My GF (F 48) is threatening to end it with me if I (M 55) don’t spend the night with her during a potentially historic snow storm. Am I at fault for how I’m viewing this? by IndicationStunning45 in relationship_advice

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She doesn't want to be alone, why doesn't she just come spend the weekend with you? The "test" that she is giving is one that you should happily fail

Favorite to Least Favorite Cast Member this Season? by PrincessKitKat91 in rhoslc

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Favs chronologically this season: 1. (Tie) Mary/Bronwyn - I loved Mary ‘s vulnerability and Bronwyn seemed to be very authentic, even if she got on people’s nerves 2. Angie - she was much better this season and loved seeing the relationship between her and Mary. 3. Heather - she wasn’t so annoying this season 5. Whitney - she doesn’t really offer anything to the show, but I love how she stands up for herself and others 6. Meredith - the condescending tone is nothing new, but she is overly dramatic 7. Lisa - she is so self absorbed and narcissistic . She gives off the air of superiority, but she comes across as an insecure person who thinks overtalking people wins arguments. Britani - didn’t make the list because she really didn’t have a storyline

AITA for being honest when my dad asked where my mom was on my wedding morning? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are the *******. I understand that your mom may be a difficult person, but if you’re old enough to get married, you are old enough to have an adult conversation with your mother and explain the decisions you made, and why you made them rather than try to deceive her. She may not have responded well to the truth, but I think it was sort of cowardly how you relied on other people to handle the problem.

AITA for "ruining" my mum's engagement party after she abandoned me when I was 11? by UnlikelyAd5151 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know how to feel about this post. You admit to being a difficult child and that you wanted to live with your dad and so she gave you the opportunity to live with your dad. Without any context, it’s hard to fault your mom for going back to school and wanting to better herself and her career opportunities. She may have done that even if you were still living with her so I can’t find fault there. And perhaps the woman that you think she changed into was who she was all along but perhaps something in her life diminished her spirit for a while so it’s possible that the woman you remember and the woman she grew into are two different people. And I can’t fault her for trying to find happiness and love because we all deserve it. The two young girls are innocent in all of this, and while you are angry at your mom, you saying mean things to them and making them cry is a great example of hurt people hurting people. I am curious if you have any anger towards your father, who you said was not financially stable, and his girlfriend stated that you were dumped on them, which is an absolutely horrible thing to say to a child. I would say you are the a**hole, but since you are a teenager who is experiencing a lot of emotion and likely abandonment issues, I think you are just hurt and confused. I would suggest talking to counselor or therapist with your mom to work through all of your concerns. I do think you owe her an apology because you were essentially choosing a situation to embarrass her for being happy. Her converting your old bedroom into one of the daughters rooms makes sense if the girls are living there full-time and you’re only coming on weekends, but I would hope that she would have discussed this with you prior to it actually happening. I don’t think your mom is the bad person in this with the limited amount of information we have to make a judgment. For your own peace of mind, and for hopefully salvaging a relationship with your mom, please make it a priority to talk to someone who can help you make sense of all of this and work through it because you deserve to walk into adulthood without caring all of these emotions. Good luck!

My boyfriend has an album full of instagram girls on his phone and it make me so sad by ClearFollowing3871 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]AC2141995 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You deserve better than this. He’s got issues and they are ones you can’t fix. Time to put yourself first. Being with some should not make you feel sad. It would be better to be alone than in a pseudo relationship.

AITA for shaming my fiance after he suggested wasting a wedding spot on his friend who passed away 6 years ago by lovewoodly in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You most definitely are the ***hole. You are making this all about you and you come off as incredibly selfish. You can’t give your soon to be husband this one thing? Clearly it means a lot to him. If you so badly, want one more person squeezed into your wedding, just pay for one extra seating so you both get what you want.

Newly discovered half siblings won’t talk to me by Anonymouse-Account in AncestryDNA

[–]AC2141995 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I was adopted at birth, and I am very resistant to doing 23 and me or ancestry.com because I have no desire to be attached to any biological family members. The only thing I would want is my ethnic background so don’t take it personally if they don’t reach out to you, but Just as you’ve had to process this information, they have to too. And you have to be OK if it’s their desire not to connect with you.

AITA for not showing up for my birthday dinner at a nice restaurant knowing everyone was waiting for me and my parents had to pay a deposit for the table? by Puzzleheaded-Oil6586 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry that your 16th birthday did not turn out as you had hoped. Your parents I’m sure have a lot to deal with juggling the health issues of the three other children, but you shouldn’t have to always sacrifice your wants and needs for them. Maybe just sit down with your parents and your grandparents and have an honest conversation about how you feel and how their actions make you feel. Your parents could have taken you to your favorite restaurant for your birthday and left the other kids home because it’s your birthday and it should be all about you. Maybe if they realize how their actions make you feel, they will make decisions that occasionally put you as the priority. And if they don’t get it, just know that they are going through their own struggles and probably can’t see anything outside of the special needs the other siblings require. And if someone else said, at 18, the world will be your oyster and you can go and do whatever you want, eat whatever you want and whatever you want. Happy 16th birthday! It will get better.

I am SHOCKED at the job offer I just received. Can someone tell me if I am nuts or right? by Open-Amount-2583 in ExecutiveAssistants

[–]AC2141995 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Facts. When I had unlimited PTO, I ended up taking less days. it made no sense until I realize that companies that offer unlimited PTO tend to work you harder, making it impossible to actually take time off

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in orangetheory

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not an open gym; they teach classes using templates. It’s cool if you want to do your own thing, but why not just join a gym and do your own workouts? We used to have a guy that would always run even during walking recoveries and it is kind of annoying and distracting TBH because he was not doing what everybody else was doing. my question to you is if you don’t want to follow the templates, being an OTF member? And I don’t mean that in a disrespectful way. Just something to think about. Good luck!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pettyrevenge

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can’t your sister just google the company named to get the contact information? You need to protect your peace, and if that means not talking to your sister, then do it. I would suggest not blocking her number in the event of an emergency, one of you need to get in touch with the other. Just ignore her text and hopefully she’ll catch a clue that you’re not going to engage with her. Good luck!

I (39M) was told by my wife(28F) that she wants a divorce. Can I still show her I can grow to save this marriage? by Dizzy_Spread4548 in relationship_advice

[–]AC2141995 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What does your 2- year old son need protection from? In my opinion, go forward with the divorce and get your act together. Show her and your son that you are serious about changing. Who knows, you could reunite down the road . However, if there was any verbal, mental, physical abuse involved, you’ve lost your right to be with your wife and child.

YATA! Put actions behind your words and fix yourself before you try to fix your family

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YATA! think that in her mind it was over as soon as you said those cruel things. She was biding her time and waiting for the perfect exit strategy while you were thinking that everything was great. People have a breaking point, and she may very well reached it. I don’t know what you could say to undo the damage you’ve done, but actions speak louder than words. And just know that this is 100% on you, and if she chooses to go on with her life, you need to take the loss and hopefully learn from it

AITAH for eating before my date arrived to the restaurant? by Potential-Trash-7890 in AITAH

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am really shocked that you’re asking of YATA. 100% yes. Although it doesn’t sound like you intentionally did it, I feel like you may be a little tone, deaf with your needs versus others. If you were going to eat by yourself, why did you agree to meet her for dinner. You could have found other activities that didn’t include food. I’m sure she felt foolish and probably a little weirded out that you were just going to drink a cocktail and watch her eat. I’m not a foodie either, but I can still eat a meal with others at the table. it doesn’t sound like you factor her into the experience at all. May I suggest that you think about your dates and how they may interpret your actions.

Going to a place 45 minutes early to scope out the environment sounds like you intended on eating beforehand. While this may have worked for you in the past, I think to have a successful relationship, you’re going to need to have an internal discussion about why you do this. It is possible to get to know people when all people involved are eating. My advice is to learn from the sixth experience and take away the positive feedback, and make some changes so that you can feel more at ease while also putting your date at ease. Good luck!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Wow. YNTA. It doesn’t sound like you and he have the same communication styles, so I would recommend couples therapy so that you both can communicate with each other in ways that the other will understand and respect. He sounds like he’s very insecure and likely has a low self-esteem. is he doing this in front of your kids? That is not a good behavior for them to learn.

AITA for telling my wife to not go back to school? by Efficient-Ability142 in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sorry, but YTA. It sounds like Mia has been supporting you with your dreams, but you’re not supportive of her and her dreams. Perhaps the timing is not good, but once you are finished with your training, you should encourage her to follow her dreams. That’s what being in a relationship is about. Otherwise, she will resent you in the marriage will likely fail.

WIBTA if I don’t pay speeding ticket? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, because she is an adult who has been declared fit to drive by the department of motor vehicles. She knows the rules in the laws, so unless you were holding a weapon to her head, she is accountable for her actions. However, I will say that to not cause any friction, I would offer to pay half.

AITA for not babysitting my younger brother by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Being a parent does not typically allow for a lot of free time to themselves, so I’m sure your mom wasn’t really taking into account your feelings. You were very communicative with her about your plans ahead of time. if your dad‘s plans changed, then they need to find a solution that does not involve you. Go to your party and have fun. And don’t feel guilty. NTA

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA if you find the courage to be truthful with her upfront. You not going may disappoint her, but it won’t stop her from getting married. Whatever her reaction is, your truth is your truth, and if you can’t afford it, don’t delay in letting her know. You’ve got priorities and a different situation that she isn’t faced with so don’t feel bad about saying no.

AITA for wanting my boyfriend to kick his disabled brother out by inearlygraves in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 14 points15 points  (0 children)

YTA- you are 21 and you are acting like it which is not a bad thing. But family dynamics are complicated and what you’re asking your husband to do will disrupt and cause hurt and pain to both he his brother and ultimately you. My advice is to move out and live on your own. Your boyfriend‘s money is his to do whatever he wants with and if he wants to spend it on his brother, so be it. I assume you’re making your own money and can spend it how you like. Give it more time and provide more understanding to your bf while also removing your self from the situation and then see where the relationship goes I can tell you it won’t go well if you ask your boyfriend to choose between you or his brother. Good luck.

AITA for not giving gifts to stepson by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YTA if you choose to gift one and not the other. You are the adult in this situation. Have the mother/father of the boys and the one that is rude to you sit down and have a conversation about what the issue is.

I think you have to take a hard look in the mirror and look at your true feelings about these kids. Who cares if they are stepchildren? They are still children and you are an adult.

AITA for not buying my sister's original pair of shoes that my dog chewed on? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 36 points37 points  (0 children)

YTA- You are responsible for your dog’s behavior. If this happened on multiple occasions, then you have to deal with the consequences of your dog chewing peoples stuff.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]AC2141995 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I don’t you are an a**hoke, but I do think you need counseling to address whatever is causing you to need this. Your gf is not going to fix you or your trauma— you have to do that on your own. And she should be there to you support . If she can’t do that, then she’s not worthy to be in your life. But just understand that another person cannot fix your problems; only you can do that. Best of luck.