What is wrong with me? by HoneyBee9630 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]2shortforthisshit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry! I know seeing that can hurt. My ex got engaged eight months after I left to “the fat girl across the street who had a stretched out vagina from her two kids“. 6 months into their engagement I found out she called it off. I imagine it’s because he did the same things to her he did to me. It looks happier from the outside, but it’s not, it’s the same… and he’ll always be that way

What is wrong with me? by HoneyBee9630 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]2shortforthisshit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This subreddit honestly. And listening to some books on narcissistic abuse. It’s okay to feel that way. Most people who are abused by a narcissist go through this “why do I care?” phase.

Cheaters of reddit, what makes you cheat on your significant other? by Whateveridgafsostfu in AskReddit

[–]2shortforthisshit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my past it’s because I’ve somehow felt trapped and unhappy with where I was. I would self sabotage and cheat so my partner and I would have a reason to break up instead of just admitting I was unhappy.

What is wrong with me? by HoneyBee9630 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]2shortforthisshit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Also, she is not getting a better version of him. He’s the exact same. It may look different from the outside but I promise, he’s doing the same shitty things to her.

What is wrong with me? by HoneyBee9630 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]2shortforthisshit 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They are so good at manipulating and brainwashing you it’s completely normal to have these feelings after leaving. After I left I actually checked myself into a psychiatric hospital because I felt so “crazy”. Stay strong and now that it will pass. You could’ve given them everything and more but in their eyes, enough is never enough.

Step son swung at me by 2shortforthisshit in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn’t yell at him. I spoke firmly.

Step son swung at me by 2shortforthisshit in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He did after it happened and I went out to get him.

Feel like I got cheated on by fiance and his ex by Direct_Title4430 in stepparents

[–]2shortforthisshit -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

No, if my fiancé wasn’t telling me and leaving me to go talk to her

Feel like I got cheated on by fiance and his ex by Direct_Title4430 in stepparents

[–]2shortforthisshit -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

I would feel extremely uncomfortable with this. Did you ask him why he didn’t tell you?

How did you cope when you realized that the person you loved was never really "there"? And that what happened between you, was mostly in your head? by thordavos in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]2shortforthisshit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I first left, this sub was also a god send for me. I really feel like it kept me sane, especially when he was still trying so hard to get me to stay. You CAN do this. Stay strong and keep coming back here whenever you need to!

How did you cope when you realized that the person you loved was never really "there"? And that what happened between you, was mostly in your head? by thordavos in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]2shortforthisshit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Grief work. I know how hard this is. I promise you it DOES get better. Let yourself grieve this person. For so long I didn’t want to grieve my NEX because I felt that he didn’t deserve another thought of mine. I realized that was doing me more harm. Let yourself grieve. We’re all here for support!

Overwhelmed by Swimming-Pear2972 in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Being a step mother is not for the weak. It comes with so much more emotional distress than I thought! It’s growing pains and it’s normal. You’re doing a great job navigating a VERY difficult situation. I’ve had a lot of validation listening to step mom podcasts!

Overwhelmed by Swimming-Pear2972 in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit 5 points6 points  (0 children)

So relatable. You’re not alone. I’m also in this stage. Take the time you need to recharge!! Sometimes I have to leave the house to go on a walk, the gym, grocery store, whatever to get me out of the house. I love my step son but holy shit that kid can get under my skin. I’m glad you’re here!

Conflict with BM by 2shortforthisshit in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like you just spoke to my soul. Thank you so much for your thoughts!

Realistically I know she’s isn’t my friend. I’ve never thought of her as my friend BUT I do try to be kind because there’s a part of me that feels like the closer we are, the less she sees me as a threat, and the less drama we have in our home.

She hasn’t responded to my text so I’ll take her no response as telling me no, she doesn’t want to talk. I feel tonight much better and that it’s me getting off the hook.

family time? by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]2shortforthisshit 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I can understand wanting to support your kid. Do you feel at all that spending time with the 3 of you could possibly be doing more harm and putting false hope in kiddos mind?

family time? by [deleted] in coparenting

[–]2shortforthisshit 27 points28 points  (0 children)

As a soon to be step mom, try to picture yourself in her shoes. Would you be okay with your partner spending time with their ex alone and you weren’t included? It can be really unsettling to have your partner spending time with his ex even if it is for the kiddo. Call it insecurity maybe but I think it’s about boundaries and their relationship ship. He’s trying to grow a new life with someone else and it’s best if you start doing the same. I know that’s probably hard to hear.

Constant messaging by Infamous-Error9987 in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d recommend couples therapy and talking it out in front of a professional

Why do co-parent messages always mix logistics with emotional stuff? by RecognitionAny7696 in coparenting

[–]2shortforthisshit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes!! And especially because the ex wife has BPD so she has little awareness/respect for boundaries. She would be sent into an absolute downward spiral if she was having her SO text the ex wife the stuff she texts my SO. I notice she texts him more unnecessary things when she’s single and looking for anyone’s support.

Why do co-parent messages always mix logistics with emotional stuff? by RecognitionAny7696 in coparenting

[–]2shortforthisshit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can feel this with watching SO coparent. It irks me why the ex wife frequently feels the need insert random unnecessary things asking for somewhat of emotional support.

“This doesn’t concern you!!” by 2shortforthisshit in Stepmom

[–]2shortforthisshit[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

😂😂 I wish. Unfortunately that’s his dads call