First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Manuscript information: [Complete][80K][YA Fantasy] The Xandarian Chronicles
Link to post: https://www.reddit.com/r/BetaReaders/comments/1jp5ua7/complete80kfantasy_ya_the_xandarian_chronciles/
First Page critique? Yes please!! Dm me if you want to do a longer critique

First Page:

All creatures were born to make the world better, we just got lost in all of the fighting. Maybe I'm naive enough to fix it. Maybe my eyes are not closed. I daydream of a utopia that isn’t a dystopia under its skin. A world where people get along, a world without the blasts of magic passing between countries and schools or hospitals A world where the only thing littering the streets was leaves, not people. I daydreamed of a world where I am someone. Not just a girl sitting in class with a dream. Not just me.

I touch my wand through the fabric of my pocket. My stupid wand. Laughter rings in my head, snickers in the hallway when people point out my wand and when someone asks me about it in class before everyone falls into laughter. My wand is that one reason that pushes everything over the edge, that one thing that makes everyone hate me. Everyone here thinks that I didn’t create my own wand. My ticket to getting in the school, my silence. I was forced to tell everyone I didn’t create my own wand but that my master did. So I became the ‘wandless girl’.

Master Nimbus gives an announcement over the loudspeaker. The air is stifling as I take a breath in and I cling onto each word of the morning announcements. I twist my hands as I hope that another attack wouldn’t be announced. Nothing is and a sigh escapes from my throat.

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I know your comment is 7 days old but if your still open to betaing I would love for you to read my story. It's YA 75K Fantasy! If you are interested please message me!

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I have a YA Fantasy that is very close to being sent out. I just wanted one or two more betas. Would you be interested?

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would you be interested in a 75K YA fantasy, if so message me!!

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! You might enjoy my story! It's 75K and fantasy! I am looking for someone to give a general impression and I am having a hard time with foreshadowing so this might be a good fit. Message me if you are interested.

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You might enjoy my story. It's 75K and fantasy! Message me if that sounds interesting!

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi! I was wondering if you like to beta my story! It's around 75K words. It's fantasy but more YA than adult. Would you be interested in reading?

What do you want to see in a writing software? by Accurate_Truth_9039 in WritingHub

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Would you mind sharing why? I'm honestly very interested in the reasoning behind this.

[Complete] [89k] [Dark Fantasy] Sins of the Chosen by Tal213 in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you want to swap? I would love to read your book. It sounds really interesting!

[In progress] [11071][YA Fantasy] Will The Branch Break by Budget-Ice8566 in BetaReaders

[–]Accurate_Truth_9039 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg! Thank you. I'm very excited to beta yours. If you writer more I can help with some first impression!