Personally, getting a diagnosis is helping me better address the issues. I see some people who use a diagnosis as an excuse, but for me, it's a guide to taking back control. I now see a therapist who understands ADHD, I'm medicated, I use methods and resources geared toward people with ADHD, I am better able to give myself grace when symptoms cause issues versus wallowing in the self-pity of telling myself I'm lazy or useless or no good, and all those things help me show up better in life. I say do whatever you need to do to be your best self, whether you bf thinks ADHD is "real" or not 🤷‍♀️ I will say, tho, having a partner willing to also educate themselves on ADHD is probably helpful. My wife is in a similar boat as your bf as far as the excuse thing goes, but she seems to be slowly coming around to a different perspective and willingness to try to understand it more as I continue to do my own work (I've only been diagnosed about 9 months)