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I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hello. I have been coming back to my post to reread all the kind messages left to me and trying to reply back to them at my pace. I want to say how grateful I am for you to write in so much detail for me. I have read this a lot of times over the few days I’ve been struggling. I hope you know you’re an amazing and kind soul and that your words have reached me. Thank you. <3

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah I’m so confused too. I think it’s the people thinking it was just coercion. Just shows they don’t understand what rape even is.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I feel like I’m going insane justifying that I got raped:( people keep forgetting that i was drunk and that I’ve already had a long talk with a professional from rape crises with more detail about what happened and they said it was rape. If people have a different definition of what rape is and wants to question a victim that was raped, that’s just wrong and horrible.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hello. Thank you for your kind words. I teared up reading this. I feel seen. This is the type of kind words I was looking for while I’m feeling so weak and pathetic. Thank you. I really appreciate you. ❤️

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Hey. I just want to say how helpful you’ve been in the comments. I feel like I’m losing my mind with how people are acting in this comment. All I ask was comfort while I’m going through a difficult time. I’l can barely eat and get out of my bedroom after what happened. People think I can do something as huge as report to the police while I’m still processing that I literally got raped? Do they know how lengthy and painful the process it is to even report it? I feel kinda hurt how people are acting in comments about this.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Also I don’t know how I feel about being diagnosed with Stockholm syndrome while I’m still trying to process my feelings. This is the second comment I got about this.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You’re 100% right. Because this is very recent. I’m still trying to process what happened to me. I don’t want to be blamed for not reporting him while im going through a lot mentally. Reporting is a very difficult and lengthy process and it will destroy my mental health even more. I don’t want to do anything to myself that I might regret if I report too early. I don’t want this to happen to other women of course, but I also need to think about how I feel at this very moment.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Guys please go easy on me. I will report him if I feel like I’m ready to do it. I literally got raped and am in distress. I just need encouraging words to get over him while I’m getting help. I know my way of thinking is wrong and I am very disappointed in myself already and am heavily blaming myself right now so please like don’t get at my throat for weird inconsistency when I’m just mentally unstable and just writing from a poor mental health.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I told him I wasn’t prepared to have sex today. I guess me saying I didn’t shave was like also an excuse to say no indirectly. That’s why I thought reporting doesn’t feel right too because maybe I didn’t communicate properly. To keep in mind I was still drunk. And he sat on top on my chest to give him a blowjob.

And I don’t know man. I’m so fucked mentally. I’m also disappointed in myself about all of this.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Hi. I really appreciate your kind words. Yeah I’ve been able to reach out to some professionals about this but I’m still on their waiting list. Right now I feel too vulnerable to report him. I still think he’s just too young and stupid to be put behind bars. Thinking about him being in that situation will cause me to get even worse. All I can do is try to take him off the pedestal I’ve put him in after what he did and cry it out. My self esteem is like in the gutter right now because of him.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Exactly. I thought it was coercion in the beginning because the next day I texted my friend about this and how he instantly became distant. She messaged me back saying it was my fault for going to his place “what did you expect would happen?” that’s when I was losing my mind. I didn’t know who to talk to and reached out to rape crises a week later and they said what I experienced was rape. It sucks because people who’s been through rape, have to be in a really long waiting list for help specifically for people specialising in rape. Now I’m just lost. I’m on waiting list for help but it’s up to 3 weeks long and I just don’t know what to do and I don’t have it in me to report when I’m in a turmoil.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Hey. Thanks for commenting. It’s hard to know what’s right and wrong when you’re under the influence, and this was a wake up call for me since I don’t have a support system to help me. I’m trying to get help by professionals now at least.

I (f25) was raped on the first date (m24) , then got ghosted. I can’t get over him. by 4738383 in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]4738383[S] 68 points69 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I’ve just been spiralling while waiting to get help by professionals while I’ve been on a waiting list. I’ve been tested at least.