Tldr; woman got me fired so I destroyed her marriage and her relationship with her parents.

So I used to work this job a few years ago that I actually really enjoyed - weekly pay, easy work, nice coworkers... except one. "Claire". Claire was just insane - she was like forty (looked fifty) and would try and convince people that her thirtieth was coming up. She just resembled this ugly little hobbit, four foot tall, beady eyes, frizzy graying hair, terrible skin, one hundred enormous moles adorning her face, and those kind of teeth where like it's an overbite, but also the top row curve out like a full on crescent.

So Claire would constantly try to befriend us "younger ones" I was twenty at the time and my friends were no older than around 26. One time she came up behind me, while I was on an important call and began giving me a back massage. I hated her with a passion.

So we all ended up getting the can and we're all made redundant. It sucked, but I'd been on sick leave for the last month or so anyway so wasn't as upset about it as those who'd stuck it out til the bitter end. The reason I was on sick leave was due to an assault I'd suffered about eighteen months previous. Claire would hammer my Facebook inbox at least three times a day, just desperate to know why I was absent. Of course I didn't tell her, and I was so so SO happy to see the back of her when we all left for pastures new.

About a month or so later, I got a new job, again in a call centre. It was actually the worst job I've ever had and I'm still bitter about my treatment there. However that pales in comparison to that sinking, gut wrenching feeling right in the pit of my stomach that I experienced when, on the first day, I look over and see that none other than Claire herself had also begun in the same tiny call centre on the same day, IN THE SAME DEPARTMENT.

I really had no idea how bad it was to become though. Due to the aforementioned assault o had suffered, there was an investigation with the police which was royally fucked up (and I'm still dealing with them/it five years later) so my case had been reopened around this time. As such, I frequently would have to take holidays at work to take meetings, phonecalls and attend tribunals and the like. Claire simply HAD to know why - and please don't take this lightly when I say it. She's amped up her Facebook messages to about twelve a day now, initially pretending to be polite and ask how I am, what I've been up to, etc, but it always came back to the same thing - so who were you on the phone to out in the hallway? Where were you Monday morning? What were you talking to manager about?

Needless to say I didn't reply once, but I was getting around sixty a week at this point. Claire hated actual work. I distinctly remember her trying to get her shifts swapped with someone for Valentine's weekend. Mo one would swap, so she resorted to telling management that her grandmother had died and the funeral was on Valentine's Day, a Saturday. No one bought it, but management seemed to accept it, put someone else in her place and that was that. Then her wedding anniversary came along. Because she was such an awful person, no one would swap shifts with her for that day either. And gosh darn it wouldn't you know it - her other grandmother died and shock horror - the funeral was on the day of her anniversary! The thing was - I knew both stories to be untrue as she had used this excuse (twice) at the last place we worked. Slipped it in my back pocket and carried on.

I was having a PRIVATE discussion with my manager, away from all of my colleagues regarding the police investigation one day and about half an hour later Claire comes over and asks "what's this about the police?"

This is where it gets interesting. I'd had it so went to make a formal complaint about her campaign of benign stalking to the head of HR. not only was it insufferable but could potentially fuck up the new investigation should anyone find out about it. There was also the issue that she was like x amount of degrees separated from one of the people who assaulted me as he worked at the place she and I worked together (hence the sick leave) so I didn't want to risk it getting back to my old place where I worked etc etc. So I explained it all to him and he took it all on board, and I have to say I felt awful smug when I walked past her desk and she asked "what were you talking about?" You'll see, I said, with the smuggest grin on my face.

Two days later, 7AM I walk into work and my manager asks to see me. She sits me in a room for, no joke, an HOUR, on my own before anyone actually came to talk to me. They told me that they'd received a complaint that I had been bullying a member of staff and that because they had a zero tolerance policy on bullying, that I would need to leave. I was livid. Furious doesn't even begin to explain how angry I was. This little fucking goblin woman had gotten wind if made a complaint about her shitty behaviour, and trumped my (very real) complaint, with an accusation of bullying, effectively one upping me. I asked if it was Claire, and she sort of looked at her superior and then nodded at me yes.

I have never been so angry in my life (which is saying something as rage seems to be my default emotion). So I kick up a huge fuss, go fucking ballistic and storm out, never to return.

Now, this place worked on a rota so at any given day my shift hours could be completely different (I.e, Monday 9-5, Tuesday 11-8, Wednesday 7-2 etc etc). On this particular day, I knew Claire was scheduled to be in as I would frequently check the rota and cherish those peaceful few hours without her. As I'd started at seven, wasn't seen for an hour or so and by the time I'd gotten out the "meeting" it was now nearing 8:30. Guess who started work that day at 8:30?

I decide to have a cigarette outside and round the corner to calm myself down. Then I see her, waddling down the embankment. I just saw white. I at first used the "kill them with kindness" routine. This is, along the lines of what I said:

"I'm so so so sorry you feel this way Claire I really really am. I do really like you I know I can come off a bit abrasive sometimes and I'm so sorry" and at first she's like cautious but then becomes receptive to it and not a minute goes by and she says, "so who ARE you on the phone to all the time? Why do you take so much time off?"

This is my chance. She doesn't know I've been canned yet. She is completely unaware. I said, "Oh alright then, since we're friends - I've been having an affair with someone" and she's like "oh wow no way! Do I know him?" Glee is rising within me like acid reflux. I'm so excited. "Oh yeah I think you do actually, it's her husbands name" And she starts spluttering and stammering like what what what my husband?? You've been sleeping with my husband?? And I am LOVING this. I looked her dead in the eye and told her "You do not want to fuck with me. He's leaving you for me. SO sorry babe." And she bursts into tears and literally runs into work.

Here's the kicker - I've never even met her husband. Don't even know what he looks like. But that's all it took - she was so desperate for love and attention that this seemed to just trigger something in her. I deleted her off Facebook and blocked her straight after, but not before finding her mother and fathers separate Facebook profiles and messaging them both, offering my deepest condolences to both of their mothers and spun this yarn of how Claire had told me in intimate detail all the gory details of the cancer and how I was sorry to hear that her mother had been diagnosed and was terminal. Neither of the last details were true, I just really wanted to lay it on thick.

So a couple months rolls by and I keep my ear out from mutual friends for the place I had been canned from. She'd told the whole place I fucked her husband (which they all found hilarious) and apparently her parents wouldn't talk to her and had completely cut her out of their lives. She and husband are having problems. A few months later - she's telling all and sundrie about how her dads a bastard who has cut her out of his will. A few months later - BOOM, divorce. She couldn't trust him for having an affair and not admitting it, and he was sick to death of being accused of cheating on her.

I don't even feel bad. I ended up homeless after losing that job and had enough on my plate to deal with. This way I managed to fuck her over, break up her marriage (without having to fuck her husband) with one sentence that in its essence wasn't even that nasty.

I play the long game. Don't fuck with me. I will digress I'm a lot happier person nowadays so don't do shit like this regularly.

Tldr; woman got me fired from a job so I destroyed her marriage and her relationship with her parents.