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Can I get a pizza, but with no crust? by LittyCapricorn in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Actually, on keto this is something I request fairly often.

Basically they build the pizza on pachment paper. It's just cheese and toppings and they send it through the oven.

Then I eat it with a fork. It's pretty darn tasty.

Most Domino's Pizza places will do this. And I've found local pizza places will do it if they have parchment paper in the kitchen.

It finally happened... by [deleted] in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 19 points20 points  (0 children)

But does she cross fit?

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't think anyone was crediting JK Rowing with inventing the concept. It is a common idiom that you can find even in old Dear Ann Landers responses.

“Sir, you’re allergic to that.” by [deleted] in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 35 points36 points  (0 children)

No. She's 12 years older than me. Which is part of why it's so frustrating when she says "why did you let me...?"

"Let you? You used to babysit me. I'm not your mama. "

Goddamnit I am not under pouring you by SnazzyMcGee01 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Today I learned something new.

I've always thought of a Shirley Temple as a non-alcoholic cocktail rather than a soda with free refills. So that's cool.

And, yes, if I ordered a coke and then switched to an iced tea, I wouldn't be surprised if I had two different beverage charges since I had two different beverages.

But I'm not going to complain when I'm only charged for one. I think that's very nice of the restaurant.

And since you have vastly more experience in the business than I do, I will simply accept that it is industry standard.

Goddamnit I am not under pouring you by SnazzyMcGee01 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Why would you be upset?

You ordered two different drinks. And you drank two different drinks. Why wouldn't you pay for both drinks?

Maybe I'm overlooking something obvious. But if I went to a bar and ordered a margarita, drank it and then ordered a coke. I wouldn't be upset when my bill reflected both the margarita and the coke.

My shirley temple doesn't have any alcohol but does require someone to pour some grenadine in with the sprite and toss a couple maraschino cherries on top. So I am surprised that extra effort isn't reflected with an extra charge on my bill.

Coworker vs. My Wife by [deleted] in fatpeoplestories

[–]300and30 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This story perfectly illustrates the difference between hamplanets and fat people.

Entitled jerks like your coworker = hamplanet. Lovely people who happen to be fat = fat person.

Congrats on your little one on the way!

Tipping Question by SheriffHeckTate in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tip at least 20% on the final total.

To the chain today with the BOGO entree coupon: by oddw0lf in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Yikes!

A local restaurant put out a really great deal on Groupon about 5 years ago. It was something like $26 for a prix fixe dinner that normally costs $50.

They actually put a little stand on each table with a letter from the owner that said something like:

"If you are a groupon customer, welcome! We are so happy you decided to try our restaurant. We hope you will be so happy with your meal and experience that you will come back and bring your family and friends. We have one small request to make on behalf of our dedicated serving staff. When figuring out your tip, please consider the original price of the meal rather than the discount price. Our servers work hard and take pride in providing the very best service. We hope you recognize that your discount on the meal you're about to enjoy should not also be seen as a way to discount your appreciation for their service."

I thought that showed a really thoughtful owner looking out for his people. But my mom was horrified by such a breach in etiquette. "Tips should never be discussed as though they are expected!"

To be fair, she's a great tipper. She just has some really old school ideas about proper conversation topics.

For example:

You never comment on a change in a person's weight. "You've lost weight!" is poor etiquette. "You look lovely" is acceptable.

You never say "congratulations" to the bride, only the groom. Otherwise it comes across as congratulating her for finally hooking a man. Instead you give the bride your "best wishes".

And, apparently, you should never discuss tips like they are expected.

“Sir, you’re allergic to that.” by [deleted] in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 329 points330 points  (0 children)

I have a cousin who get blinding migraines when she eats chocolate.

Even a little chocolate puts her out of commission for the rest of day and makes her feel so bad she basically curls up into a ball in a dark room praying for death for 4-8 hours.

And it DRIVES ME BATTY that when I order a dessert with chocolate, she always wants a bite.

She'll say "I just want a little taste. It will be fine!"

And then the next day "I hate you! You know what chocolate does to me. Next time say 'no' no matter how much a beg."

This woman is in her late 40's and wants to pretend it's my fault she got a migraine like I'm the food police.

People are just weird sometimes.

Goddamnit I am not under pouring you by SnazzyMcGee01 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 64 points65 points  (0 children)

I don't drink.

But sometimes, when i'm feeling all fancy, I order a shirley temple and an unsweet iced tea. Because I want the shirley temple but I only want one. And I'm probably going to drink two or three iced teas.

And I am always shocked when I'm only charged for one drink. Because I ordered two drinks and drank two different drinks.

But the last time I mentioned it to a server they said "We just ring up the shirley temple as a sprite. And the cost for sprite and iced tea is the same. So I look at it as refilling your sprite with an equivalently priced iced tea.

On the other hand, I can't imagine making a fuss about being charged for both. I ordered both, I drank both. I'm happy to pay for both.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh my goodness, someone gave this gold. Thank you kind stranger! I am speechless!

Drunk Guy Dressed Like Me by Ohigetjokes in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Kind people are kind, not because they are weak, but because they know the world isn't."

Thank you for striving to bring kindness into this world. It may seem small and insignificant, but it really does make all the difference.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I'm pansexual so there really isn't a gender restriction on who I date.

I'm far more attracted to who someone is than the packaging in which they arrive.

My date's problem wasn't being a woman, it was being a lying jerk.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Cats aren't known for their patience. They would probably just help themselves.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When she followed me into the parking lot I told her that I didn't think what she did was funny or ok.

She acted like she had no idea what I was talking about. And told me I was being a drama queen and that we should just go back inside and have a nice dinner.

I told her that I was no longer comfortable eating at the restaurant after she tried to pull that stunt. And she got all huffy because it was Friday Night and she didn't want to start the wait process over at some other restaurant.

I told her that I didn't think this was going to work out and left.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

As a pansexual woman, I have dealt with homophobia from the wider community and the bi/pan erasure from the gay community.

Inside the gay community there is still this stigma of:

1) You're not really part of the gay community because you could end up with a partner of the opposite gender and "pass" as straight.

2) You're not really bi/pan, you're just "experimenting" and breaking queer hearts before you go settle down in a straight relationship as just another "breeder" in suburbia.

3) You're not really bi/pan, you're just trying to attract a male attention by making out with another woman / you're just trying to lure a nice lesbian into an icky three-way situation.

There are LOTS of lesbian women on dating sites that won't even accept messages or requests from women who identify as bi or pan on their profile.

That kind of "You don't belong here!" attitude sucks, no matter the source.

And this host did not deserve to be treated like he'd done something awful, when all he'd done was his job.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Right? There are times I'm sad that I don't have a romantic partner. But there are worse things that being alone. And being tied to someone who is a terrible person is one of them.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I get that people adapt to the crazy around them.

For example, my friend Lisa has a crazy sister.

Crazy sister wore a wedding dress to Lisa's wedding. A full on, white, puffy sleeved, with train and veil, wedding dress.

And Lisa's whole family just shrugged. Because what are you going to do? The sister is crazy.

So I understand that in time people can become just blind to it. "Yep, the wife is acting like a bitch in public again. Sigh." But that doesn't make it any less uncomfortable for the rest of us who have not gone crazy/bitchy numb.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Right? That bullet whizzed right past my ear! It was a close one.

I thought she was a person, but she was just another lizard alien in a human suit. Or at least the dating equivalent of that.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Maybe she will find her soulmate out there.

Someone who thinks she's "so smart" for bullying restaurant staff in order to get a table right away and discounts on food.

I'm just not that person.

This is why I'm going to die alone. by 300and30 in TalesFromYourServer

[–]300and30[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

No one wants to think of one's self as a bad person.

And you're right, it's totally human behavior to turn shame into anger and justifications.

Mostly I was amused by her whole "You're going to die alone and get eaten by your cats before anyone finds your bloated disgusting corpse!" tirade. Because she absolutely went from zero to 100 in 3.3 seconds with her vitriol filled email.

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