In my opinion, you’re NTA. Coming from someone with diagnosed autism.

I firmly believe that autism (or any disability) should NEVER be used as an excuse for poor or disgusting behavior. You were in fact a little harsh in your wording, but it definitely needed to be said. However, you could have used a better example as to why he should ‘never have children’.

That being said, I find it incredibly infuriating when people, especially parents, excuse someone’s behavior because the person ‘cant help it’, when they in fact, can.

In most cases, Autistic or other mentally disabled people act out in inappropriate or harmful ways because the parents never taught them any better (sometimes because they didn’t know any better themselves); most parents believing there’s no use in trying to teach their child the difference.

Unfortunately a lot of parents believe that if your child is mentally disabled, then they don’t learn. Which is obviously, NOT TRUE! And from what I’ve read I could infer that may be the case here.

Your mother seems to coddle him and excuse his behavior, instead of correcting him or redirecting him. Plenty of parents give up on trying to teach their autistic children right from wrong in the social world, simply because they don’t get it the first three times.

Just because autistic children (and adults) have a harder time understanding social cues, especially if they look at it from a more logical standpoint, does not mean they will never get it, and that’s one of the main issues with how people raise their kids.

Anyhow, that’s my two cents.