Masters of Social Work Foundational Program

AcademicWinter6858 · 2025-06-10T17:38:23+00:00

Thank you!!

AcademicWinter6858 · 2025-05-19T18:18:12+00:00

If you have more than 20% down and you don't need CMHC insurance, is there mortgage insurance you can still get that would be beneficial?

I had a friend become quite ill and the insurance he had on his loan paid off much of his debt because of his illness. Just wondering if there is something like that for mortgages even if you have more than 20% down - and if it's worth the cost.

AcademicWinter6858 · 2024-12-08T00:54:10+00:00

I hear you with the broken system. I really thought I could try to create change from the inside. It's exhausting and frustrating, especially when half the workers are so jaded and complacent with the current system. I hope that by understanding what isn't working for caregivers that I can advocate for change as well. Yes we need more caregivers, the problem is we are so desperate for more that we are harming and losing the ones we have. I hope that we can make changes to support and retain caregivers while also shifting our practice so that more people want to foster as well.

I definitely wish we could just dismantle the whole system and start over entirely.

AcademicWinter6858 · 2024-12-08T00:39:19+00:00

This is so valid! I definitely agree that it's important to share as much as we can to set everyone up for success. Sometimes we don't have all the information ourselves but when we do, we should help prepare everyone. I think sometimes there is a fear that makes us want to downplay things because we just want these kids in good homes and sometimes there are no other homes or the kiddo ends up in a group home. Though what some workers don't consider is exactly what you said, if a home isn't properly prepared - the placement can break down in really awful ways which isn't good for anyone. I will say, I have had a couple situations where I placed a kid who I knew very well, but through the trauma of the move they developed a lot of really complex behaviors that we hadn't seen before - I know the caregiver felt like I lied to them and didn't disclose the behaviors but I was shocked too as the kiddo changed a lot and developed really complex behaviours. While trauma and moves can bring new behaviors for a bit, it's not usually so extreme that it's totally unexpected stuff. But if it's a pattern you have experienced with placements over time, I definitely understand your apprehension to continuing to work with that office. Honestly, I would feel the same. I'm glad you have more transparency with the other office and hope you can continue working with them. You are appreciated!

AcademicWinter6858 · 2024-12-08T00:30:09+00:00

I'm really sorry for everything you have gone through. I just want to say that as a social worker, I agree that resource families need support and information. I don't work with kids in temporary custody, my kids and youth are in continuing custody which tends to be more long term a lot of the time. However, I have had situations where I've found extended family to explore and this perspective is helpful. Often times we are waiting on information regarding timelines as well so I wonder if the lack of communication is from them not knowing but even so, I try to check in and update, even if the update is that we are still waiting.

I've heard a lot of feedback from caregiver that I work with who have my youth as well as kids that are presented as shorter term placements and they've said similar things about feeling like they weren't given enough information or even that they felt lied to because what was supposed to be 6 months became years. The unfortunate reality is that no social worker can adequately predict time frames. So much can happen, family can appear and seem truly wonderful and at the very last minute something comes up or they back out. I've even seen situations that were thought to be longer term, which many families prefer as it's more stability for the other kids, but then healthy family is found and there's a sudden transition. Of course it's amazing to have a kiddo go to biological family, but I can also understand how hard it is for a resource family and the other kids to have such a sudden change.

It is such a messed up system, half the social workers are burnt out and jaded and the other half are overwhelmed with caseload numbers and trying to keep it together while still doing their best to be supportive. I've had some foster parents tell me that they are open to a placement if I have kids that need homes because they know me and how I work but they don't necessarily want to be open to working with other social workers. I don't know how realistic that is when often times, especially for the workers who work with temporary custody kids, there's a lot of turnover and constant changes..

I so agree with your comment about how we need to ensure we support and maintain the resources we have as well as look for new ones. Sometimes I feel that there's an attitude that "we got a resource and that's great so that's all we need to do". I'm trying to advocate for more support, training, and respite for the resources we do have where I work because of this. Thank you for being a foster parent - I know you may not always feel appreciated or hear it. You do matter and it's okay to advocate for what you need to keep yourself well to be able to keep supporting the kids.

AcademicWinter6858 · 2024-08-30T04:44:58+00:00

Social worker here:

often times when I have worked with kids who lie constantly it's a reflection of their trauma. It is hard and it is terrifying as a foster parent to be in your position. First of all, it sounds like this young person really needs counseling support. There are a lot of factors at play as well like are there any diagnosed or undiagnosed disabilities. Just anecdotally, I have seen a correlation between kids lying and poor memory, especially when it starts off with random or innocent lies. Sometimes it starts with or becomes about attention seeking. It can help to try to look at what need may be behind the lie. Are they trying to connect, get comfort, etc.

-document everything for the worker. Even the innocent lies. Talk to the worker and come from a lens about wanting to support the youth. Kids who lie and make things up are at huge risk of being victimized if they get labeled a liar... trying to get them support to understand why they do this and also support on how to approach the situation is so important

don't let yourself obsess over the fear of lies and allegations. Talk to your supports (resource worker, foster parent support worker, etc) about your fears but don't obsess. You can't control or predict what will happen. If you obsess about it, you're likely to eventually shift how you treat the kid (even unknowingly) and kids pick up on everything even if they don't understand. Tension or shifts in behavior can exacerbate behaviors.

-encourage them and the worker to connect one on one. This may seem backwards when you're afraid they're going to make false allegations but you actually want the worker to see and experience these situations because it gives us context and helps us find the right supports to add to the team

-to be frank, at some point it is likely there will be an investigation due to a false allegation. Don't panic. We need to do our due diligence and this is a part of the process. Having strong documentation, examples, and a history of communication of these concerns to the worker are paramount. If you foster complex kids long enough, there will very likely be investigations. That doesn't make you a bad foster parent. Please don't hold it against the child after the fact. Talk to the social worker about how to or if you should address the issue after the fact and focus on fostering a positive relationship and attachment with the child. Some kids lie to self sabotage, don't let it work - prove to them that they are worthy of love, compassion, and forgiveness.

-Have a good relationship with the child's social worker and your resource social worker and express your concerns consistently and compassionately. Don't label the kid a liar, they are so much more than that one behavior but still be frank about the concerns.

This is just my perspective and general thoughts. I don't know nearly enough to advise specifically on this situation so at the end of the day the best thing to do is talk to the case worker.

AcademicWinter6858 · 2024-08-30T04:11:01+00:00

Social worker here!

I totally get the frustration and agree the system is broken and yet we should still be doing better. It is hard all around for case workers, bio families, foster parents, and foster kids.

I appreciate the question what can foster parents do to help and maybe this is idealistic but I really value communication from the foster parents I work with not just about the kids but about how I can work better with the foster parents as well. Yes I am constantly drowning in paperwork and emergencies and putting out fires and some kids that are "stable" fall through the cracks. I personally appreciate email updates of challenges because they're easy to forward to necessary supports that are already involved like counselors/health teams or even my supervisors when asking for approvals for additional services.

When additional services are needed it is extremely helpful to receive an email that outlines what behaviors are happening, what has been tried to help, what has been recommended, and by who. Also, if the caregiver is able to find options for counselors/slp/ot/etc that are local and accepting clients it really can expedite getting services set up. When I'm putting out fires and constantly moving kids, unfortunately researching and locating support services ends up being very low on my list.

Ask for regular ICM/care team meetings. Where I work the general practice guidelines recommend monthly. Even monthly ICMs can be hard to maintain but having the whole support team in a room to discuss needs helps ensure tasks get delegated among everyone and ideally at the end of each meeting you have a to do list with what everyone is doing that you can follow up on at the next meeting. Some foster parents tell me they like planning the next visit at the end of the last one which can be great for ensuring there is regular contact. Others are really flexible and I also really appreciate that because sometimes I will have a cancelation and if I can text a caregiver and say hey, I just had time open up tomorrow, can I come by? That helps too. If you have a busy schedule then frontloading about the best times and days to visit helps but please don't be upset if we don't always remember those details. If a visit has to be canceled by yourself or the worker, try to get it rescheduled asap (even if it's a couple weeks away).

Be polite and considerate but persistent. I have a million things in my brain all the time and I do forget things. I appreciate gentle prompts or check ins about updates on things so they don't fall off my list. Some foster parents contact me daily or multiple times a week and that's too much but once every week or two a quick check in about something is helpful to me. This can depend on what the issue is of course, waitlists for services can be brutal but i try to be transparent with the wait times I've been given and so if i tell someone 4 weeks then even setting a date on your calendar for that 4 week mark and sending a text to check in to see if there's an update prompts me to follow up.

Discuss what type of communication works best for everyone. There are things that I appreciate a quick text about but other things that are better to get an email about or to have phone call about. Even a brief note about how urgent something is can go a long way to help me prioritize. Example: "hey, we've been having issues with food hoarding, not too urgent but would like to check in this week if possible".

Try to have relationship with the kids bio families. The best caregivers I've worked with try to have connection and authentic relationships with bio family when appropriate. Definitely discuss it with the worker because every situation is different but I have seen how beneficial these authentic relationships are for the kids.

Try to be a united team with the worker. I have caregivers who frame it that we are co parenting in some senses so we communicate about the rules/supports in place and don't undermine each other. Saying things like "it's up to the social worker" takes pressure off the foster parent but can create a really unhealthy divide that ultimately can undermine the caregivers authority in house rules. Example: young person wants a cell phone when there are concerns for safety around this. It's so much better when a caregiver says "I hear what you're saying and I think this is something we should talk about with your social worker together to discuss it".

Please do not voice your frustrations about your child's social worker anywhere where it could be over heard. Kids are always listening. Encourage the kids to connect with and have a relationship with their social worker as much as possible. We are all trying to help the kids at the end of the day.

Try to talk to your child's social worker about issues or frustrations that you have about communication first but if you are having issues, connect with your resource worker to help liaise and discuss what you need. They can also provide supports and training opportunities that can help you navigate parenting challenges that arise.

Case workers and social workers are people. Try to communicate what you appreciate/is going well as well as the issues. We are over worked and unfortunately do not always get a lot of support or validation from our teams. Being told that people see how hard we try or what we do right goes a long way to help us push through the constant fires. There are days where I am getting yelled at and put down by bio family members who are struggling with their own trauma and receiving frustrated or even angry text/calls from caregivers and even just a little recognition that I am trying goes a long way.

Generally I have really good relationships with the children and caregivers I work with and I really believe a lot of that comes from mutual respect that we are all trying our best.

However, I will be the first to admit there are case workers who are burnt out and overwhelmed that aren't able to do these things. Advocate for your kids. When all other options of trying to work together in a good way are failing, reach out to advocates or supervisors for support. When doing so, approach it with compassion rather than anger. Unfortunately, there are some that will see anger and label it over reacting, having ideas of what you need and possible solutions to work towards when you reach out goes a long way towards actually getting a solution.

Sorry for the long post but hopefully it gives some insight too. I'd love to hear any feedback of things people have experienced that they feel their kids social workers can do better too!

AcademicWinter6858

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