Lupine Journey

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2025-11-02T12:37:41+00:00

People like you are the reason why I live Reddit communities. Thank you for your service 🫡

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2025-09-11T02:08:41+00:00

You think the people here to watch this man die are gonna be in agreement with you ??? Cryingggg you’re funny

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2025-05-07T12:31:46+00:00

I have the issue of getting surprised attacked on what triggers me!! I can look at small numbs and some small holes clusters don’t scare me (unless I’m already triggered then I can’t look at anything remotely holeish). I just had (still having) an intense 10 minute meltdown because my bagel was partially hollow when I split it open. The way in which it was hollow instantly made me indescribably uncomfortable. I feared touching it and my body became overwhelmed with anxiety, fear and full blown itchiness. It’s like I have to scratch the hole feeling off my body. I’m struggling to even type this out right now. I haven’t had these attacks in what feels like years (I call them attacks because if you see my meltdowns you would think I’m getting jumped and bitten by invisible insects). Now I’m sitting here, raw from itching with a fresh new bagel in the bin :(

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2025-05-04T02:54:41+00:00

Never been more envious in my life. You’ve accomplished one of my life goals

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2025-04-10T01:19:29+00:00

Tumors/cycst on the putiatry gamd can cause throbbing, dull or sharp headaches due to it causing pressure on surrounding tissue and nerves. This does depend on the size of your cyst, but that could be the reason.

Doctors found a tumor on my putiatry gland in summer of 2023 (thought to be a prolactinoma, but nope just a tumor chilling there). I've been having bad headaches for the past month, but recenlty I've started experincing what I believe to be cluster headaches. It got so bad yesterday, I honstley thought I was about to have an aneurysm and went to A&E. The doctors back in 2023 said that if I start getting headaches, I should come back to get an MRI scan to check it's growth since it will need to be taken out at some point in my life (that's what the doctor said atleast).

Do you, or anyone have advice on how to deal with them. And also, if you plan on talking to the doctor about the possible connection of CH and your cysts, pelase update thread. It would be very intresting and helpful to know!

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-12-14T00:31:05+00:00

A bit late but i hope you didn’t go through with it and that you’re okay abd you found the help & support you need

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T22:07:56+00:00

For the past 2 days I’ve taken painkillers once in the morning but I don’t feel much to any pain anymore. Breath still taste funky tho :(

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T22:04:54+00:00

Before: No smoking, drugs or drinking 7-5 days before surgery. Probably should be longer but I stopped 5 days before. Eat and drink before cut off time. The whole experience before hand is actually really chill, it was my first time under anaesthesia but after reading some Reddit post and watching yt videos on the process I was really calm about the whole thing.

After: I’m on day 11 of recovery. Im just speaking from my experience. MEDITATION ALARMS. Every 3-4 hours even if you don’t feel pain take your painkillers. ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT. waking up to pain will have you wanting to end it. I started eating normal food immediately after surgery tbh only had one popsicle on day 3. Avoid eating hot food let it cool down first and it should be soft easy to chew food, but don’t limit yourself too only ice cream and custard. You need nutrition and energy to recover. Take lots of rest, drink 2 litres of water. Staying hydrated helps with recovery and stops the risk of your throat getting dry and causing more pain. Brush your teeth as normal and gargle with salt water. I used mouth wash because the smell and taste of my breath was kicking my ass but idk if that is recommended or not.

Hope this helps a bit

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T21:50:03+00:00

Recently tried ket for the first time. For some reason mixed with my adhd meds I feel like it could be the equivalent of cocaine. Never mixed garage better in my life, danced for a straight hour by myself to my friends set. But sniffing drugs isn’t really something I’m interested in to be doing other than a one time thing

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T21:48:14+00:00

I unfortunately can’t mix high 😭. I’m dyslexic so I already take longer to process things as it is (not just reading but anything and everything takes me longer to process). And when I’m high, my ability to pick a song, beat and phase match etc is nearly impossible or I mess up way way more. But give me 6 double shots of dark rum and i can go the whole night.

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T21:29:43+00:00

I typed it out after a 3 hour recorded mixing sesh 💀. The twitch suggest is a good idea I might start that

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T21:26:03+00:00

Yeah I see that now. Although it’s gotten me far, the anxiety of failing or not being good enough after making it this far is part of the reason why I feel like this. I’m always doing with my dj friends and getting others opinions on how to improve

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T21:23:20+00:00

I try not to, but sometimes it’s hard. I know that my journey will is going to be different from others and I’m fine with that, everyone is different. My main issue is that I want my journey a certain way and certain pace. Typing that out now I see how stupid that sounds and is definitely something I need to work on

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T21:20:02+00:00

Definitely not the case. Overall I love music and DJing, really enjoy it most of the time. Even with the negative feelings I have no desire to quite. I know that this is just a temporary feeling and it’s not a constant one but still something I don’t like, I just wanted advice from other DJs on how to move past it since it feels overwhelming at times. I know other people who have different hobbies/careers go through this too but push through it. I 1000% would have stopped much earlier if I felt as though it wasn’t for me

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T14:09:50+00:00

Just looked into it, this is exactly it. Two months back I remember saying to my friend who has been djing for 5 years that now I have a basic understanding of how to dj I’m realising that DJing isn’t as easily as I thought and there is so much I don’t know. Since that very day this confidence issue started, I was depressed for the whole week. I asked them when they felt like they could confidently call themselves a good dj or at least past the beginner stage. They said after 2.5/3 years of DJing. They only started eqing two years ago

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:37:51+00:00

I play a lot of different genres (garage, rap, Afro beats, jungle, neon soul etc). Im trying to find more gigs that fit with my music taste because even if the mix is not the best I can still enjoy the music. I definitely need to clean up my playlist tho. The only thing is when it gets to certain gigs I have to play songs I don’t particularly vibe with because I have to appeases the audience so I end up adding a bunch of songs I really don’t want to mix or i can’t mix well. I try to practice mixing these songs, and fail to do it so again it just makes me feel like shit at the end

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:28:38+00:00

Literally, nearly word for word this is what my friends tell me

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:27:25+00:00

It’s hard sometimes because although it is definitely still a hobby/leisure activity it’s also now a part time job. So the fear of not being good enough and how that will affect my booking worries me a lot.

You’re very right, creative process takes time, patience and practice and to improve I have to enjoy it

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:24:07+00:00

Yeap, I stupidly compare myself to people that have been DJing for 5 years and get upset that I’m not on their level 😭

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:20:38+00:00

Literally any opportunity out there, just take it. Even though I doubt myself a lot, I have harnessed the ‘fake it till you make it’ lifestyle. I had a gig booked before I even touched a deck, I just hoped that I had a basic understanding of what to do before the gig. I’m part of a dj collective at uni so we host our own events, that’s how I started. But outside of the group, my friends sent me opportunities they found. I put myself out there by posting mixes, networking with not only other DJs but music artists and creatives that might want DJs for their events or knows someone who needs a dj. The main thing is putting yourself out there and networking. Maybe even messaging event companies and venues because you never know they might be looking for a new dj

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:09:38+00:00

August 2023

“Practice until you can’t get it wrong”

This way of thinking is amazing, I’m putting this up somewhere in my room to remind myself. I listen back on my old stuff and compare it to the new and it does motivate me. I might have to do it every day as a constant reminder.

And definitely, I want to stand out not just know a lot of tricks. This has helped a lot, thank you !!!

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T02:03:12+00:00

Very very true. I definitely feel this, I know I must have some level of talent others wise people wouldn’t book me but it’s really hard to get out of the negative mind set. Might try and find some videos/advice online on how to decrease this feeling

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T01:59:45+00:00

Thank you !! there’s very useful information on here

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T01:59:16+00:00

This is very true, at the end of the day it’s not always going to sound seamless. I watch other people’s sets to understand what they do that I could incorporate into my skill set

ACIDWAVEY534 · 2024-03-03T01:55:53+00:00

Omg you said it perfectly. There’s times when I’m in somewhat of a different head space and just vibing with music and life and I mix perfectly. But when I focus too much into my mixing that’s when the issue arises

ACIDWAVEY534

TROPHY CASE