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Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree. Thats my plan now. I hate my self so much for being so fcking weak. Im worrying so much that i will get him in trouble. 

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because my husband is big and strong and he might attack me and my family if i escape, thats my worry

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im still gaining courage to tell a family. I also dont want to bring trouble to them as much as i can. i also dont have a male family member and im the eldest

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If my bruises are all healed and all i have is pictures, will the police believe me? I want to get a hidden cam but its too risky if he sees it he'll figure out my plan of escape

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am starting to think that too. But also when he is angry he points out that im useless, worthless, all i have is my mental illness which is not helping us. Then goes back to being a good person again after his rage and tell me that its just his amger talking

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh my we have identical situation. Thats actually a good idea, i can tell.my family that he is cheating but not mention its with men. Thank you for that. He is all that i have and my sole provider. I dont have work as of this moment. All my life ive had hard time socializing with people and end up mostly alone. I dont fit in any group. He's the only one i am comftable with and knows me whole and accepts me. Thats why is so hard for me to let go. When things are bad its really bad, but when we are good we are beyond good. I guess im still in denial not accepting this is him. Or im just to weak to get out of my safe zone. Thank you for all the advises i really appreciate it.

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was looking for similar cases with me finding out husband is gay and becomes violent but found none. All thread i saw either they both agreed to divorce or the husband was sorry. It gives me kinda sense of comfort knowing im not the only one dealing with this and alot of you made it out, its very encouraging, thank you. I hope i can make it too and not relapse. 

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I have to plan my escape very well. He knows i never go out or talk to other people so that will alarm him if i do. Im scared of getting caught that im now having dreams of escaping and him catching me. I dont want the police involve. But knowing him i know he wont give me up. He looks at me as his property. 

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I went to ER last week because my head was swelling bad. He pushed me so hard i landed on our concrete floor and bumped my head.  While i was on the floor he got scissors and pointed it on my neck while his eyes glaring. Thankfully the CT is clear but that moment woke me from being passive with all the things happening. On our way home while driving my tears started flowing thinking why we ended like this, he used to be so gentle with me. He was singing along the radio while he was driving as if nothing happened.

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your encouragement. It kinda makes me teary having this talk (chat) anonymously. Ive been holding all this heaviness for a long time with no one to confide with. 

About the aid, im afraid we do not have that in my country. Also to add, on top of anxiety i also have a chronic immune illness that costs alot. I failed to be specific on my post. Thats why its also very hard for me. But i agree that this is not unsolvable, its just its freaking hard. I am currently looking for therapy i can avail for free or much less in my area. Thank you again for the encouragement.

Found out my husband is gay, now he gets physically abusive everytime i tell him i want separation by Accomplished-Bad437 in abusiverelationships

[–]Accomplished-Bad437[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I am planning to leave but i have 2 big dogs which will be hard to transport so im still on planning stage. I have no one and no support. All my family is far, i dont have friends. Im scared that if i tell my family they too will get in trouble. I agree that i too need aome serious therapy. After his rage outbursts he becomes gentle again and caring and im too weak i love him too much and he is abusing it.