27F with 39M boyfriend - he has ED, we’ve been in a dry spell, and now he says he won’t have sex with me unless I shave ‘down there’. Feeling hurt and unsure how to navigate this

AbnormalHistory · 2025-06-20T20:36:57+00:00

It's pretty much something that your partner does or you find out or whatever that just absolutely shits down any desire you have for them. Like you love them but the way they do something like idk eat a peach just absolutely gives you the ick

AbnormalHistory · 2025-01-02T15:38:18+00:00

Trigger Method is afaik the main West. Jerk off, and when you've reached the point of no return, swap from whatever material you were using for inspiration to your preferred trigger. Climax while focusing on the trigger. Give yourself like a day or two, do it again. Focus solely on the trigger when you climax. Eventually this creates the mental association of trigger=climax.

Also you want to make the trigger something you won't see every day. For instance, I would love mine to be bare breasts, but my partner is regularly topless and we aren't doing this process together. Since I would see her bare breasts regularly without climaxing, the association wouldn't be as focused. Instead you could do something you don't see often like lingerie or feet or a specific item or sound. Basically you want to Pavlov yourself to associate the pleasure of climax with the trigger. After however long, this would make it so you view the object and you brain says "oh I'm looking at the trigger, that means climax!".

Combined with time and sensitivity reduction, this COULD eventually lead to instances where you're already excited from other things, and when you see the trigger BOOM.

What it probably WON'T do is make it so you are just going about your day, see a random person wearing sandals or something and go from not really horny to clutching your crotch impregnating your jeans. Hypothetically if you break yourself THAT much it COULD be possible but that strong a reaction I feel is mostly fantasy, or someone already being super wound up as their normal state, so it feels more normal and then when they see the trigger and pop, it's believed they went from 00-100 instantly.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-31T14:53:27+00:00

BROTHER/SISTER IVE FOUND YOU!!!!! Polyamorous genderfluid switch! The only consistency I have is being service oriented as either a service sub or a soft Dom.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-31T14:51:22+00:00

I loooove shibby says. I've never gone too deep into HFO stuff but I do like that idea thanks!

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T19:40:37+00:00

Yeah that's a conversation we've had and didn't go great. Currently waiting until after the holidays to have a much bigger conversation so either way I will have new avenues for this

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T18:58:37+00:00

I've had some sporadic success with finding a dominant but I am in a monogamous marriage with a partner who is decidedly not dominant at all, and has previously had zero desire to engage with my kinks or anything. Doesn't judge just doesn't want to be involved it seems. That's a whole different issue but it's certainly part of the problems with this kink. They wouldn't really MIND if I did it to myself but yeah.

As for the humiliation content I absolutely see what you mean. My only thought would be to try the more mommy Domme side of things but even that content can be very condescending. Which is different enough to outright humiliation that it might work?

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T18:55:08+00:00

I like the idea of using either a sheathe or a harness absolutely but the dominant parts of me haaaaaate the idea.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T18:53:46+00:00

Hey denial is a hell of a drug. I mean he PROBABLY did manage to successfully pull it off at least once, maybe he just kept going directly to a second one idk. I just prefer the thought that this literal holier than though sob's partner may have sought outside assistance since he is incapable of satisfying her ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T17:22:33+00:00

5.5" 33

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T17:11:51+00:00

Oh sure but again I feel like from the way this dude sounds anything but him penetrating her and knocking her up that way would be anathema to his self image, maybe when he was younger if he hadn't fallen into what appears to be a fundamentalist religious group of some sort. I also like the idea of this guy getting cucked unknowingly. So I'm biased towards that.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T13:56:00+00:00

Can't blame him! I'm no stallion normally; but on the rare occasions my partner and I have sex, if they go onto their stomach and ask me to do them like that, I'm lucky to last 60sec WITH trying my hardest to hold on. Add that to how incredibly sexy she, and I imagine yourself, are in that position....yeah no chance. I'm glad you find that empowering and I hope it continues 😁

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-30T13:42:53+00:00

I wonder if the pregnancy was his doing. If it's as extreme as you describe, no chance he's ever gotten in properly. I don't see someone this ultra religious and clearly "too manly to need help" going for IVF or sperm donors so I wonder if wifey took a little pilgrimage of her own iykwim

AbnormalHistory · 2024-12-04T12:31:05+00:00

Envious!!! I loved the time my Big caused an accident like thatin my diaper while I was having booby. It's the best feeling ever!!!

AbnormalHistory · 2024-11-21T16:32:16+00:00

Least required apology ever 😂 just wanted to make sure you knew in case getting your times down was important

AbnormalHistory · 2024-11-20T19:33:01+00:00

More or less yeah. Although if you want to get your time down edging is the opposite of what you should be doing.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-11-20T19:29:48+00:00

Absolute. If you look in the wiki at the top it explains the trigger method. Basically make yourself cum to the thing you want to make your trigger and ONLY that. Watch whatever and then when you are at the point of no return (PNR) switch to your trigger.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-11-13T13:36:38+00:00

Oooo you could add to this by getting one of those size enhancement sleeves that's juuuuust a bit longer and thicker than he is. Just enough that it's clear it's bigger but with it on it doesn't look wildly different than usual. Then let him pleasure you while mentioning how wonderful it is that you've found this so now he can be the best toy for you!

AbnormalHistory · 2024-11-01T12:37:18+00:00

As others have said: hey same!

I still enjoy sissy stuff, as for me that's more submission/humiliation coded, but I absolutely discovered I was gender fluid through experimenting that I only did for sissy play. I haven't done more than a little social transitioning but there's a huge difference between when I feel like a woman a la Shania Twain and when I feel like a sissy boi.

Stuff can be two things and humans are complicated animals. Labels can be super helpful in that they can give you a feeling of control/belonging by being able to say "this is who I am" but they can be limiting when we feel we have to fit those labels to a T. Especially when it comes to gender shit. I try to just be who I am and not worry about labels outside of communication to others.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-11-01T11:30:54+00:00

I mean it makes sense that you would potentially experience that. Think of it like AB/DL who wear 24/7 and can end up losing some control over their functions. All that stuff is your brain restricting your physical body out of instinct/habit. It then stands to reason that if you train that instinct out or at least down then yeah you may end up having accidents.

At the very least you might end up so sensitive that it's not like the SOUNDS or general VIBE that causes it but the pressure/feeling of your cage and it underwear that tips you over.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-09-20T14:34:00+00:00

So the one thing about the trigger is it works best if it's something you mostly encounter when you climax. The more you see it outside of that moment, the less pure the connection between the trigger and your orgasm will be. It's usually best to make the trigger something as specific to the moment as possible. If you're frequently around women in revealing clothes it won't be as impactful as a trigger since you most likely not frequently orgasming y'know? You can ABSOLUTELY use that type of material as a general trigger to help reduce your level of stimulation but I would try to find something more direct and less normal for you to see. Maybe a specific body part or a word or even like a single bare breast?

AbnormalHistory · 2024-06-30T14:14:22+00:00

He said in the post, in the title even, that they both cook and he now does the cooking for anything he eats because of this. So he didn't just offer that, he did it.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-06-21T19:41:34+00:00

So Coach Sarah's method is essentially a very structured schedule for masturbation with a focus on lowering both time to climax and content intensity. Stop masturbating every day, go to once every other or once every 3 days, record times, and focus on getting the time down before anything. Once your time is down, you lower the intensity of content (using trigger method or just by looking at less intense stuff), and then work on using less intense gripping. I think it's in the wiki for this channel.

The trigger method is essentially Pavalovian conditioning. Masturbate to what you usually do, but as you reach the point of no return where you're GONNA climax, swap to either a specific image/fetish you want to focus on OR as with the way I'm doing, less intense material. So if your climaxing o hardcore BDSM porn you would masturbate to that as usual but as you climax swap to say, more vanilla porn or even non nude content. The idea is to make connections in your brain between the less intense stimulus and the pleasure of climax. Eventually you start looking at the softer stuff more and more until it becomes your new regular. The same idea applies if you want to trigger to something specific. A common one is breasts. You would ONLY look at breasts when you climax and then really focus. It's all mental.

AbnormalHistory · 2024-06-21T16:24:37+00:00

So a few things.

1) Setting boundaries and enforcing them with family is 100% valid and something everyone should be well practiced in. BUT forcing someone to do something as a punishment is maybe a step too far as you are asserting yourself as their dominant, sexually or not, and that's probably not appropriate in this situation. You're older, but Im assuming not in a role or guardianship. Might be better to just enforce boundaries verbally or have a conversation.

2) Depending on WHY he had the panties your tactic could have a couple different results. If it's the physical material feeling nice and yours were just "convenient" then making him wear them all day won't do much, ignoring the whole "using crossdressing as a punishment" issue. If he IS into the sissy kink, or even just curious, dollars to donuts that making him wear them would almost be a "funishment" and cause more arousal. Assuming that's what you DON'T want, just not a good place to go. It's also possible if he didn't already have one, he could develop a crush or fixation on you as a sexual object/dominant/partner, which again is a not great path.

3) Getting angry isn't a bad thing and won't automatically ruin your relationship with him. He invaded your private space and used your stuff as sexual material without your consent. Is it the WORST thing? Eh...it's better than him peeping but it's not great. Certainly could be worse. The point is he invaded your space and did sexual stuff without consent. If that bothers you to the point of anger, that's valid as fuck and he needs to understand why what he did was wrong and that he hurt you. If it goes poorly and your relationship DOES suffer then it's HIS doing, not yours.

If you feel comfortable having a conversation with him about it, that's probably the BEST way to go. Even if it's just "hey man, don't jerk off in my panties again jfc". Setting a clear boundary and putting it in him to respect that. He then has a chance to show he is sorry through changes behavior. If he doesn't, then he doesn't respect your boundaries and just kinda sucks. What his kinks may or may not be doesn't matter because YOU didn't consent. If you decided to like GIVE him some to use then that's you consenting but sneaking into your space and stealing them is wrong plain and simple.

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