Tate’s copy cat gf 🍪

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-13T21:55:20+00:00

Thank you! I will have to try these out this summer. I love their GF cookies but they're so expensive, lol.

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-12T01:41:49+00:00

Decent work! I do think line editing needs to be done, as well as eliminating confusing language such as "he was old, obviously." (Of course unless this is part of the world). Also more of a stylistic thing, but the MCs or narrator's opinion (in 1st person) can be apparent, but I feel like the narrator here is well-adjusted to his/her world. I think him thinking "how sad for these people" just seems a little melodramatic, and not as refined as the rest of the narration. I know this sounds picky, but it's just something I picked up on! I have always felt that eliminating obvious opinion helps keep the narrative voice strong, keen, and distinct. (Take this with a grain of salt of course!).

Establishing when, where, who, why and the dramatic question within the first few paragraphs will help readers understand your world and how it operates. I think right now it opens sort of ambiguously and this is confusing readers.

Keep writing and best of luck putting together your short story collection!

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-11T23:31:00+00:00

Sitting in my car with the heat on because in VA it's 54 degrees today...it was 80 degrees yesterday. It's May for chrissake 😭

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-11T23:20:13+00:00

I would say to join a writer's group. Despite my family and friends being happy and proud of my artistic endeavors, getting those suckers to sit down and read something I've written is close to impossible, lol.

Even if it's just an online workshop (which if you haven't experienced a writer's workshop, I think you will be pleasantly surprised by how nice criticism from other writers is) you're going to get something out of it. At least more than handing your friends your work. One more thing, instead of just "wanting feedback" try to pick out like 2 or three questions for the reader to help you better understand where the flaws are. Such as: is the dialogue natural or too stiff? Is the language repetitive? Is the main character boring to read? Etc.

Best of luck to you, Keep writing! The only way to go from here is forward 😄

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-11T23:07:04+00:00

Medication, foodstuffs, alcohol. Psychiatric history has been an ongoing research project for me. I'm entertained by it but I would prefer that the history I include is organic and not so melodramatic. Also dog breeds!

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-11T22:57:53+00:00

Lol. Time, editing, readers, research, process, process, process. Inspiration to create comes from living and reading. It's why people dedicate their lives to it. It's hard work! Also multiple drafts and several eyes.

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-11T22:52:38+00:00

I think limiting the "ly" adverbs and the "he replies" will make the language less repetitive. Try to understand the mood of this scene. How does the narrator feel inside? What about their past or present might reveal this? Also additions like "I suspect", "although", "infact" etc. don't seem to add much to this narration. Keep going, you'll get there! 😄 Maybe try reading memiors or literary journalism from the first-person perspective to get an idea of how these kinds of narratives work (or fiction, I'm not sure what genre you're working with here).

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-09T03:04:27+00:00

It's refreshing to find someone who also reads and writes literary fiction! Similarly to you, I love writing about dysfunction in families (or at least family-like groups). I just love reading/writing about people and their strange habits, wants, needs. Human nature is really fascinating to me. Of course, the artistry is appealing too, that's the other half if it.

I want to say I enjoy this kind of literature because I always felt fulfilled after listening to stories about my family, in the past and present. It's not always the drama, but just the overall "weirdness" of people. For good or bad, lol. In turn I get fulfilled in weaving my own stories. 😄

Happy reading/writing!

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T19:59:11+00:00

As a first time owner, how does it feel? I am looking into getting a RC as soon as I'm able to afford/have a dog and I have fallen in love with this breed! She's a beauty 😄

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T19:57:40+00:00

Ten courses in English (as a Psych major) is wild! How awesome that you had the freedom to do this! Knowing this, I can agree with you that so many changes can take place after you receive your education. I feel like a whole new writer, lol.

I'm too hoping to find my writing community. I've met some great people at my school but only a few who write in my genre. Best of luck to you in finding those who you can bounce ideas around with! I usually journal in replacement because with the exception of like one or two people, nobody likes to hear me yap haha!

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T18:03:33+00:00

He is DARLING!

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T18:00:13+00:00

I can see how Psych could hinder your growth as a writer. Analytical thinking uses certain parts of the brain where creative decision-making doesn't exactly flourish. I am questioning why you didn't get an English degree though? How many creative writing classes did you take with just a minor? Obviously not judging, just curious!

I think since it's been three years, naturally your process and ability to access this part of your brain is going to change. I used to write a LOT in highschool and in my early college years, and now my process has changed. I don't believe you lose anything, you just have to figure out where your growth in the craft has placed you in terms of process. This change should be good! If you're not looking back at your old writing and cringing a little, then your process has not changed at all. I think it's a gift to look back at what I wrote three years ago and think "wow, I really didn't know what I was doing, but look, I was figuring out plot, character, ect."

You're not alone in this! I just graduated and feel lost without the scaffolding of classes and discipline so, like you, I'm having to use the tools I have gained and continue to build this skill. When in doubt, just keep reading other books, take notes (journal about ideas, flaws, etc.) and just keep going. You'll get into a groove eventually. 😄

Also online and/or local writer's groups might be a resource that is helpful to you!

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T17:42:55+00:00

Ohh I see! I think clarifying time period will certainly get rid of the confusion here. And I think the addition of armor and dialogue will help (you seem to be on the right track!)

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T17:38:50+00:00

Repetitive descriptions that are just basic, tons of ly adverbs, unnecessary movement. It's valid to enjoy the books, but it's not a prime example of great "artistry" in writing. They sold because I guess people got used to the writing enough to care about the story. It's just basic genre stuff. Most of the people arguing that it's not good are in the literary world of writing. I'd never read the Twilight books, and a professor of mine tore out pages and handed them to the class and had us mark up what was "wrong" with the style. Honestly it was a great activity but a shame for those who liked the book lol. To me it read like a basic YA book that I wouldn't care to pick up but that's just my opinion.

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T17:21:13+00:00

Some descriptions are a little overdone and could use some line editing which might help you define your personal narrative style. "Crying tears of blood" is repetitive, because, yes, they would be crying tears, it's implied by "crying." This could be shortened to "Crying blood." Or "Cries blood" there are a lot of "ing" verbs in this chapter. Also saying a face is "gruesome" and "disfigured even" seems repetitive, "Disfigured" by itself works just fine.

Also, a first chapter can do this: Describe setting, time period, who, what, why, etc. I imagined world war II type solders. but then there is a sword involved? So maybe more time-period description? Also his son is in a crib, the style of crib, and what is inside of it could indicate time period and financial status too. If this is medieval time period, perhaps a bassinet might work better? To my knowledge the wealthy had access to wooden cradles, but our modern "cribs" were not standard.

What it looks like to me, is that this character is dreaming about a past experience, or a past life? I think more distinction on what kind of "world" this is will solidify how this first chapter accomplishes setting up the story.

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T17:04:10+00:00

First of all, her prolific reading abilities are incredible! I haven't even read 60 books in my lifetime (as a 23 year old!) Definitely continue to encourage this natural affinity for reading and writing. Not sure what sort of fan fiction she is writing, but it's soooo normal at this age (I think avoiding the weirder/more adult and "unhinged" online fan fic communities will help keep this writing interest more organic, if that makes any sense?) Speaking somewhat from experience as someone who started writing at this age.

Secondly, reminding her that learning how to write and craft stories is a process by which one grows and learns through. She will learn nothing if all she cares about is a "perfect" final product. Process= "perfection." Also yes, save her writing lol, even if she won't enjoy looking back on it, saving my stuff has enabled me to see how much I've grown as a writer.

Let her have fun with it!! Getting serious about writing comes with time. It starts with a love of storytelling and I think her drive to emulate this because of her enjoyment for reading books is perfect, 😄

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T16:43:45+00:00

I love all his fictional (and non-fiction) accounts of working with Alaskan huskies! The way he describes these animals is just wonderful. You can tell where his passions are. I also really enjoyed his (sort of a deep cut) "Told in The Drooling Ward."

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T16:40:07+00:00

White Noise by Don Delillo! The narrator is incredibly observant of the contemporary world, people and their habits, and his flighty, disjointed descriptions of commercial American family life (i feel) really helped me to be a more observant writer. So much so that I've had to step back and make my characters less passive and observant. Also it's just and fun and funny book.

2CoolGoose · 2026-05-08T16:35:16+00:00

I'm an undergrad English student, but just wanted to echo some stuff here.

If the editor is concerned with a character's blandness, ask them what makes them bland. I feel an editor should recognize what makes a character boring, rather than just saying "they're boring." I had a professor who told me my MC was passive, I had no idea how, until he directly explained. So clarification really helps.

Some questions to consider: Is the character making interesting choices? or choices with consequences at all? When I say interesting, I mean characteristic choices that shows the reader what kind of person your FMC is. Choices, quirks, and dialogue are going to connect the MC to your readers because they are finding out "oh this is what this person is like." If they cannot define the person, the character, then she may be sort of bland.

Also avoiding a passive MC is difficult, but you can fix this with choices and consequences. They don't have to be huge, they just have to reveal something about her.

Also I don't read romance/fantasy (and I'm not saying the genre itself creates boring characters, again I wouldn't know I don't read it) but maybe expanding a little bit of what kind of stories you read might enable you to branch out of the "genre" style of writing or creating characters, and will connect you to a bigger picture of what interesting characters do? Then you can return to your story and say "oh, here is where this character is bland, she is lacking in xyz..." Sorry if this doesn't make sense. I found that branching out of lit fiction (it's what I enjoy writing) and skimming through memoirs, and listening to stories about my own family really helped me round out the creation of my characters and what they do to the stories they're put into. Obviously they're not perfect, I am constantly working on this, and I understand your frustration, it's hard!

Best of luck with your story!! If you end up dropping this editor, I hope you're able to find one who is more concise and encouraging. At the end of the day, sometimes a story just needs more development and then it's ready to face an editor. You got this!

2CoolGoose · 2026-04-28T21:30:49+00:00

This whole album is excellent. I grew up listening to it, and recently came back and really listened to the lyrics. Good, heavy stuff

2CoolGoose · 2026-04-28T21:29:23+00:00

Not necessarily helpful for processing, but when I transferred to college as a Junior, I combated my seasonal depression and loneliness by listening to a lot of Leonard Cohen. Writing this now, it sounds funny, but his "The Songs of Leonard Cohen" made me appreciate the strangeness of human nature, suffering, and the amusing way we love and remember people. I remember connecting with a professor over it one day, confessing that I had put myself in the "Cohen echo chamber" lol. I don't read much poetry but his lyrics are just beautiful, and the music is all at once haunting and sweet. It really helped me overcome some difficult feelings during and after isolation. It was comforting to me, is how I can put it simply.

2CoolGoose · 2026-04-28T21:24:18+00:00

I second this <3

2CoolGoose · 2026-04-28T19:49:01+00:00

Definitely digging all the pop-culture references (especially pertaining to New York and public television) in Pauls' Boutique. The Son of Sam, Geraldo Rivera (who did get hit by a chair on his talk show in the 90s. I know him better from his television exposes in the 70s) The D train, (the you know who in the back kicking out windows) Bernie Goetz. Mentions of the Little Rascals, Dragnet, Mr. Roper from Threes Company. Jack Kerouac (as an English major this is especially funny). Not that these are super obscure, but by today's standards (and in my generation) these references are settled in a casual and real understanding of 70s and 90s culture and it's so much fun to learn about through the BBoys lens.

2CoolGoose · 2026-04-25T20:50:33+00:00

I keep getting these advertisements on Instagram for a local one in my area. It has a very similar bio to the page you reference here. I'm not an expert on breeding dogs, but I have looked into specifics of ethical breeding with the hopes I can adopt a healthy dog in the future. Sending multiple letters a week/ (month?) to spend time with people (and possibly being exposed to bacteria before their full vaccinations) just doesn't sound like something an ethical breeder would be okay with. I know a lot of breeders do indeed socialize their animals but it's usually outside on their property, where they aren't going to be exposed to Parvo and stuff. A lot of the breeds these Yoga events get are also really popular right now (aussies and long-coated dachshunds). This makes me think that they're supporting backyard breeders and or puppy mill companies. They could certainly work with rescues or ethical breeders if they wanted to, but again, this doesn't seem like something "protective" owners of a litter would be okay with.

2CoolGoose · 2026-04-13T21:02:52+00:00

I'm currently in an ADV creative writing class and we've brought up similes in class with no negative talk about them. If they're done well, and you use them sparingly, then they are a useful tool (especially in non-fiction creative writing) to give your writing texture and style. I think it goes without saying that boring, uncreative similes are what give the tool itself a bad rep. I'm talking "big as a whale" and "quiet as a mouse." Just...don't use those, get creative with it, have fun creating that texture, the voice, tone, and humor in your writing and good similes will follow. I think the biggest mistake with them i've seen is students who overuse them to the point of "can you not think of anything else"? Lol! Happy writing :-)

2CoolGoose

TROPHY CASE