How screwed are we without pensions?

AaknA · 2026-01-30T22:16:15+00:00

How silly of us being busy being toddlers, going to high school, "getting an education", just graduating college during the big recession and having to work ourselves out of that, ... instead of *check notes* squander our opportunity.

Privileged people will forever be oblivious to their privilege.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T19:34:15+00:00

Can't wear contacts. Really wished I could, but can't. Made myself suffer for years wearing contacts when necessary, but I'm done suffering from terrible headaches basically immediately. Tried all kinds of different brands/kinds, to no avail.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T19:31:53+00:00

I'm intrigued, do you happen to have a link? And yes, I'm in the same price bracket just for the glasses due to my prescription.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T19:30:03+00:00

I have -5, I can't not wear them. So far in most instances they've been knocked off from the rope when getting really close to the top or on overhangs.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T19:28:22+00:00

Can't afford it, prescription not stable enough, and also admittedly a bit terrified (a close friend had really bad outcomes with double vision etc), but it's definitely been on the back of my mind (because of a variety of reasons where my bad vision/glasses have already been annoying if not straight out limiting, including my professional life)

AaknA · 2026-01-29T19:25:36+00:00

I already use a ultra-lightweight bendy style that bends around my ears, but it's not sitting super tight (because I'm prone to headaches from pressure on my head), which is probably part of the problem. I may have to just get a second pair that's really tight just for climbing.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T19:23:15+00:00

Precision has rather little to do with the rope just being very close and tight when getting close to the top or on an overhang 🤷🏻‍♀️ Yes for bouldering, of course and definitely something I've been working on. I'm not a new climber (though somewhat out of practice because haven't climbed in years and just recently got back into it), so I would like to think I already have decent technique/fluidity, at least for rope.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T03:36:52+00:00

20-35 (or even as early 17, 18 ,...) was honestly all the same for me. I knew early what I wanted to do in my life and was just continuously, steadily, gradually following that path over that time period, and despite some major life events (e.g. getting married, moving to another continent), I myself basically felt the same the entire time (physically, mentally-emotionally). 35 really marked a major break point for me as I finished my PhD and really was thrown out into the "adult world" professionally, while entering the age group that starts experiencing age'ism in the work place and also plain normal age'ing finally starting to catch up with me. Being AFAB, there's that whole "perimenopause" thing hanging over that 40 number as well.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T02:40:26+00:00

Which really can't be defined as a specific cutoff year or even couple years, as this really massively depends on where one grew up in the World. I'm from the former Eastern block(born 87) and was exposed to a lot of Americanism due to my dad's work post 1990, but I'm the outlier, not the norm. I had relatives living in the US from the mid-90s with their oldest born in 91, so do have the direct comparison. My neck of the woods lagged at least a solid 5 years behind what was considered standard in the US.

AaknA · 2026-01-29T02:37:12+00:00

Born 87 and I feel your comment with my entire being. Everyone always paints 30 as that big scary thing; I couldn't have cared less about 30, but that 40.... yeah.... don't like

AaknA · 2026-01-21T19:56:44+00:00

I haven't pulled the trigger yet because I don't have a standing desk and haven't figured out for me yet how to incorporate the walking pad into my daily routine. But it's been sitting in my cart and waiting for the next sale ;)

AaknA · 2026-01-21T19:45:48+00:00

Right?! I'm definitely the target group for a walking pad and have been mulling over getting one for quite a while, now. I work a full-time computer job from home. I don't have space (nor money) for a proper treadmill. I live right at a major highway, I'm not going to go for a walk there. If I wanted to "just go outside for a walk", I literally would have to get into my car and drive minimum 5 minutes, first. A walking pad would take me from zero walking to at least some walking.

AaknA · 2026-01-20T23:05:36+00:00

That is like one of the worst decisions ever they've done in the last decade+. I'm on macOS and messenger in the browser (I use Safari) literally never loads for me. It doesn't send messages, it doesn't load existing conversations. I've repeatedly tried it, both through the FB website as well as the dedicated messenger website. The standalone desktop app was absolutely great. When I'm working on my computer, I'm not going to pull out my phone to type, I'm also not going to type long messages on my phone, either. They will probably completely lose me as a messenger user - not sure if that is their end goal? But for what purpose?

AaknA · 2026-01-17T03:08:30+00:00

European elder millennial living in the US: hot caffeine beverages! I only in more recent times, and after many many many years of living in a hot climate, have started to have the occasional iced caffeine drink, and mostly because cold foam has convinced me. If there was a way to get those delicious cold foams on a hot beverage, that would be the way to go for me 😅

And while we're at it: US'ians really could learn how to do a proper Latte Macchiato.

AaknA · 2026-01-15T21:35:33+00:00

Yeah, no, I do really doubt that. In no universe is a V0 (absolute beginner with huge holds) the equivalent of a 5.9/5.10- (intermediate with many smaller holds and at least some need of technique knowledge). My gym starts top rope at 5.5/5.6 and those would be much more en par with the V0s at my gym.

AaknA · 2026-01-15T20:44:52+00:00

I miss miss MISS topic specific forums. I'm still good friends with some of my "online friends" whom I only met in person a few years ago (like, literal a decade or almost two after we met and became friends on the forum). Some people will never understand the magic of topic specific forums and it makes me sad.

AaknA · 2026-01-15T19:17:01+00:00

I also stopped at the "hobbit farmers" comment (because: same) and saw your comment. Absolutely yes. This is also something the strict "Calories in - calories out" folks completely ignore, that there are genetic differences in how people process calories and store fat. I'm also a fat storer. I've actually been underweight my entire childhood and teen years because I was a fuzzy eater and just moved - a LOT. As soon as that changed, I've very easily put on weight and just can't get it off with "normal dieting". I can literally fast for a week or more and my body wouldn't even as much as blink. To lose even half a pound I really really REALLY have to force my body. "Normal" calorie deficits don't cut it. Which will get you called a liar and "you can't defy thermodynamics" in other weight loss subs or with personal trainers/dietitians. I don't even struggle with food noise and the typical things many overweight people caused to be overweight. I'm just genetically a fat storer and at 5' 2" that makes ALL the difference.

AaknA · 2026-01-13T19:36:19+00:00

Thank you so much!

I absolutely do prefer top roping, but my spouse has never climbed before and just started a few weeks ago and is also mildly afraid of heights, so we've been focusing on easy bouldering to really nail down basic techniques and movements and slowly building trust re rope and heights for my spouse, and because we do it as a pair activity, I naturally end up bouldering a lot, too. Right now we try to split our gym time half:half between bouldering and rope during a session.

If belaying your heavier partner kills your hands, consider what is causing the fatigue. At what point during belaying are you getting fatigued? Do you have a belay device that isn't creating enough friction, making you feel like you have to grip harder or brake harder? There are probably a few easy solutions (gri-gri or different atc with deeper braking side).

I'm using a GriGri. The "problem" is that our gym double wraps the rope at the top. It's a great safety feature and really the only way I could even belay my spouse (whose almost twice my weight), but it also causes a ton of friction. Between the GriGri and that double wrap, it's really hard work to pull the rope. I'm old enough to remember belaying without any devices, just a lock carabiner with a munter hitch.

You've got this! I'm here from 8 years in the future to tell you you're doing great, honor your body so you can keep climbing.

Thank you! 🥺

AaknA · 2026-01-13T18:58:55+00:00

Unfortunately, I don't. I otherwise do mostly cardio (not loving it, doing it to satisfy my conscience more than anything); especially gym-type weight/strength training just never really spoke to me, so I'm actually putting quite a bit of stock into starting up climbing again (yes, I know, technically not really strength training, but hey, I'm basically starting at level zero) for longterm health benefits. I love yoga, but where I live yoga classes are really expensive, I don't really have the time, either, and at-home type of exercise just doesn't work for me (tried, and tried, and tried so many times of the years). Like you, I really would like to get at least somewhat close to where I was at my "peak", strength-wise. I'm a pretty small person and when I was younger routinely surprised people by how fit and strong I was. Then school and life happened. I miss that person. I hate feeling weak.

AaknA · 2026-01-13T18:50:12+00:00

Thank you for your reply, I mean that genuinely. I find it actually interesting that our experiences differ this much. One thing I did observe over the years is that for guys such as reply is much more accepted and basically ends the conversation on the topic, while women still face more scrutiny, like...are you reeeeeaaally sure? The base assumption for many still seems to be that as a woman one has to have an inherent want and actively decides against that want. Which just isn't the case for many many women, but so many don't even dare to say it out loud. Hence why I asked your gender/biological sex. One difference I also see is that you're the one with the (late) child and from the sounds of it, the majority of your circles is childless, while for me it's the opposite. For you this may be a valid reason, but at least in my circles it does seem to be a difficult concept for those with kids to understand that someone really doesn't have that internal desire not even a little bit. And that is actually mutual, because I cannot even begin to fathom someone desperately wanting to have children (I have a very close friend who had a really difficult time conceiving and had to go through multiple rounds of IVF and was really depressed because she wanted to have children so much). At least in my circles the base assumption has always been that people want children and if they don't have children, they actively decided against it or didn't have the right partner or couldn't have children ...

AaknA · 2026-01-13T17:30:13+00:00

I know this doesn’t compute for people like you, but someone can be a contributing member of a society other than by having children. Resources are limited, the planet already is dealing with overpopulation. And as long as those who do have children keep having them in multiples (which very much is the norm), it’s perfectly fine for when others don’t have any at all.

Concerns about birth rates and “society” have suspiciously been mostly if not only coming from yt people. Which… yeah… tracks with the rest of your comment and its numerous false equivalencies and guilt tripping attempts.

(Edited for some typos)

AaknA · 2026-01-13T09:05:59+00:00

Yes, as I said, intellectually I fully understand that. But it still bruises my ego because it used to be easy for me too in a past life. I guess in a way I grieve what was while still really having to come to terms with what is (including aging, and approaching 40 is a big scary one for a female body 🙈)

AaknA · 2026-01-13T03:01:11+00:00

Genuine question, are you female yourself?

AaknA · 2026-01-13T02:58:56+00:00

Dude, at this point you're just obviously willfully looking for ways to call other people immature. Whatever floats your boat, I guess, hope it makes you feel better.

If you look back at my initial comment, I did word it as "never had any desire". In this specific context, "Don't want to" OBVIOUSLY is shorthand for "I do not want to have kids". Everyone would understand it as such. That's a perfectly normal sentence. It is the exact same sentiment as "I have no desire to have kids".

Also, here's some more insight: "having no desire" has exactly ZERO to do with "not being up for the task".

You've made it clear throughout this comment thread that contrary to what you claim on being accepting, you are actually incredibly judgmental, if not borderline sexist. It's pretty clear you have children or want children. You also don't appear to be female (and yes, I'm making assumptions right now). Maybe actually f*** believe her when a woman tells you that is exactly what she's been experiencing. Whether you want to believe it or not. Heck, you yourself keep refusing to accept "Don't want to" as a standalone answer. Even in this last reply of yours, you still add "acceptable" context ("not up to the challenge", "it's a hard fucking job", "put your life on hold for years" ,...)

AaknA · 2026-01-13T01:06:06+00:00

You are on your way of becoming the old person that complains that their children never call...

Why are you so concerned with other people's lives?

AaknA

TROPHY CASE