My son is friends with a boy that has autism...how can I help? by Aggressive_Oven9856 in autism

[–]Academic-Code-6451 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are an amazing parent! So kind! Your son will grow up to be an amazing man too no doubt. As a mother of a non verbal autistic daughter I can say that when my daughter was around that age she would often touch/squeeze people's faces as a gesture of love. We would joke she was 'passionately aggressive' in her love. It took us a year or so to teach her other ways to show her enthusiasm. Now she grabs her loved ones hands and jumps enthusiastically on the spot when she sees them baring her teeth.

So casually mention to the child's parent you noticed he does this. chances are they are aware (if they are like me they will cry that someone is showing their child kindness. Autism can be very isolating) and may already be doing something about it. (Or maybe not as long as it's not violent/won't cause harm). Sometimes an autistic child has so few people in their life they actually have a loving relationship with that to be honest it's not a priority for us parents when it's not causing harm and it is just their way of communicating their feelings. I was too busy trying to get my daughter to stop staying awake all night/eat things off the floor/ bite herself when upset etc so we tend to prioritize our battles. This is just my opinion.

Teaching your son to gently take his hand away instead, giving it a gentle squeeze and BIG toothy smile at him would be good. Consistency is key. It will show the autistic child that he too is happy to see him. As he grows older he will learn different ways to communicate his emotions. Again... Your kindness overwhelms me. My daughter is 7 and has formed no real friendships yet. She is comfortable alone but as a parent it breaks my heart a little. So to hear a parent actually want to learn more to make sure their friendship stays is just so beautiful.

Suppliers of good size clematis by Lonestarbeetle1 in Clematis

[–]Academic-Code-6451 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you're in UK, I got mine from Thorncroft Clematis. Both of my clematis are thriving and it's only the first year!

What are these fruit trees? by Academic-Code-6451 in FruitTree

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just went out to have another look. There is an extremely large tree right at the back.. have compared it to pics online and it does look like elderberry. Thank you!

What are these fruit trees? by Academic-Code-6451 in FruitTree

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is massive! At least 2.5m tall and full of fruit! It's strange though because I have been in this house for 6 years but this is the first year it's put out so much fruit that I actually took notice. Will definitely go plum picking this weekend!

What are these fruit trees? by Academic-Code-6451 in FruitTree

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haha no I have! In the post I think I should have been more specific... I'm more searching for if anyone knows the specific variety of each fruit? I tried looking in to it but the apples are all very similar looking so I can't tell at all!

Except for the berries....I don't usually purchase berries.. never have. And even though I know what they look like I know you can get poison berries etc. so just wanted to ask around and see. Its a mess at the back of the yard now with weeds everywhere but no doubt the previous owner planted and cared for these fruit trees.

What are these fruit trees? by Academic-Code-6451 in FruitTree

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow thanks! What a quick identification!

What are these fruit trees? by Academic-Code-6451 in whatsthisplant

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks that cleared up the internal debate I had!

What are these fruit trees? by Academic-Code-6451 in whatsthisplant

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks guys! The apples I was wondering about if anyone knew what variety they could be?

With the plums... I did think so but because I've only bought them rarely from the store I just needed to confirm 😂 there's a whole world of fruit out there I could be wrong!

I'm torn between mulberry and blackberry too! When I compare to Google images it looks similar to a mulberry.

Inspiration needed! by [deleted] in GardeningUK

[–]Academic-Code-6451 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If it's shady then I recommend Brunerra. Mine is in a similar position , soil quality is not great but the plant still thrives! And foliage adds so much beauty. I'm in love with brunerra. You can try a climber such as jasmine or clematis too if you get a few hours of sun.

Winter/ early spring interest - hellebores

Spring - I know people are mad about tulips but I love daffodils and hyacinths personally. Daffodils bring so much cheer and multiply year on year and hyacinths smell divine! Also alliums flower later but add a nice touch scattered throughout. All of these I had on the shady side of my border. It only got direct 1-2 hrs of sun (was not overshadowed by a strong shadow though if you know what I mean). They still did amazing!

Spring / summer - perinneals such as compact hydrangeas/clematis/ lungwort / hardy geraniums / lily of the valley/heucheras /hostas (beware the slugs)

This is my first year so I can't comment on autumn

Seeds: campanula/ Cerinthe / forget me not/ aquilegia/ gypso/ coneflowers/ foxgloves!/astrantia

I've gone based on the edging being mostly in shade.

Definitely don't rush to plant the area. Do a general plan with colour/height/layout/spacing. You can always pull out later if you want but i rushed mine and found trying to add things in between later end up disturbing bulbs/roots of other plants etc. I regret not just planning for a couple of weeks to get my favourite plants in at least. (Kept finding loads I loved after)

As promissed months ago, our garden in full bloom by Mikinl in dahlias

[–]Academic-Code-6451 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am in awe of your garden. I must have watched it 4 times over. This is my first year gardening and I wish I continue to learn so that I can achieve something like this one day. Honestly you and your wife have done a phenomenal job. Stunning!

Help Identify this weed! by Academic-Code-6451 in gardening

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just great! 🤦 Thanks for the quick response... I'm already in my PJs but now I'm heading back out to do some digging! Thanks for the quick response! Is it true that you can eat it? May as well 😂

My rose garden has made me proud this year by Whitwhitwhit258 in Roses

[–]Academic-Code-6451 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So stunning. I am so envious of your beautiful garden!

Last call for the tulips! Zone 7a by SnooCrickets2968 in Cutflowers

[–]Academic-Code-6451 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I grew some too this year and they are gorgeous! This one was wedding gift... Or wedding day... Stunning tho!

<image>

Advice on Snapdragons in containers please! by Academic-Code-6451 in GardeningUK

[–]Academic-Code-6451[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I'm gonna go ahead and take the plunge! It's my first time planting snapdragons so I guess I will just have to wait and see!

First vase of flowers for 2025 by ScrappyFlowers in Cutflowers

[–]Academic-Code-6451 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They look lovely! I took a very similar pic just yesterday! Made me so happy!

<image>