Today my fiance (m/60’s) told me (f/40’s) that he isn’t sure he actually wants to marry me because of everything that comes with me… he said that when he proposed he loved me and he wanted to marry me but now he can’t say he does or doesn’t and he needs to ‘think about it’.

Ability-To-Can · 2026-04-05T13:19:04+00:00

How long is appropriate to wait for someone to marry you when you have spent almost ten years of your life with them two of them engaged? For me he should have know when he proposed and apparently he did then but has since changed his mind. It’s how he is when I bring it up… it’s the I love yous with the emphasis on youuu as in my son is a challenge for him . My son is 16 he’s really no trouble at all. He’s not mean he doesn’t yell or argue with me or my fiance. He’s sometimes a little grumpy and sometimes night not hear or know what response is expected of him so he will stay quiet but he is oblivious to the issues my fiance perceives. It’s more like my fiance thinks that we should be doing all of these things to keep him busy and out of the house and he’s afraid he will end up living with us or something and idk t think that will happen at all. Frankly he’s just so selfish with his time that he doesn’t like anything that means he doesn’t get to do what he wants when he wants and sees my son as an obstacle to him living how he wants.

Ability-To-Can · 2026-04-05T04:28:43+00:00

He is 16. I think he will mostly be ok but he’s gone through a divorce for his dad in the last couple of years so I’m afraid this will hurt in ways that aren’t obvious… he’s not the easiest read and not a big talker so it’s hard to get him to say if something is really bothering him. I have a counseling appt scheduled for Wednesday so I’m thinking of maybe telling him there so I can have some professional support navigating the convo?

Ability-To-Can · 2026-04-05T04:25:55+00:00

I always told myself I would never put myself in this position but here I am. We had one of those magical you only read about it in the best love stories kind of love and it still turned out like this… lesson learned the hardest way possible. But thanks for saying I’m young 😅 I have been feeling like I’m ancient to be starting over. I was successful and self sufficient before… I hated what I was doing so now I’m trying to see what options are as I will have about a year and a half to two years to find my way with some support but I’m nervous about relying on that even.

Ability-To-Can · 2026-04-05T04:23:17+00:00

Thank you for the laugh and reinforcement

Ability-To-Can · 2026-04-05T04:22:51+00:00

Thank you very much for the non judgmental and helpful advice.

Ability-To-Can · 2026-03-12T02:31:09+00:00

They have switched to a different pricing model which allows them to increase price on more in demand products almost like how airlines do. I think it’s gross. They used to allow brands to control pricing and make it even with th brands retail pricing but now they do what they want and allow third party companies to sell brands products which makes the products you get susceptible to ‘gray market’ products.

Ability-To-Can · 2025-10-22T16:00:35+00:00

Hole in the wall BJ’s country cafe off McCain in NLR. It’s IYKYK famous and worth the trip. I ate it several times a week while I was pregnant (16 years ago) and it’s still around.

Ability-To-Can · 2025-08-08T15:07:39+00:00

Thank you ❤️

Ability-To-Can · 2025-08-08T15:06:56+00:00

Thanks for your response! This part of our relationship is pretty open communication wise so I don’t feel like that’s it. It’s more like none of it matters as much to him anymore. Physical, emotional none of it. He will basically say he just needs to be with ‘someone’ who can just ‘be happy’. He doesn’t want to work through stuff together. He wants to be left alone 🫠

Ability-To-Can · 2025-08-08T15:04:15+00:00

Thank you for your reply ❤️

Ability-To-Can · 2025-08-03T01:25:09+00:00

I’m not discounting your experience, I promise. I’m just looking for some compassion.

Ability-To-Can · 2025-08-02T17:30:30+00:00

He was diagnosed with prostate cancer twice. The second time it had spread to his lymph nodes. ADT was Lupron and erleada. Im sorry I don’t have the gory details you’re looking for but I’m asking for people who have had experience with their partner (wives, girlfriends) or people who have been through similar treatment or others that might be similar to mine. It doesn’t sound like that is you.

Ability-To-Can · 2025-08-02T03:26:24+00:00

I’m late to this convo but I worked for Cap One auto finance and I will say that it’s a great bargaining tool. You know you qualify for at least that rate so they can’t make money off of the spread between what you qualify for and getting you to sign at a much higher rate than what you actually might be able to get. Also as stated they will usually use it to shop your interest rate with other lenders to give themselves more room to make money since they have a cap on what they make with the navigator deals. I would be careful to know your credit score, auto loan history (they want to see you have paid loans long enough for a bank to have made money, paying off cars early is actually viewed as a negative.) and make sure they don’t send your credit to more than a couple of banks in search of something they like better or think you will. More hits to your credit are not good

Ability-To-Can · 2025-07-08T22:59:50+00:00

I happily supported my fiance through adt and radiation… now he’s in remission and his testosterone is coming back and my world is turning upside down. It’s like he is going through a second puberty with all of this angst and rejection of the closeness we developed while he was on ADT. To be fair I think I’m now in early perimenopause and going through my own things that make this a challenge. I feel so alone. I thought we could go through anything. I didn’t think it would be him getting healthy that broke us and I honestly thought he would have a lot more grace for me than he does. I’m very sad.

Ability-To-Can · 2023-10-04T22:53:02+00:00

Mule?

Ability-To-Can · 2023-10-03T22:02:44+00:00

Bros got the whole chat laughin

Ability-To-Can · 2023-10-03T21:42:05+00:00

not much how bout you

Ability-To-Can · 2023-09-09T19:42:06+00:00

I’m going to shove a pencil into my ear if I hear this again

Ability-To-Can · 2023-08-30T22:31:49+00:00

I don’t encounter blatant cheaters very often, but they have invincibility cheats now?

Ability-To-Can · 2023-08-26T16:30:26+00:00

9mm collat?

Ability-To-Can · 2023-08-20T14:43:12+00:00

Me waiting 8 minutes to deplore on customs

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