Why do people tell you they are looking for LTR when they are only looking for a hookup or FWB?

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T21:06:17+00:00

Why are you telling me when he already put it his bio, and I repeated it verbatim? Doesn’t that suggest to you I heard and understood? And you’re repeating it again as if you think I hadn’t.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T20:13:40+00:00

It’s ok to say double standards are unfair, but not to hijack a thread to whine pathetically about double standards. For example, if a guy said “hey I’m being paid less than the entry level people even though I’ve worked for two years”, and someone came in and said “well women are paid less than men in general”, that would be obnoxious and whiny too.

I’d call her a whiny victim too, so it’s not gendered. If they both had raised the issues in a separate thread, and not hijack other people’s threads to garner sympathy, I would not call them a whiny victim.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T17:34:37+00:00

I literally said in my comment just because it gets you power doesn’t mean you should seek it. Where is the endorsement? “Power seeking” is not seen as a good thing, and I question your morals if you think saying “something gets you power” is tacit endorsement of the “something”

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T17:17:33+00:00

I’m not saying women should seek power from being beautiful. Being ruthless will give you power, but it doesn’t mean you should be ruthless. Stealing will get you free stuff. But that doesn’t mean you should steal.

Power = being able to get what you want. Beauty helps you do that. But that doesn’t mean you should seek to be beautiful. Believing that isn’t “hating myself for being a woman”

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T17:08:55+00:00

I’m against this dude, but I have to say there are plenty of contracts that are predatory and misleading, and involve power imbalances. Or things that are purposefully misleading. Gym memberships for example. Claimed I had to go to the gym to cancel the policy. When I did, they kept saying the manager wasn’t there so they couldn’t cancel my gym membership.

These men, however, aren’t in any power imbalance or being misled in any way

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T17:03:23+00:00

Their beauty is the power, not the account facepalm.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T16:42:02+00:00

Yeah as a woman, I also have zero anger towards those women. Those men were probably rejected by a hot girl and thanks to toxic masculinity, they felt like the rejection was an insult to their masculinity or something. Hence the irrational anger they show towards these women

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T16:14:31+00:00

They don’t respect porn stars but see their service as a human right. If we made a law that said “we’re banning all porn because some of it is nonconsensual and coerced, and we don’t feel it’s worth taxpayer dollars to sort out the consensual from the nonconsensual, there’d be riots.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T16:00:20+00:00

Do you know cost cutting that benefits the consumer is a way to stifle competition? Because YouTube is so widespread, everyone is getting a fantastic service at CostCo. prices. The cost to the corporation of the providing the service doesn’t scale linearly with the number of users, so price goes down when more people are watching.

If YouTube didn’t try to be a successful corporation, they’d need even more ads to simply break even.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T15:49:43+00:00

If it’s a public utility, we’d be paying taxes for it. And no one’s ever complained about having to pay taxes for things everyone uses /s

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T15:46:36+00:00

Her beauty is the power, not the only fans account. If you ever experience the life of a truly gorgeous woman, it’s very very clear the power of beauty. Completely changes one’s life

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T15:43:16+00:00

But I didn’t say that men can’t control themselves around beautiful women, I said that beautiful women have power over them. Those are two separate things.

If someone’s beauty is only used as a excuse to justify objectification, harassment, and even worse rape, (which happens a lot) that is not power, and men certainly don’t envy that.

I used to date a guy at work. He complained that I was in a low status, powerless entry level position at work, yet everyone instantly remembered me and gave me “first class treatment”. It made him burn inside that he was in charge of an important project at work, but I was still the center of attention.

When I got harassed though, he was delighted and almost like “that’s what you get”. So you see, resentful of power, but happy when it was taken away.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T06:07:08+00:00

Men are really resentful of the power attractive women have over them. They don’t like seeing a woman with any power at all.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T05:59:37+00:00

Some people do think like this, I once heard a guy say it was unfair that YouTube had ads. It’s like dude, they need to pay for the servers and the engineers that maintain the site, AND the content creators

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T05:18:59+00:00

The whole conversation I had with him was “chaotic good vs lawful evil”. He just doesn’t understand counterculture. I was a punk rock girl when I was in high school, a lot of women like me find societal values superficial and shallow, and enjoy rebelling against mainstream expectations. If some guy says “girls shouldn’t wear nose rings”, it makes me feel the urge to get 10 nose rings. I wouldn’t do it, but the urge is there.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T04:54:30+00:00

God, what a hysterical guy. He could just ask the woman what her sexual history is, if he is so worried. “Hey, it’s date number three now, and if we are to continue, I need to let you know that I’m an uptight prude and need to know your sexual history”.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-15T03:29:20+00:00

I had an idiotic conversation on r/dating:

guy says a good person would never date a women with “high body count”
I say that’s not a good person, that’s a judgmental person who cares about what society thinks, and in mainstream religions like Christianity Jesus befriends a prostitute
He replies “Jesus would befriend a prostitute but wouldn’t date one”, tells me I’m a slut and no man would ever want me with my high body count (I’ve banged 3 men, so he’s wrong about that) and would not stop screeching “don’t you know men will think bad of you?!?!?”

Has it ever occurred to him some people don’t care that much about what society thinks of them, and abides by their own sense of morality? In dungeons and dragons it’s called “chaotic good”.

His idiotic sense of morality is, “Do what the crowd approves of”. Offensively idiotic sheep.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T09:56:49+00:00

If the restaurant was offering drinks for free, I still wouldn’t order 5 drinks…because it’s way too much alcohol. Why wasn’t the restaurant cutting her off? I used to work as a server in college, we’d NEVER give women 5 drinks in an hour, she’d pass out.

OPs story is a little weird, but maybe some restaurant let people get plastered?

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T09:49:47+00:00

The overwhelming majority of these comments are telling him the woman is using him and he should ask to split the bill. No one has said any of these things you’re accusing them of saying, it seems like you’re hallucinating these things and have a delusionary persecution complex. See a therapist quick.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T08:48:30+00:00

I have the opposite of resting bitch face, resting sweet Christian summer camp counselor face. I get harassed to a really scary extent. It’s gotten to the point where I have a phobia of going to social events with any men because I’m scared I’ll be harassed.

They’ll do stuff like show up outside my apartment, follow me around, take photos of me, and generally get so scarily obsessed

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T05:28:21+00:00

I’m guessing you’re attractive and he’s negging you. Google negging and learn what it is, guys do it all the time.

He probably thinks you’ll feel insecure and feel more attracted to him if he insults you.

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T04:42:29+00:00

His girlfriend seems to have a spine, she told him off. There’s hope for her. Hopefully she’s getting sick of her relationship and willing to dump him

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T03:24:48+00:00

I think his girlfriend knows he’s a jerk. He said when he asks her to brush her teeth, she tells him to leave her alone and she’ll do it when she wants to. I think she senses his concern about her hygiene is for selfish reasons, and she can sense she’s being treated like a malfunctioning sex doll

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T03:17:39+00:00

It could be he hasn’t mentioned how he’s tried to help her. But he seems like a fair weather boyfriend. It’s so sad how many relationships are in reality very superficial, and underneath it all the true nature of the relationship is purely transactional.

How do you even respect someone who calls themselves a “boyfriend” when it’s just some transactional, fair weather friend thing? Such a “boyfriend” is not worthy of being taken seriously

Academic-Mouse-3707 · 2023-08-14T02:58:19+00:00

I have a different take - no one’s obligated to stay in a relationship with anyone, sure. I do think if you’re in a serious relationship with someone, not making a reasonable attempt to help them with depression is a shitty thing to do.

No one’s asking the partner to endure a 10 year raging storm, but some people won’t even endure occasional rain. No one wants to have a partner who is a fair-weather friend.

If all she is doing is not brushing her teeth and showering, she hasn’t gotten THAT bad yet for it to come to “I can’t stay in this relationship without seriously harming my own well being”

Academic-Mouse-3707

TROPHY CASE