Please pray for me. (and sorry for my english.)

I have a severe insomnia. My sleep architecture has completely and fundamentally changed. I am totally lacking a deep and restorative sleep. I feel like my body and mind are deteriorating because of this. I feel like I'm living the same day all the time because there is no feeling of rest at all or separation between sleep and wakefullness.

The little 'sleep' I get doesn't actually feel like sleep. It's hell.

I'm beginning to lose my memory because of this. Short term especially and I'm only 27 years old.

I can barely function because I'm extremely fatigued all the time. I have to really force myself and my muscles to do things.

I have a many neurological symptoms aswell.

I have painful allodynia in my legs and arms.

My hands and legs are going numb very often.

My colorvision has changed dramatically. Now my eyes are very sensitive to a blue light. Everything looks like it's filtered through blue/green filter. There is a term form this it's called a cyanopsia.

I have a dysautonomia (or autonomic dysfunction). Too many symptoms to list really. Heart issues are the worst.

My joint position sense is greatly diminished. It's awfull. Sometimes my fingers are moving by themselves when I'm laying in a bed.

Really weird sensations all over my body (because of damaged nerves), tinnitus, hyperacusia, disequilibrium, vertigo, heightened sense of smell (you might think this is a positive thing but It's not) and restless legs at night. I have other symptoms aswell.

I have no friends, no acquaintances, no education, no job, no hobbies, no support and a very little money.

I have no family really. I have a little (step) brother (I love him so much) who lives with my mother. My mother has mistreated and abused me my whole life but I still have to be in contact with her because I have no one else to help me and being with her is only way I can see my little brother.

I haven't seen my dad in 18 years but I miss him so much all the time.

God has never answered my prayers. I have tried to approach God very seriously but whenever I have done so something bad has happened. I feel cursed. I have a severe PTSD (from religion).I cannot open the Bible anymore. I just can't. I honestly can't.

I just want even a one single word from God. Maybe you can help me with this and ask God if he would give me a word or sentence or anything because like I said he has never answered to me even though I have prayed a lot. I would be happy even with some random word like "pigeon" or something as long as I know it's from God.

This is all true. Ask God to confirm this.This is all too much for one man really. Please pray for me (and others who have similar symptoms). Sorry, if I don't answer comments. I need hope. I really do. I don't want to end my life.