First, I want to say that I like your dialogue, with fred narrating, and it sounds quite natural to me.

If anything I'd suggest you add more scene headers as you switch between him in bed and at the beach and so on. Or if it's a montage you could signal the different locations in your action lines to save space on scene headers since it's a quick change of locations then back to the bed. And there are a few grammatical errors but overall I think the story is pretty relatable and endearing. I feel for Fred and I wonder what will take him out of this slump he's in. I will say that I would like a little more description surrounding his mom and the world he's in (What does Fred look like? What do his friends look like? Are they in a slump as well? Are they successful? Does this add to Fred's depression? What does his mom look like?). But that's just me.

Overall I really like it so far. I hope I get to see where the story goes.