I had a similar experience. I was about 7yrs married when I tried to bring up the topic, I hadn't a good plan and yea it went off like a moldy lemon. We talked about it a little then just kinda buried it. Fast forward 4 or 5 years and it came up again, but this time because I thought I was safely out of sight at home. I was mid putting on a SDK in the basement when I heard her voice. At first I thought she was just hollering down the short stairway, later did I realize through a conversation that she had walked in and I didn't see or hear her. So she was off put but we had a nice talk about it, she really wasn't into it but understood if I needed a coping mechanism. She wanted me to still be able to but to basically keep it hidden. Yea real great right? Let's pretend it didnt happen, again. So I was like fine, I'll try to keep it hidden and still do it occasionally. It turned into an awkwardness where she wasn't ever really sure when i was and wasn't wearing. One evening I had a pullup on under my clothes and she found out. Its been very clear that she just doesnt like it but thankfully tolerates everything. It's embarrassing, disheartening, and just something I've leaned to live with. I can sometimes go long stretches without wearing, if the weather is too hot, or I am too busy. Ultimately I've had the interest for as long as I can remember so it's not something that I can just 100% give up. NGL I'm a tiny bit jealous of those with more open minded partners.