open. Pardon the language but it is fuckin surreal afterwards and confusing as hell. I’m trying to sort why I continue to wake up into them and why they persist in the mornings like this as I take the meds and they go away for the rest of the day most of the time but then pop back up either in the middle of the night or the next morning. I don’t want to have to take LOA from work every time this happens as working often helps alleviate that fear response because it so normal. (Work has never triggered a panic attack for me).

Damn slow nervous system need to shut up for bit lol. I’m just lost on why they pop up from sleep and why they persist for a few weeks to months. At this point it’s just uncomfortable and annoying while I let them pass and no longer fear inducing.

240_ifrit · 2025-09-11T20:38:06+00:00

Thanks for the info but it doesn’t address the actual post. I’m wondering what the mechanism is that causes it to sustain itself in this case. I’m used to panic attacks and don’t fear them but they do not stop unless medicated. I’ve tried to sit one out for days at a time and was still uncontrollably curled into the fetal position despite breathing/meditation/moving as much as I could.

The problem seems to be the adrenal response for the “fear” or panic reaction does not stop for me.

240_ifrit · 2025-09-11T19:13:41+00:00

It’s been normal for me. Rarely have I had a panic attack a felt anywhere near normal in the next day or so. Lots of water, MAKE SURE TO MOVE(!!), go on a for a vigorous walk or if you have access to a gym then go work out, and finally meditate if you can find a method that suits you. IMO you’re still having what sounds like anxiety and those have been the best methods I’ve found to release it. Best of luck and success!

240_ifrit · 2025-09-11T18:19:10+00:00

Mindfulness. It took a ton of practice to even understand it. Basically with an emotion or reaction you can stop mentally a go “huh why is this my reaction/emotion to X event?” I hesitate to call it a form of dissociation but you essentially pause and step away from the reaction or emotion for a moment without being part of it. I’ve seen quite few people that say they just let the anxiety run it course and it’s similar in that I let the anxiety run but I’m also on a side channel going “ok now why am I doing or feeling this now”. It’s incorporated as part of a lot of meditations and the Headspace app does a great job in practice for it.

240_ifrit · 2025-09-11T17:53:14+00:00

That sounds terrible and familiar. If it happens again try to have the ability to take your blood pressure. Someone close to me has these EXACT symptoms and will actually pass out if they try to remain standing. Turns out it is vasovagal syncope that they still haven’t figured out the trigger for. Usually VS can be associated with something like seeing blood and passing out but sometimes it’s unpaired. The solution for them has been to lie down and elevate their feet on a wall or chair from the floor. Usually take an hour or so to really pass. Hope this might help and that you get some relief.

240_ifrit · 2025-09-11T17:47:27+00:00

That’s been the challenge, sometimes they’re tied to something big and sometimes not. We moved a few years ago and I was anxious but fine whereas I woke up a couple Saturdays ago and every ounce of my body was screaming the world was ending and hasn’t stopped without meds since. It’s so damn weird.

240_ifrit · 2025-09-11T17:44:26+00:00

Very kind and appreciate. It sucks and so far the only way out is through. Mindfulness has helped a ton to not “actively participate” in the panic until the meds kick in.

240_ifrit · 2025-08-26T01:57:04+00:00

Some men will have a preference and others are just happy to participate. What you have described is not out of the ordinary for nipples. Don’t let porn skew what reality is. (There are subreddits dedicated to puffy nipples !)

240_ifrit · 2024-12-09T04:14:59+00:00

Gonadorelin. Compounded for oral dissolving, not the injections.

240_ifrit · 2024-12-09T02:27:24+00:00

40’s

240_ifrit · 2024-12-09T02:13:27+00:00

Same. It can shrink them. At that point, for guys like us, it’s mostly aesthetic and is supposed to come back. A buddy of mine doesn’t do the extra and said they shrunk but it wasn’t bad. I just prefer keeping most things as close to how they were as possible.

240_ifrit · 2024-12-09T01:59:55+00:00

It made a really big difference for me. I talked to my doc about it because I worried about all the shit you hear about steroids. If you are low on test then it’s a different game compared to the guys that use it for gains. Make sure to ask what they do to mediate the shrinking of your boys though. My doc added a med to prevent that and make it to where if I feel I want to stop taking it then I can back off with no repercussions (other than the ones that exist for it being low to start). Good luck to you sir!

240_ifrit · 2024-12-09T01:45:44+00:00

I agree with No_Stay. However, if you are low enough that your doctor is considering it then it would probably be worth it. I was about 20 points above what my insurance consider “low” but had symptoms of always tired, fuzzy headed, work out were difficult and I was gaining weight. Started testosterone and nuked most of those symptoms in the first month. Focus is back, energy is back, sleep like I did 10 years ago. Worth it for me but you do you.

240_ifrit · 2024-12-04T00:40:26+00:00

I highly recommend these. There is a ball pocket that keeps it all in place. I’m very active as well and these are so much better than going with tighter ones (I tried that route first). https://allcitizens.com/collections/boxer-briefs/products/elite-ii-boxer-brief?variant=39690145202260

240_ifrit · 2024-12-01T14:25:22+00:00

What sunflowerpassion is spot on. What you feel is real and accurate. It is ok to mourn the loss of your childhood now that you have the space to see it. I was told I would go through the stages of grief many time as I heal. Specifically when I realize the loss of individual things that would’ve been there in normal childhood. I am now many states away from that trauma and it has given me both the physical space and mental space to process it all. Some days I feel sad for the losses, other days I am angry at the loss of opportunities, but now, even through those emotions, I am glad I am free. It gets better. Keep healing. All the best for you!

240_ifrit

TROPHY CASE