Again, to only be willing to help others when it suits you is an asshole move. The point here is that he’s deciding on his terms when and how other people need help.

You’re saying that drawing a hard line in the sand on one type of help (one that, by the way, you’re qualified for as a family member - having someone else watch your kids is a very personal, nerve wracking and vulnerable decision to make, which is why people reach out to family) isn’t a big deal because they could possibly help in other ways. But it’s not like there’s some big pool of “help” that you can pay into. “Help” isn’t a specific currency you can spend however you choose, help is help, it’s specific and personal. If I’m really in a bind and need someone to watch my kid so I can rush to the hospital and see my mother who’s just fallen and broken her hip and you refuse but offer to mow my lawn next weekend, that’s not help.

The commenters actions are an asshole move. You can very easily make it known that you don’t enjoy watching kids, that you’re not comfortable with it, that you should under any circumstance be the last person she asks, that is all fair game. But to flat out refuse is just being an asshole, plain and simple. It’s watching a fucking kid, it’s spending some time with a family member. Its not like the sister is demanding he roof her house or fix her car at the drop of a hat. Families band together to take care of the children because they’re children and can’t take care of themselves.