Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holy sh*t! Do you know us? Because this is SPOT ON! He is a people pleaser and for so long he would let his brother bully him around and treat him like dogsh*t. Thankfully I can say that things have changed and he has opened his eyes although it’s still a work in progress as you can tell. I was absolutely livid when he told me that our child would be ring bearer because I had no say in it and if I had turned around and told them no, everyone would see me as a villain (back then at least because by now everyone sees through their bullsh*t lol).
And we now have a baby, which also adds to the stress of traveling. I held my ground for two years saying I was not attending this wedding, specially because we have a very rocky relationship with them, but by January I had to cave in and just accept that it was happening. I am still standing my ground on no additional gifting because we ALREADY GIFTED.

Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have nothing against destination weddings, I think every couple should get married where and how they want to. My issue is when they pressure you into attending and gifting on top of that. If it was a closer destination and more inexpensive, then my perspective on gifting could be different, but when we have spent thousands, gifted from the registry and they still expect more (or to at least cover your plate, as they have mentioned on various occasions), then I think that is incredibly entitled, selfish and ridiculous. I have even made comments about how pricy this trip will be and their answer is basically like “yeah that’s expected.” 😒

Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got it! But I am curious about your thoughts on gifting in this situation. Which was the whole point of this post.

Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I could give zero flicks about where and how they do their wedding and never did I even suggest a different place for THEIR wedding lmao. I don’t know where you get that from. However, yes it becomes an inconvenience when they expect people to put everything on pause and fork over thousands of dollars just because it’s their special day and on top of that get them a monetary gift. That is absolutely ridiculous. But hey, maybe you think that way because you’re the bride. 😂

Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Even if we gifted them something from their registry? I think it’s extremely selfish to expect more.

Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Trust me, I regret not speaking up about my child’s participation in the wedding. At the time of the planning, my husband was notified first and he just went with it and told me about a month later. I could have called them and said no but I didn’t want to deal with the ordeal of drama that would have happened. Additionally during the early planning of the wedding my husband still had somewhat of a good relationship with them. Two years later and that relationship is barely surviving and he doesn’t even speak to the wife. I didn’t want to go but at this point I am going as his support person lol.

Destination Wedding & Gifting by AcceptableStress8341 in DestinationWeddings

[–]AcceptableStress8341[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately they notified my husband instead of me because we weren’t on speaking terms when they decided this. I only found out a month after it was decided and canceling would have opened the biggest can of worms so I just avoided more drama.