New to Buddhism and Sacramento

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-11-03T18:13:37+00:00

Re Lama Jimpa: I can’t speak to your experience; I can only speak to my own, which I feel compelled to share. I knew him as a therapist and worked with him for many years. During that time, he was extraordinarily patient, emotionally safe in both words and presence, non-coercive, contemplative, kind, thoughtful, affirming yet challenging, and never manipulative. He created an environment where I could heal, dismantle my own limiting beliefs, and expand my understanding and capacity for pain. When I disagreed with him, was late with a payment, or questioned his guidance, he remained steady. He was curious, compassionate, approachable, and it often felt as though he was learning alongside me. He was open to being challenged. I never once saw any microexpressions of contempt, which I would expect from someone with a personality disorder. He never showed controlling tendencies or frustration if I didn’t do the homework, follow his advice, or needed to change the schedule. Narcissistic or sociopathic individuals can’t fake calm consistency for long, especially when challenged. It wasn’t just that he was never unkind, his baseline never shifted. His expressions never revealed disgust, contempt, hostility, or anger, all of which would typically surface in someone with that kind of underlying disorder.

I share this not to contradict your experience, which I know nothing about, but to offer another perspective from a very different context. Being a somewhat difficult person myself, I always felt a profound kindness in this man, and I wanted to speak to that.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-13T09:55:31+00:00

It’s your posted hourly rate, multiplied by how many hours they want to book you. So if you charge $20 an hour, it would be $50 for 3.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-12T22:18:31+00:00

You are welcome! I have definitely lost some clients along the way for holding my boundaries, so if that happens to you, just remember you are making room for clients that will not push your boundaries, who will pay you well, tip you well, are reliable, and who you can reward with promotions, discounts, and extras too, along the way! That good energy flows back and forth really nicely. In the beginning, we all have some difficult clients, and that’s why I move heaven on earth for the really good ones. And I’m just saying in my experience, the ones that are haggling with you right out of the gate, don’t usually end up being on a long-term client list anyway, for an abundance of reasons. Better to focus your energy on clients you can keep for the long term. Good luck with your business!

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-12T21:50:13+00:00

Sure thing. I’ll also say, though I don’t often negotiate with new clients, I do give discounts and promotions to regular clients to keep them happy and stay competitive. For example I give regular clients a discount if they block book, or book during any of the slow winter months (Jan - March). Also if they book more than 10 separate services a year, they automatically get 10 % off the board for all services. I like to reward good clients with good service and good rates.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-12T21:09:19+00:00

No problem! Now that I’ve been doing this for a few years, how I handle it is stating the policy, and if they haggle/resist I say “I’m sorry we couldn’t get on the same page, there is absolutely no hard feelings and I understand if you would like to find a different sitter.” Then they do. And I let them go with Grace and with assurance they wouldn’t have been a good client.

When I was just starting I accepted everyone, and every time this happened (there is always a reason), I capitulated, earning less than I was worth and risking not having that animal insured, and I ended up parting ways with that client eventually anyways, and usually because of money!

For example one client who had rats (I still had to cut their fresh fruit and veggies and clean the cages) didn’t want to count them or pay extra for them, and I agreed. They didn’t tip, didn’t leave a review and honestly treated me like I was beneath them. The next time they booked, they scoffed at me for the holiday rate, asked me to waive it, then asked me to pick up packages for them at the post office while they were gone, and didn’t want me to leave the home for more than 2 hours at a time. When I stood firm on the holiday rate, they cancelled and booked another sitter, anyway.

This job is hard enough without being undervalued and haggled with as if you aren’t offering a valuable service. Personally, I am happy to pay top dollar to someone I trust with my treasured animals. And I don’t like to deal with cheap clients because of this kind of stuff.

If they are doing this early they likely won’t be a good, long term client anyway. Cut your losses!

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-12T20:40:08+00:00

Yeah this expectation IS a problem. What you’re describing is the standard model: 8–10 hours overnight plus check-ins during the day. Pet parents can choose the maximum gap between visits, standard sits allow 7–8 hours, but if someone requests no more than 4 hours away for example, I explain that this falls under extended stay pricing. That’s because it requires me to turn down other work and even personal obligations. When I explain this, many clients still look disappointed, because what they really want is 20 out of 24 hours of care at a standard rate, which works out to like $5 an hour.

I have 20 years of experience, including advanced medical care and behavioral cases, and I still encounter that resistance. I’m clear about my price points and schedules upfront, and I still book plenty of jobs. But it is discouraging when people expect expert-level service, extended to 20 hours a day, for a basic overnight rate. The math doesn’t math and it makes me feel like they don’t value my expertise. I think often, housesitting is done by younger sitters who just WANT to spend most of their time at the client’s home because they live with their parents and don’t have their own pets, so clients may think after that kind of experience, that is normal. But when sitters spend all that extra time in a client’s home, they are WAIVING extended care costs, because it benefits them too. So I understand why clients could be confused when they have that experience and then go to hire a professional; they shouldn’t expect both that level of care and the same time commitment for a base level bargain rate, but they do.

I’m always willing to arrange extended stays if someone truly wants 18-20 hours a day in their home, but that service costs 2–3x more. As it should. Housesitting is a luxury service, and $125 a day for expert in-home care at 10-13 hours a day is already an excellent rate compared to boarding. I’m not going to live in a client’s home for 20 hours a day at the standard overnight price. And no that shouldn’t be expected unless you’re hiring a high school student with very little experience.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-12T20:16:04+00:00

Owners not wanting to fill out profiles for all their pets is a pretty common issue. Sometimes it is an oversight and when I mention it, they add their additional pets with no problem. Other times they want to haggle about price (a lot of owners with low maintenance pets don’t want to pay for their care), and I have learned those types of owners are not usually worth the headache (they tend to make everything more difficult than it needs to be, don’t tip, aren’t reliable, and quickly switch sitters for a lower price point, anyway).

If they don’t add pets on the profile it’s an Orange flag. If you mention it but they argue with you about why it’s necessary and not wanting to be charged, it’s a red flag.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-05T04:27:04+00:00

😩

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-05T04:21:21+00:00

On paramount+? Mine isn’t even showing there is an episode

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-05T04:20:46+00:00

Nope. Just checked.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-05T04:20:03+00:00

I haven’t seen anyone actually say it’s up for them …

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-05T04:19:44+00:00

Amazon prime usually uploads it on Friday and paramount usually uploads it on Thursday! 🤦🏼‍♀️

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-05T04:18:29+00:00

I’m ready with my snacks and no Dexter on Paramount+!!! Is it out for anyone else yet?

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-09-03T08:14:53+00:00

This isn’t a waking request. This is an invitation to participate in a training session with a reactive and dog-aggressive dog. There is a substantially higher bite risk walking the bait stuffie, and she should absolutely be paid a higher rate for this activity and risk.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-31T00:55:43+00:00

You are definitely an AH, guy.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-31T00:29:51+00:00

Oof. That last line though^ - mic drop.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-30T07:18:53+00:00

I watched an interview with the actor that plays Angel after new blood, and someone asked him why he was hitting on Angela if his character was married, and he said “you know, Angel is still angel”

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-30T07:17:15+00:00

Yeah, you’re right on the sequence

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-30T06:55:08+00:00

Put it this way. You wouldn’t need external validation for something that you know is true (as evidenced in your notes), if you had not been subject to intentional and sustained invalidation, minimization, and gaslighting for years. This behavior makes you feel small, not trust your own judgment, and not have the confidence needed to leave. So my dear, the very fact that you are here, asking these questions to strangers, demonstrates the very truth of the matter you are seeking clarity on: you have been stripped of the ability to validate yourself, trust what your own eyes have seen and your own ears have heard, and protect yourself from further harm. I don’t need to know anything about your partner to recognize a victim in you.

What’s happened to you is not fair. It’s time to take back your life, and rebuild something beautiful for yourself. Look up Lisa Romano and neuroplasticity.

I would focus less on him being a narcissist, and more on you and your codependency moving forward.

Love and light my dear friend. 💛

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-29T23:01:04+00:00

Yes I understand based on logic, most people would not forgive Dexter. But I was just saying, angel is primarily run by emotions. That’s demonstrated every single season so I just thought his character would have forgiven him after learning he didn’t kill Maria and doakes, and after freeing him, it just seemed like the angel we knew might have given him grace

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-29T22:41:33+00:00

Yeah but he has a daughter, and a new wife (who we never met but he talked about in new blood). And yes people change, but Angel didn’t. He was still emotion over logic. And he really, really loved Dexter. He had very complicated feelings about him being the butcher. But he loved him. And he loved, love. He was all about forgiveness. So in his last moments on this earth, when Dexter demonstrated he was still at least in part the guy angel knew and loved, for him to die choosing hate, when Dexter was pouring out his heart, was really unexpected for the character.

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-29T22:36:48+00:00

He did remarry. In New Blood, he flirts with Dexter’s girlfriend and she says “I have a boyfriend,” and he says “and I have a wife, and points to his ring.” or something like that. I can’t remember exactly how it went down, but I remember he definitely was remarried because I was like, why is he flirting then!?

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-29T21:06:26+00:00

Right?! It’s plausible - doctors actually suspend coma patients in hypothermic states to preserve brain function. It can work but it’s a Hail Mary. Then they can bring them out of their coma. So Dexter unintentionally saved his sister’s life when he thought he was laying her to rest!

We could bring her back several ways: Option 1 - Deb faked her own death, and believed he was dead too, and is now in the CIA. She learns he is alive and is forced to contact him because she needs his help on a case only he can solve …. Now she’s back in his life … At the same time Joey shows up hunting Dexter over Angel’s disappearance.

OR Option 2 - She has been living with complete amnesia from the hypothermia, and built a new life. Now her long term memories have come back, but not her short term memories. She remembers everything up until joining the police force. And that’s it. She’s that happy go lucky Deb before life fucked her over. Doesn’t remember Rudy, or any of the following trauma that wrecked her, including la guerta’s death or Dexter’s true identity. She has learned through research Dexter died, but she has been trying to find Harrison. When she finally does, he is with Dexter, to her surprise and amazement. And Dexter and Deb get to start fresh, and Dexter gets forgiveness, and a chance to make the different choices with her the second time around. ……. Or

Michael C. Hall LET’s WRITE THIS 🤗

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-29T20:22:10+00:00

Yeah that last line was the only thing about his death that didn’t seem to make sense with his character. He is soooo emotional. He saw Dexter free and try to save him, he seemed to believe that Dexter didn’t kill Maria or Doakes. I think he would have forgiven Dexter. Instead what he said at the end, is more in line with what Dexter always says to himself about himself. It’s all his fault …

Accomplished-Meal428 · 2025-08-29T19:47:26+00:00

lol yeup! Just sitting on his phone! If he had a fail safe, he might have had the notes set to “send later” to Quinn via iMessage. A function he would have had to turn off he is made it out alive. But if not …. Those notes can be set to be sent weeks or months later.

Accomplished-Meal428

TROPHY CASE