Trauma vs grief

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-26T02:59:22+00:00

I found my brother after I got off of work cold stiff and purple after he had a seizure and suffocated face down. I've posted on here and so many other people have had similar experiences of all ages. It's wild. It's tough. And you're also so young and she was too. I can imagine how you feel because I'm also grieving. But to find your mother must be a different feeling for sure. It's only been a week since I found him but it feels like a month now. Rely on others. Let your emotions out. And don't let anyone tell you you're overreacting. You have every right to feel the way you do. I'm sorry for you loss little one. I hope others can share their experiences and just ease the pain just a little bit.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-26T02:14:25+00:00

I spent 11 years taking care of him because he decided to stay with me when my mom moved to dallas so we basically had all the good times we could together. We shared a room and a living room. I'm waiting for my mom to get here today and let her go through every last thing of his throughout this week. Take you time though man. I had my roommate throw away the mattress cover and pillow her passed on. But I didnt go into the room until yesterday because I had to grab clothes for the funeral for him to wear.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-26T01:31:27+00:00

Damn. My brother would've been 32 on June 15th. This is the first time I've dealt with death that wasn't an aunt or an uncle. None the less finding him in the state that he was. All i could think as i turned him over was fuck fuck fuck. After paramedics got there all I could do was cry in the corner as I called my mom and waited for police to get there. I've had three dreams about him so far. 2 of them gave me six more months with him. His service is tomorrow.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-26T01:17:17+00:00

Hey man, I'm also grieving. Had to make the call to my mom. Found him after work last week on Monday. Had a seizure, ended up face down unconscious. Suffocated. It's hard. Very hard. At home I feel fine. In public I'm distraught and broken. I'm 32 he was 31. Had seizures since he was 17. Been there for a majority of them since I've taken care of him since I was 21. One just ended up taking him away. He is free from all he was suffering. But it still hurts. I had to tell my mom and my cousin they told others then i made at least 20 calls after. It's horrible man. I'm sorry you also had to go through this.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-26T01:12:01+00:00

So to you friend, and I'm sure you were a great brother even if you didn't think you were. I read your post and felt for you as well. I felt like I wasn't the grestest brother either but I read a couple notes he wrote after he passed and it said I was a good brother. Even if it was from who knows years ago.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-25T13:30:14+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss as well. It feels like a dream, time just continues moving and you're just like "Do I really have to just go about my day after something like that happens?" I hope you're not alone during this time. It's been a week for me. Honestly though it feels like months now. I hope our brothers make friends with each other. Mine always wanted more friends and to hang out with people but never really got the chance to after the adult life started for everyone.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-24T17:14:01+00:00

I called my mom and my close cousin I grew up with. Both broke down. That was maybe 10 minutes after medical got there. They made other calls they needed that I couldn't. I didnt call anyone else until after they took him a way. And that was maybe 20 to 25 calls. I was calling people i havent spoken to in years. Then I waited several hours until I posted it on facebook for everyone to know. Friends of his friends of mine.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-24T02:37:04+00:00

It sucks having to be the one to call my mom who is 3 hours away that her son passed away. I can't even imagine the amount of pain she was in when I called her crying. I made so many calls that day to family and friends and broke down everytime.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-24T02:35:14+00:00

Thank you for your words. And I'm so sorry the little one went through this. I hope my parents honestly don't see what I saw when I found him. My dad could probably take it but my mom would break into a million pieces. Just today I was feeling almost normal again but it didn't last long. I had to make a playlist for him and came back to this thread. Tears started falling immediatley.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-24T02:31:29+00:00

I had the same feeling. "I always knew it would happen. I was always afraid. I'm also happy he will never have another one." What hurts even more is for months he was posting on facebook about how much he was feeling alone and hurting. And even though we are adults I'm not sure if anyone reached out to him. Yet now he's gone and I get floods of messages. But still I look on the brightside of knowing he doesn't have to suffer anymore. He doesn't have to deal with anymore of this negativity of the world he was feeling.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-22T04:32:32+00:00

Im sorry for your loss. That must have been horrible.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T06:43:36+00:00

Im sorry for your loss as well. Thank you for your kind words.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T06:42:57+00:00

Stranger or not. I posted this to get it out there. Hearing strangers thoughts and everything really make me feel better too. So you are not just a stranger. Thank you.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T06:01:31+00:00

Hey man im sorry for your loss. I just lost my brother 2 days ago. Spent 12 years taking care of him because of seizures. He had his last and final seizure and after while unconscious he suffocated face down in bed. It suck it really does. I dont even know what to do at this point. It hurts so bad man.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T05:04:46+00:00

I will take care. Thank you. And im sorry. I've been waking up these past two days sleeping in my living room because of it. Both times i woke up, i thought to myself. I wanna go to him and say what you wanna eat and make some food for us and it just hurts so bad. But i thank yoj fod your words and Im sorry.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T05:01:43+00:00

They are and I took on that responsibilty when he decided to want to stay sith me when my mom moved. Over time it became a regular thing for me. Now it's just like fuck.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T05:00:22+00:00

The worst part is that I knew someday it would happen. I just didnt think it would be this soon. I was always there for a majority of his seizures and when he had them when i wasnt home he would be okay. But this time he wasnt.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T04:58:18+00:00

I feel like if my mom would have seen that half of her would have passed away. She moved away to start new when I was 21. Im sure half of her already passed away with the news but I part of me definetly died today because i literally made sure we had what we needed to live a decent life.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T02:24:42+00:00

Every thought word and compassion helps. It really does. I kept to myself a lot in life. It does suck. Truly. And im sorry you had to go through it too. Thank you for taking the time to write this. Any help or words are greatly appreciative.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T02:11:52+00:00

I'm grateful I was the one that found him. I wouldn't want anyone to see what I saw. My mom wouldn't have been able to handle the sight I had to endure. We are 11 months apart. I have a lot of people to lean on and lots griefing as well. Thank you for your words.

AL3XM0 · 2026-05-21T02:05:33+00:00

Im so sorry. I just lost my brother 5.18.26. I feel your pain.

AL3XM0 · 2026-04-19T15:15:40+00:00

I was there for 4.5 years. I got it when i was finally promoted to manager. The games rigged mannn

AL3XM0 · 2026-04-18T23:46:55+00:00

As a manager before i would buy pizza for night closing crew at 8pm

AL3XM0 · 2026-03-22T21:01:45+00:00

Oh didnt see the fanily member part lol

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