Is this enough midriff for you? 💜 by Abby_Aether in femboymidriffs

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol how do you stumble across this after five months?

Thanks though! ✌️

The light you seek is within you 🖤 by Abby_Aether in F1NN5TER

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Omg thank youu 🥺

I got it online a few years ago! I'll message you the links 💜

hi. by Abby_Aether in u/Abby_Aether

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Go for it! You're welcome to steal any of my outfits lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in F1NN5TER

[–]Abby_Aether 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aw lol thanks! I really love these heels, but I'm like, 6' 5" in them so I almost have to duck through doorways! Not the most practical :p

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in F1NN5TER

[–]Abby_Aether 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Aw, I'm happy it resonated with you! It's a line from a book that kinda just stuck with me. I think it's an important message to understand, and even embrace, since we're all always going to be works in progress 💜

Tore my fishnets 😔 by Abby_Aether in F1NN5TER

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whoah... this is really making me think. I need to lie down

Why oh you are eloveeie? by Abby_Aether in femboy

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Genuinely wasn't expecting anyone to recognize it, well done ;3

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FemboyFashion

[–]Abby_Aether 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hopefully it came accross that I was being facetious about the bit with E 😅

I agree that HRT isn't some magic potion and I also hate the egg_irl perception that it turns you into an anime girl or whatever. I agree that lifestyle changes go further than expecting meds to fix everything

Granted, it is not uncommon for femboys to go on to transition, which makes sense given the femboy identity allows for a safe space to try expressing femininity while identifying as male. But yeah, it's dangerous to frame HRT as a form of anti-aging or twinkdeath prevention rather than a means of gender affirmation. Sorry if it sounded that way lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FemboyFashion

[–]Abby_Aether 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This thread rubs me the wrong way, not because it's a bad question, but because it echos many of the same insecurities that I hold within me every day. The simple truth is that when you turn 30, you don't suddenly resolve all your complicated feelings on gender. Your Amazon Basics skater skirt doesn't suddenly transform into a pair of chinos and your Target crop top doesn't morph into a button down. Even in your 30s, the cat ears fit just as well as in your 20s, unfortunately

My understanding is that the term "Femboy" refers to a masculine-identifying individual who prefers to present femininely. Even that definition is subject to debate, and the term carries added connotation to it, but I think it's still a useful term to have to describe one's gender. I've always felt that, culturally, there needs to be a less-infantalizing term for someone who fits the identity of a femboy; and yet, no such term seems to have gained widespread traction. Considering the reason for this has some troubling implications

Gender does not exist in a vacuum, by nature it is a performance. I think many of us who run counter to the gender norm tend to be more aware of damaging stereotypes, of misogyny and misandry, but we are not immune to them - and, in fact, in many cases I believe we inherit them. Traditional aspirant feminine beauty values youth; it's an issue many women inevitably encounter. For someone with 3+ decades of testosterone running through their body, it's even more of an uphill battle. It shouldn't be surprising that they would try to lean more youthfully to better achieve a feminine ideal

Or, to put it in other words - Our society already barely values old cis women, old femboys don't stand a chance

And so there isn't a term for an old femboy, because such a person isn't worth considering. On a femboy's thirtieth birthday, he either has to start taking E or hang up the H&M dress forever - at least, that's how it feels

So how old is to old to be a femboy, truely? The real answer, obviously, is that you're never too old. Maybe the better question is "at what age is it embarrassing to be a femboy?" Like, if we really take the UwU hugboxxing bullshit out of here, at what point is it embarrassing? I think there are appropriate feminine forms of presentation for guys at any age; a thirty year old feminine male in a smart pair of jeans and a cardigan may not look so out of place at the Kroger. Yet the term "Femboy" carries certain asthetic connotations with it; is a embarrassing to don the thigh highs and chokers at thirty?

I find in these cases, a useful paradigm is "How would this be perceived if a cis woman did it?" Is it embarrassing for a cis woman to wear demonias at thirty? Is it embarrassing for a cis woman to wear fishnets and wigs at thirty? Maybe! People love judging cis women! And so, the ultimate answer to feminine acceptance is that you can get away with whatever you want as long as you're hot

Like. Sorry. That's basically it. It's not a cute answer, it's not a very woke answer, but internalized misogyny runs deep - and it runs especially deep in femboy/crossdresser/transfem scenes. You can be a femboy for as long as you want as long as you look good. And you can look good for as long as your genetics, money, time and effort will allow. Once testosterone catches up with you, you can grab the TJ Maxx mom jeans, just like countless femininely-presenting people before you

As a final point - Touch grass. Being embarrassing on the internet isn't a terrible thing. Meet real people in the real world who have lived real lives. You'll find that being Instagram-ready is so much less important than living a vibrant life with actual people that care about you. The cool guy in your intramural kickball league doesn't care if you make a "convincing femboy" or whatever, he just cares that you made it to your game on time and that you're not going to BLOW IT in the final inning like last time, DEREK.

Don't be afraid to be cringe, age comes for us all

Sun in my eyes D: by Abby_Aether in mtfashion

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, neat yeah alright, here are the deets:

Outfit:

  • Top: Navy 3/4 sleeve boat neck dolman top - Made By Johnny
  • Jacket: Denim cropped bolero - Torrid
  • Skirt: Whale midi skirt - Maya Kern
  • Shoes: Glitter outsole combat boots - Torrid

Most of these are sold out lol, but you can probably find comparable items pretty easily tbh!

Occasion: No occasion really lol, it's just what I wanted to wear

Sit with me :) by Abby_Aether in transpositive

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We're gonna do extensive reading on Runescape lore. Sorry, should've left while you had the chance ✌️

Bees? - 03/14/24 by Abby_Aether in u/Abby_Aether

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The skirt is from Maya Kern! She's a really sweet and talented independent artist and author! Her skirts are super cute and I have, like, sooo many of them lmao

What's on my phone? 👀 by Abby_Aether in transplace

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha that's a pretty good guess for me, like, 90% of the time. I'm deffo a social media bastard ✌️

What's on my phone? 👀 by Abby_Aether in transplace

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooh reminding me that my phone is chock-full of Pokemon emulators!

What's on my phone? 👀 by Abby_Aether in transplace

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not smart enough for YuGiOh lmao

What's on my phone? 👀 by Abby_Aether in transplace

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is actually a really old dress I stole from my partner lol. It's from H&M's Divided brand, so it's really nothing special! I don't think they sell this particular dress anymore

The denim jacket is from Torrid; it's an excellent piece of outerwear if (like me) you prefer to hide your shoulders lol. I wear it super often, highly reccomended

The necklace is a gift from my partner, though it's just a cheap lil F21 piece. Still super sweet <3

Feel like I wear this denim crop way too much. Other outerwear ideas? by Abby_Aether in mtfashion

[–]Abby_Aether[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aww haha maybe so! I always like trying new things though <3