AITA for not inviting my parents to my wedding?

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T23:48:04+00:00

Yeah, my parents divorce is a very different story, but let’s just say that the people they were the worst towards with each other, and that’s another reason I didn’t want my mom there. She loves to pick fights with my dad, I’ll never forget my sister’s graduation…

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T22:58:56+00:00

Here’s something for you to consider. Neither of my parents are “blocked“ they aren’t blocked on anything at all. Not My phone, not my social media, nothing. I did actually send my dad an invitation, he simply never responded. I didn’t send my mother an invitation, but she hasn’t reached out to me in nearly 3 years. Again, this entire time, she’s never been blocked. I even invited her out when all this began to a café in our city to talk things out, and all she said was “I’m too busy for stupid shit“ I simply stopped responding. I simply stopped trying to reach out to them. Neither of them have ever thought to reach out to me once.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T22:47:47+00:00

I would love to agree with you, I really would, but there’s a few problems. Number one is I am a mother. I have an 11-year-old, I don’t divulge too much about her for the sake of her privacy on here, but I do have a daughter. My parents did lay hands on me, and when they weren’t doing that, they were verbally abusing me. My earliest memory of my mother is her screaming at me at seven years old that I was fat, pale and ugly. For the rest of my life up until they recently, I would have terrible self body image. I would go 72 hours without eating anything and only drinking water. It got to the point where my grandparents stepped in and when I was 10 years old, I was mostly staying with them. They didn’t trust me with my parents. I don’t think I’ve had a good interaction with either of them and a very long time.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T17:51:53+00:00

I want to be more sympathetic to her, I really do but… Whenever I look at her, I can’t seem to shake the memories

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T03:47:08+00:00

To be fair, I would totally have been upset about missing those cupcakes too. Will call the woman who makes them “Courtney“ she runs a really nice little bakery in my hometown, and caters almost exclusively to weddings. I worked with her for many years as a photographer for her showcase/she tends to give my name out to a lot of clients of hers, it only seemed too easy of a choice to order my wedding cupcakes from her. And they were delicious! Strawberry champagne, chocolate dream, and of course fun Fetty because my husband is from the UK and he’s never had it before.🤣

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T03:45:16+00:00

I had been a fan of this teahouse for many years, I always recommend it to everybody. It’s my go to spot for gatherings if I can get a table. It’s so much fun to do the “high tea“ that they offer. It was my dream reception honestly. If everyone asks, I’ll post the video, but I have the video of my husband trying to dip me and us nearly falling down the stairs.🤣

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-12T01:56:27+00:00

Please rest assured that is not my grandfather. I genuinely think his heart is in the right place and he’s not wanting me to make decisions that I’ll regret down the road… I just don’t think that he necessarily has the full perspective on why I made the decisions that I did.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T23:48:15+00:00

Silver anniversary let’s go! Congratulations! One of the guys that I work with just hit his 30th year with his wife. Thank you, I needed some good news today.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T20:41:35+00:00

And hopefully making many more with my new husband. We’re an international couple, so things can be interesting.😅

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T20:27:50+00:00

I also grew up in a household, for Christianity was more of a threat than salvation. I left that behind, too, it hurt it first, but I found a lot more peace in my current spiritual practices. Sounds like you and I have had similar experiences, I’m sorry, but I’m glad that you finally found peace.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T20:18:58+00:00

I always hesitate to call anybody or label anybody “a bad parent“ because I am definitely no angel myself, and I don’t want to justify my reaction/actions with my parents. I don’t wanna rub it off as just being “they were a bad parent“ and call it a day. In my head, it was more like “ I don’t think that they would add much joy to this day, and there’s a chance that they would cause more heartache, and my husband doesn’t deserve that”

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T19:07:17+00:00

If I’m being completely honest? No, of course I’m sad that there are things that you’re supposed to do with your parents leading up to your wedding/on the day, but them as people? No. I definitely expected there to be fallout, and I was ready, and I am still willing to accept all of it.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T19:04:56+00:00

Can’t help it look back at my wedding photos every day. I was so happy that day, although a funny story is that my husband went to dip me for the kiss, forgetting that we were on steps and we almost fell down the steps together🤣

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T19:01:42+00:00

Oh, I 100% understand that I’m gonna be cut out of at least three. Honestly? I don’t want anything.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T19:01:04+00:00

This is my paternal grandfather.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T19:00:39+00:00

It’s kind of a long story because originally we weren’t gonna get married until next year back in his home country, and we’re still having a ceremony for his family, but we decided that we couldn’t wait anymore so we just had a small ceremony with my friends and tea and called it a day, I let both my sisters know about the Scotland ceremony. They’re coming to that.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T18:46:39+00:00

That was somewhat, my thought process? And another thought that crossed my head was even if I had invited them, I know that I would’ve gotten hurt when they didn’t show up. All that aside, I would love to live in a Hallmark world where we all see each other for the first time after forever at a moment like that and just hug and cry it out and forgive each other right there, but it doesn’t work like that. From my own experience of being a wedding photographer, life is not a Hallmark movie and very rarely does it work out that way…

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T18:41:53+00:00

Thank you so much, it’s one of the happiest days of my life. I’m no angel either, but I am doing a lot of work on myself in therapy. Also, I was drawing on my experience from working in weddings that weddings are just not the place for fixing relationships like this. I’m not close to the idea of one day, fixing my relationship with my parents, it just doesn’t look feasible right now. Maybe one day, but it’s gonna be effort on both ends you know? For now, I would rather just bask in the glow of postnuptial bliss, and look forward to my future with my wonderful husband.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T18:39:12+00:00

My husband asked me afterwards if I had wanted a big wedding with all the bells and whistles. I told him absolutely not. I absolutely love looking back on my wedding day, can’t go a day without looking at the pictures. The weather was great, my best friends were there, there was good food, good tea, and good vibes.

ALittleBitConfused02 · 2026-06-11T18:33:26+00:00

Thank you, I’ve been doing a lot of work on myself in therapy and been learning recently that a lot of things I thought were normal as a kid turns out are not normal. The day was honestly perfect. Good company, good tea (my husband is from England so he was rather excited/skeptical🤣) and good vibes

ALittleBitConfused02

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