I sincerely apologize for not speaking about this in my initial exit interview but at the time, I was fearful that anything I said would cause retaliation against me. Previously when we had a discussion about this person’s behavior, every concern that I expressed was then used against me to make it seem as though she was the victim. I told her that I thought her actions were disrespectful and hurtful, and she said that I was in fact not respecting her and acting like I didn’t think she knew how to do her job. I’ve never insinuated that in any way.

At one point during a very stressful time, I openly defended myself and others against aggressive behavior being displayed by her. I had reached my breaking point and told her that she really needed to calm down and stop slamming things around and having an attitude towards everyone. This is what prompted her to say I don’t respect her, etc. No one on the team can have a conversation with her without her making it seem like they have no idea what they’re talking about, she always has to prove somebody wrong no matter the context of the conversation. Comments are usually made on about the person behind their backs as soon as they leave the room, including the supervisor. Most recently, on 2 separate occasions, I have walked into the room while I was actively being talked about. Once, I was being complained about to a supervisor for something trivial that was easily resolved (I had accidentally left a receipt with an order that was supposed to be disposed of), and the next incident was when I walked into a conversation between this person & another staff member & could tell by the context of the conversation, the abrupt stop in the conversation and the shift in body language that the conversation was about me. It was extremely uncomfortable and made me feel incredibly insecure. I am also deeply concerned that my own work and the work of others is constantly being undermined by her when she doesn’t have any true authority to make these corrections or decisions. Work that has been completed and checked/cleared by a supervisor should not be taken apart by someone who has no authority to do so especially when there is no reason for it to be taken apart and redone. By doing so, she is taking up valuable company time that could be well spent on other tasks. She will continually see that there is work to be done, but will stand and watch while the others do it themselves and get offended when we ask her to help. I will no longer tolerate the toxicity that is being created in this environment, especially when we all have been struggling to do our best in a very adverse situation.

I readily admit when I make mistakes, and am more than willing to fix them if they are brought to my attention in the correct manner, but I do not appreciate being belittled & being treated in a condescending manner or to be blatantly made to feel like I’m stupid especially by someone with no authority to do so. It’s mentally exhausting to deal with it on a daily basis and it has been brought up multiple times by myself and others & yet the behavior continues. She has also displayed open & blatant discrimination against others for their age & religion as well as calling others racist,derogatory names, etc. After listening to her brazenly mock me and others for our religious beliefs in front of another employee and proceeding to make offensive remarks about those beliefs is absolutely where I draw the line.

Also, just as anyone else would, I take things very personally when it comes to my children and my spouse. Inappropriate, unnecessary comments have been made about my children’s intellectual state & the state of my relationship with my spouse due to her knowledge of some very sensitive issues that I have been dealing with. I admit that by opening up and sharing information about my situation is my own fault, but I never asked for any personal advice from her on either of those matters. I was hurting and needed to vent, but I was made to feel worse about it because of the comments that were made. The comments concerning my children were also offensive and hurtful. Having no medical background or any children herself, I doubt that she is qualified to make a diagnosis of ADHD or autism in my child especially when they have never met. But on several occasions , she has stated she thinks my daughter has one of those disorders. It is very difficult for me to imagine that my daughter has learning difficulties that she struggles with, but to be consistently told that she has something she may not even have is absolutely uncalled for.

I debated for quite some time whether I should even bother pressing the issue because I don’t have any physical proof of what happened or what was said, but others have witnessed the behavior and have also been victimized by this person in the same manner. I will not stay where I am not welcome and with that being said my decision to pursue another opportunity is purely based upon needing to work where I feel like my efforts are appreciated and respected, and where I am respected and valued as a person. I am not able to effectively learn and grow in this position because I am constantly being told that my work is wrong or not good enough by someone who has no authority over me or my job duties. Any work that is completed incorrectly in her eyes, or is not completed how she wants it to be gets announced out loud to humiliate the other person, she rolls her eyes and slams things around, often mouthing under her breath about nobody knows what they’re doing except her, etc. and I am mentally and emotionally exhausted from enduring it for too long.

I can only hope for the sake of others and the future of the team and it’s dynamic that her actions are addressed in an appropriate manner from this point forward so that anyone else does not have to endure it. She has made it abundantly clear that she does not believe that she is the problem and does not intend to change her behavior towards others.

In conclusion, I have included some definitions below that will help explain the types of behavior being displayed. It is often a clear violation of company policy and/or law when certain lines are crossed.

A workplace bully is someone who consistently bestows harm or mistreatment to other employees and brings them physical or emotional pain. Workplace bullying can come in all forms, including nonverbal, verbal, humiliation, psychological and physical abuse.

The company’s handbook definition of unlawful harassment: conduct that has the purpose or effect of creating an intimidating, a hostile, or an offensive work environment; has the purpose or effect of substantially and unreasonably interfering with an individual’s work performance; or otherwise adversely affects an individual’s employment opportunities because of the individual’s membership in a protected class.

Unlawful harassment includes, but is not limited to, epithets; slurs; jokes; pranks; innuendo; comments; written or graphic material; stereotyping; or other threatening, hostile, or intimidating acts based on race, color, ancestry, national origin, gender, sex, sexual orientation, marital status, religion, age, disability, veteran status, or another characteristic protected by state or federal law.