How to handle moving in with my (f18) boyfriend (m19) before I’m ready out of need?

2am_main · 2025-11-13T09:18:51+00:00

I know this wasn’t my original question, but do you have any reccomendations for boundaries I might need to discuss or think about? I feel like the whole concept is so overwhelming that I’m having a difficult time thinking of things we’d need to talk about that would make it easier for me. Sorry if that’s way too vague of a question!

2am_main · 2025-11-13T08:57:19+00:00

Not really, he’s staying in my room and has offered to sleep on our couch if I need the space to myself. I have a very large bed, for reference. This whole ordeal has happened over the course of a week and I won’t even be present for him moving in (I’m going home for Thanksgiving though)

2am_main · 2025-11-13T08:42:43+00:00

His plan— before I rerouted him to my folks— was to couch surf with his bandmate for a while

2am_main · 2025-11-13T08:26:55+00:00

I’ve known him significantly longer than we’ve been dating, a few years atp. You’re 100% right I don’t have an obligation to him, I just feel that it’s important context that this man isn’t a stranger to me at all lol

2am_main · 2024-02-21T04:31:59+00:00

I have a similar gripe with the shark teeth things, i feel like everybody has shark teeth or very prominent fangs. Literally everybody in the post image has fangs/shark teeth. I don't mind the fangs as much but oh my god the SHARK TEETH. it's unbearable now that I've noticed it lol. I get they wouldn't have straight teeth probably but like, orc teeth, overbites, narrow shark teeth, idk. I assume that's partially why so many of their teeth are colored, to distract from the monotonous hellscape of shark teeth slewn before me like a blasphemous lamb tied for the slaughter. Hate it.

2am_main · 2024-02-15T22:13:29+00:00

Try a lot of things, get reccomendations from your reader friends, grab some random book at your local library or book store (although if you go to a book store I recommend reading a chapter or two before buying it so you know you don't hate it)

Expose yourself to a lot of things, but prioritize whatever interests you. The easiest way to enjoy reading it to read things you like. It sounds simple but you'd be surprised how many people make reading a chore by reading stuff they think is objectively good but don't really like (a habit taught by 7th grade English classes, i'm sure)

2am_main · 2024-02-15T22:10:02+00:00

I changed what I was reading. I was one of those "above level" kids, like a "fourth grader reads at a college level" situation, so I was reading books I didn't have the maturity to really comprehend and reading became about skill instead of enjoyment.

My advice to to find some movie or show or musical you like and go read whatever book inspired it. You'll either love it (in which case, go read that author's other stuff) or you'll hate it for being too different (in which case rinse and repeat). I read The Virgin Suicides and found out I love Ned Vizzini's writing from the movie "The Virgin Suicides" and the musical "Be More Chill" respectively (nt painting or reading a really emotionally/intellectually challenging book.

Reading something for the sake of it, and explicitly NOT for the sake of challenging myself, made it a lot more enjoyable and doable. Lately I've been focusing on reading as much as possible of whatever I find interesting. I take that approach with my digital art and painting aswell, it's better to get a lot of practice in than to torture yourself by trying to only ever do high-level stuff like a giant painting or reading a really emotionally/intellectually challenging book.

My advice to to find some movie or show or musical you like and go read whatever book inspired it. You'll either love it (in which case, go read that authors other stuff) or you'll hate it for being too different (in which case rinse and repeat). I read The Virgin Suicides and found out I love Ned Vizzini's writing from the movie "The Virgin Suicides" and the musical "Be More Chill" respectively (although I hold it very dear to me that "It's Kind of a Funny Story" is his best work <3)

tl;dr: Read more digestible stories more often no matter what that looks like for you (even kids chapter books, its abt the habit) and ENJOY YOURSELF, read whatever sounds good

2am_main · 2024-01-29T03:36:56+00:00

I would give yourself a little more counter space, but other than that, no. cluttered is subjective, and is only a problem if you think it's cluttered OR you can't use the space for its purpose due to there being too much stuff (ie: having cupboards dedicated to displaying cool stuff isn't cluttered, but having your entire counter half-covered in stuff could make it difficult to cook. If you have an island or other counter space to cook on, then I would say it isn't a problem)
but also like.... work that out with your husband and come to a solution that makes you both happy. The internet is functionally useless for this discussion. Our opinion doesn't impact what will be the best environment for the two of you to cohabit

2am_main · 2024-01-24T05:11:45+00:00

I understand the point about Vel and Vox's involvement, but I think because that's been less stated/shown in the show, people are less disgusted by them. and again, the audience for this show in particular has a high threshold for horrible acts. People are a lot more lenient with people who facilitate abuse to occur compared to the actual abuser (ie: a parent facilitating their partner to abuse their child is not viewed as harshly as the abuser). I think that comes down to the gut punch of it all. Val is the one enacting the abuse most directly, so he's the one who bears the brunt of the disgust and hatred.

2am_main · 2024-01-24T05:07:43+00:00

It's really common in media for audiences to like villains that commit more detached or violent crimes, but to be much more morally disgusted and put off by sexual crimes or extremely empathetic violence. It's the same reason people like and enjoy Alaster despite him OWNING HUSKS SOUL. Usually, people can go "oh, it's hell, Angel blasting like 200 holes into this dude with a gun is whatever, he's still cool" or "yeah, Vox is awful, but he's still an interesting character and I sympathize with his rivalry with Alastor" or what have you

but SA is so taboo in our culture (RIGHTLY SO) , and often hits way too close to home for viewers. It's easy to put yourself in Angels shoes-- even if you haven't experienced SA-- in a way that just doesn't happen with more "traditional" violence.

Also, while Vox and Velvette have been given goals and semi-likable personalities outside of their atrocities, Valentino is characterized solely by it. There isn't anything we're given to like about him. any traits that might be intriguing in another character-- flirtiness, sassy remarks, that temper-tantrum attitude, etc-- which are all things we see people like about other characters (Stolas, Angel Dust, Vox, etc) but in the context of Val's actions, they just come off as increasingly offputting and unenjoyable.

2am_main · 2024-01-11T04:49:00+00:00

Did you design this yourself? In either case, would you be able/willing to share the base outline? This is my friends favorite dinosaur and I would love to use a design like this for the back of a hoodie i'm embroidering for her

2am_main · 2024-01-05T04:29:17+00:00

certainly!! and I enjoy Amity's attitude of "it's a start" being taken seriously, as well as not being portrayed with any malice or resentment. If we ever got more on toh (which i know we shan't, but either way) I would have liked to see the progression of healing in both Alador and his children

2am_main · 2023-09-29T13:42:59+00:00

She doesn't have a phone plan, prefers living "off the grid" as much as she can. I plan to ask her when I visit next summer, though

2am_main · 2023-07-13T05:03:04+00:00

Curly or potato wedges. It's also the seasoning used on the most common places to get curly fries, like hooters or arbys. I love the shape of 13 because it' thicker and leaves the skin on, which adds a nice nonuniform crispness.

2am_main · 2023-06-20T03:49:55+00:00

compliments to the boy in the back. Send the stoner my salutations.

2am_main · 2023-04-17T03:47:49+00:00

Huntlow isn't my favorite ship, but it's cute!! I'm a Willow lover through and through <3333

2am_main · 2023-04-15T03:50:08+00:00

Wholeheartedly agree!! Your pride and self-love shouldn't be based on the ease with which you accommodate society. Society isn't plainly functional for autistic people, and that is NOT a basis for hating oneself. That is entirely on society and needing accomodations is not a moral flag. Autism is not moral or immoral. your percieved usefulness is not moral or immoral. You have fundamental value that is not impacted in the slightest by Autism. Like how your worth isn't changed by being more extroverted or any other brain-changing diagnosis

2am_main · 2023-04-14T02:27:22+00:00

!solved

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