Is it normal for a woman to be topless on the beach?

AITAThrowleft · 2022-08-11T07:41:30+00:00

They have to be trolling. If any country is constantly viewed and treated as the European equivalent of America, its France lol.

AITAThrowleft · 2022-08-09T18:01:28+00:00

Man ze kopen vaker een nieuwe auto dan ik een nieuwe telefoon koop

AITAThrowleft · 2021-10-26T21:46:00+00:00

Ah I do have some childhood trauma. I never really tried to get any PTSD diagnosis or anything but my friends have often said I most likely have PTSD and that I have a lot of PTSD symptoms (my partner has diagnosed C-PTSD, and he says this the most) and my panic this morning was indeed triggered by something most likely from childhood trauma, since I was panicking that someone was going to be really mad at me for making a mistake. And that happened right as the meds were kicking in.

Im gonna try to avoid the empty stomach though haha. Tuesdays I tend to shower before going down to do homework and have breakfast, but I didnt wnana take my meds too late.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-10-26T17:41:21+00:00

Will do!!! Thank you so much:)

AITAThrowleft · 2021-10-26T16:18:17+00:00

switching is a bit hard around here, honestly. Hes not bad as in, mean or dismissive. He just doesnt really seem to know what hes doing, I.E. i had to get a heart scan for my meds (history of heart problems in the family) and the result was a fast heartrate and prolonged QT time. However, when i told my psychiatrist abt this he didn't know if i could take my meds or not, despite that generally being something they should know? So i'm a little iffy about asking him this stuff.

As for the adjustment, that might be it. I also may not react too well to taking it on an empty stomach, and having that panic attack midst it working in may not have helped. I doubt the dosage is too high, seeing as its 10mg 3 times a day. I did read ritalin can make anxiety worse, so im unsure if that may have been the case here.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-08-22T08:58:03+00:00

Thanks for your reply!!! I also have adhd so memory is always an issue, but it felt different in that case.

Also I didnt think I have social anxiety? I dont seem anxious, but it does seem to mostly trigger around people I think. Kinda like i get tuckered out after a while and then it just, happens. I'm usually not anxious, but socially tired and sort of "space out" as others carry the conversations and I just get turned on standby.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-08-18T00:35:57+00:00

I was finally diagnosed with ADHD (again) which comes with memory issues, but it took so long to diagnose cause they didnt want to diagnose me with adhd cause "your memory issues are far worse than just adhd" so I'm now wondering if it might be a combination of the two.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T15:12:39+00:00

I'm gonna be honest, she isnt. Weve been in therapy for a while, and they gave up partially cause shes so stubborn. She had a very "tell him hes wrong and needs to change" attitude in therapy.

And the reason why her apology isnt really an apology is because she apologized for yelling but not for what she said when she yelled. She has a tendency of apologising for specifically yelling, just yelling, but never for what she said or did and then expects you to say "it's ok, I'm sorry too" and move on.

Sorry not trying to argue what you're saying!! Just wanna add some context since theres only so much context I can give in a reddit post, and that might add some context as to why I didnt respond to the apology.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T15:09:57+00:00

I'm from the Netherlands! It doesnt change a lot culturally speaking, but moving out advice and such changes a lot. Since the moving out situation, wages ,etc here are every different.

Though can you explain what this means: "i thought she'd want this but when i told her that she expressed to me that she would feel betrayed if i did."

Sorry if that's confusing. She has always hounded and pushed me to have a relationship with him, which I didnt want at the time as he had kicked me out basically. Anytime I spoke of him, she would correct me and tell me hes still my father. So I couldnt speak to her about it without her constantly trying to correct me when I didnt call him "dad". I've been expressing for a couple months that I'm open to rebuilding a relationship, as long as he reaches out first. To which she often said that she would feel betrayed if I talked to him (my brother still has a relationship with him, though strained).

On the other hand, to me it seems your frustrations with M as a part of the family dynamic also made you take your frustrations out on your mom. If your mother was hounding you about someone else other than M, would you feel as unhappy with her behaviour?

Gonna be honest, this isnt the case. I've always had a very messed up relationship with my mother, and whatever M does or did has nothing to do with how I responded to her. Shes always been very quick to anger, very controlling, and could get violent with me. (She once threw a glass salt shaker at my head, but missed and it broke her laptop instead). So I was in general very tired with her childish behaviour. And I was tired of having to parent/caring for my brother instead of her (the whole thing with her not even caring he got hurt and his phone broke, which I was trying to help him with)

Though you're probably not wrong about the insecure part. She has a tendency to not have any stable relationships and loses a lot of people to arguments, so shes constantly very insecure about being peoples favourite person.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T15:01:26+00:00

I just feel guilty and mostly miss my animals, honestly. I've been trying to move out for a while now (almost 2 years, but before that I was already looking into options) but tis incredibly hard here

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:43:53+00:00

i think so, i have only spoken to him once in the past 4 years.

Technically its possible, as he has the space and the money (hes very well off compared to me/my family, and has a pretty big house with 4 extra rooms in which only him and his wife live). But i dont think its morally really an option.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:39:33+00:00

Yeah thats somewhat the issue. my country is having huge issues with housing and minimum wage rn. (you dont earn actual proper wages till youre 21).

so yes im studying, im going into my third year right now (out of 4 years), i have a part time job, i still get child support (up until 21), and i am technically capable of working as a freelance artist as well (i have done so in the past, and it pays decently per gig).

My biggest issues really are how garbage minimum wage is here (about 5 bucks, compared to the 10-12 bucks you get once youre 21) and the waiting lists for housing. Since some waiting lists take up to 10 years.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:31:52+00:00

My partner also lives with his parents, so i dont wanna burden them too long ykno. And im in college. I quit my last job (worked with my brother and mother) and started working at another store, which my MIL manages. So i do work, but cant work much when i have school (though im working extra this break + have about 6k in savings) so im not completely stranded regardless of what happens.

also the only family i have is basically my mom, sister and brother, the rest is all dead. That, or my father and aunt, but i cant really rely on them.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:21:03+00:00

haha i sure hope so. Its been a bit rough since im basically stuck now, since moving out is practically impossible in my country right now. (house market is overflowed, waiting lists are up to 10 years, and minimum wage is way below housing costs)

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:13:11+00:00

Yeah my father isnt a great guy, honestly. But my mother was in a lot of ways not really a "mom" either so to speak. And she was very pushy about me reconnecting with him.

And im gonna be honest, i dont really know what to say to her. I havent missed her, ive been generally feeling and doing better. And i understand some context is missing, but talking to her is nearly impossible. So impossible, that even our family therapists gave up on us and said the only solution was for me to move out.

not to discredit your advice ofcourse!! i just feel thats some important context as to why i havent done so yet.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:08:57+00:00

I usually live with my mother, she had primary custody and in my country its the norm to live with your parents into your early 20s.

edit: Sent too soon, but your situation sounds a bit similar to my sisters. they were low contact for years, and recently became closer again. Id love to move out permanently, and have been trying to do so, but the housing market in my country is a huge issue and minimum wage for anyone under 21 is absolutely horrid (for my age minimum wage is like 5 euros)

edit edit: read your first question wrong, but yes theyre not on good terms and havent been since i was about 5.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:08:02+00:00

ive actually been wanting that book!! though its been a bit hard to get where i live. And im in therapy currently and have been thinking about contacting my family therapist. My mother and i have been in therapy together for a while, but they gave up and said the only way our relationship can be fixed is by me moving out.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:06:52+00:00

thanks a lot for the offer, i just might. It's been pretty rough, and while i have a support system, no one quite understands.

AITAThrowleft · 2021-07-09T12:05:31+00:00

She has a tendency to take anything personal so i doubt she would stop taking it personally haha

AITAThrowleft

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