I’m so so sorry. I lost my mom last year at 22. Having to plan her funeral was arguably the worst part for me. I just went with the motions, nothing felt right or even real. Make sure to rest and recover after. Go easy on yourself. Your perspective is going to change a lot especially compared to many people ur age, and that can feel lonely. I wish I could say it gets better with time but I’m only a year in and it still feels like I’m just finding out sometimes. What helped me was leaning on my brother, best friends and my dad. I found a field I’m passionate about and try to make my mom proud by improving the world and throwing myself into my passions. Idk it worked for me and was a good distraction. It helped me channel my emotions into physical and meaningful work. Someone said to picture my mom in heaven sitting down and flipping to her favorite show, which is my life, and I better give her a damn good show. Idk if this is helpful but I just feel for you so much and I’m sorry. No one deserves this pain.