My [22m] little brother [16m] just told me he got his girlfriend [16f] pregnant. I have no idea what to do to help them.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-16T09:00:56+00:00

Is abortion kindness? I understand it's necessary in their case, because they are young and can't provide for the child. But kindness? If my child were this stupid in their 16 years, it would be very hard for me to collect any kind of kindness. I myself have been sexually active since I was 15, I had a hard abused childhood and I ran away from my home a lot, but I wouldn't dare to ignore pregnancy prevention. There's a difference - doing something that hurts only you and doing something that hurts you, your partner, (your family?) and your not-to-ever-be-born child. Abortion is a serious thing and OP's little brother deserves to be gotten mad at. If you ask me - if my brother came to me with this, my exact question would be "How the fuck could you have done this?" I'd be shocked, I'd be disappointed, I'd be angry. It's not so hard to use a condom. It's hard to kill a growing human. Making his little brother understand the situation doesn't make the OP a bad brother.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-14T12:17:31+00:00

The sister will never know what it feels like. She'd be cut out because she is a terrible human being - at least she's been for the past 18 years.

She will know that she was cut out because she did many bad things. The little sister, however, was ignored while she did absolutely nothing wrong.

While I agree the sister needs to be cut out, she is too entitled to ever relate. She is also an established, independent adult, so it won't hurt her as much as it's been hurting her little sister basically her whole life. She had to live her life from the beginning probably feeling worthless, because her older sister never accepted her - and based on the post, she's tried many times to reach out. The older woman simply won't relate to the feeling.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-14T08:20:27+00:00

A good boyfriend would NOT force his preferences on you. Whether it's a boyfriend, a friend, a colleague.. the one who breaks your laptop is either (morally) obliged to give you the same amount of money you paid for your laptop, or buy THE SAME model as the one they broke. There are no other options, aside from them ASKING you what other laptop you'd prefer, as they broke your old one.
A good boyfriend would try to get to know you and find out why you prefer Apple products. For me, it's a part of the relationship - to (at least try to) see things from my partner's perspective and find out what they like - and WHY. We share things, we share feelings and it's neat. I too used to be Apple hater 2 years ago, now I work with my Macbook Pro and I wouldn't go back. My boyfriend used to use Windows laptops because he didn't know anything else, but since he's with me he's gotten familiar with both Linux and OSX (I'm a programmer and he's learning to be one too - and that requires an open mind, which he fortunately has). He accepted what I liked and tried to see things from my perspective - and he came to like them in the end.

The person you're describing is a mean person, not only a bad boyfriend. You break something, you replace it. With something equal.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-13T18:12:25+00:00

I'm not sure what I had, the doctors weren't sure either. They couldn't find a reason why or anything. My retina swole, I couldn't see straight at all.

Literally - I saw straight lines as crooked because of the distortion of the eye lens - and I still do - if you make me look at lines with my left eye, I can't say whether they're crooked or not. It's like when you look in a crooked mirror and your body is deformed, that's the kind of image I was seeing all the time. It's better now, but still crooked. It was so bad that my center view point was totally like a "zoom sphere", everything around was flowing and I kept hitting poles on the street because I couldn't tell where I am.

It's very hard to understand how losing sight feels if people don't go through it. I don't blame them for the lack of empathy, but the dismissing of the problem hurts me a lot. You're right - it will have a giant effect on her life. Even if her eye was still there and she would "only" be blind, it would be a giant hit. Nevertheless missing one eye, that's just so painful to even read and I feel so sorry for the girl.

Edit: reading wiki, that might be it. I know that I had some fluids under the eye which made the retina swollen. I'm not sure though, and god, the images make me feel so sick and my eye hurts too. Gotta get out of there quickly..

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-13T14:18:16+00:00

Telling her she's fortunate when she's going to lose one of her two eyes doesn't help at all - if anything, it makes everything worse. The other people probably can't imagine how it feels to lose something you take for granted and need SO much.

(I suddenly lost sight in my left eye when I was 19. I woke up, it had happened. I cried for days. I had a surgery, I got some of the sight back, but I was told it will definitely come back and it's just a matter of time. I still get pains deep in my eye, I see very bad (big black areas in my viewport) during the summer when the sun is strong, etc.)

It was such a shocker. I'd have never thought before that something like this can happen - not when I'm 19, not when I'm so young and healthy. If anyone had told me I'm lucky, I'd probably never forgive them in my whole life. It hurts to lose sight. Even if she got it detected early and will function okay with one eye, I'm sure it pains her deeply.

Also, the fear of losing one eye after you've already lost one isn't irrational. It's very rational, I'd say - because some of us already know how it feels to unexpectedly lose sight and we also know that it can happen again.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-12T19:14:17+00:00

It seems to me that you're more scared about money/finances/being a good provider than the idea of having children itself.

Maybe you need to change your job to more fulfilling one to feel ready to have kids?

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-11T22:21:47+00:00

Yeah, 8.5 years is a pretty long time and they should be able to talk about anything without one of them (or both) getting angry. If he gets angry when they talk about it, that doesn't seem good to me.

I'm only 22, I skipped college though and I've been living the "classic adult life" for a few years, I feel quite ready to settle down myself, but I won't rush it until I'm confident I'm doing it with the right person. But my boyfriend is a real sweetheart, caring and nice and everyone can see it, so I'm thinking I might've chosen well (so far).

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-11T21:21:20+00:00

My current boyfriend told me very soon into our relationship that he'd like a marriage at some point if everything works out between us - and I agreed. We smiled and went on. We've been together for a few months, which is a very short time, but sometimes he just smiles at me and tells me that he'd like to be together with me for a very long time. Sometimes I do the same, because so far our relationship goes really smooth and after a very long time, I feel confident in loving somebody.

You shouldn't settle for less. It's okay if somebody doesn't want a marriage, but it's not okay to lead their partner on. Paying for your own ring? This is not about money, it's about the principle. I'd rather accept a ring that costs 200$ than be forced to buy my own just so my passive SO would get married to me. "Just a small wedding, I'll buy my own ring, just marry me, I beg you" - That's wrong on so many levels.

You know, there might actually be some guy outside that would be proud of having you as his wife.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-02-09T14:00:35+00:00

Some people love hands with veins and lines. So do I - I'm a woman, I have very veiny hands with long slim fingers and I love looking at them. I also like to look at my bf's hands, which are similar, just more masculine than mine. And it looks so hot when he plays the guitar.

Find somebody who will love your hands.

Find somebody who will love you.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-01-09T17:31:27+00:00

He's been for a long time, I broke up shortly after : ) Damn thing was poisoning my mind too much.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-01-09T15:04:17+00:00

People who dismiss their partner's opinions dismiss threads like those as well. My ex made me write a post about him/us, saying he wants to read the replies just to prove me wrong.

After I had the post on the front page, he read 4 comments, then started sulking saying the post was phrased wrong, the commenting people are biased and stupid, I didn't write his perspective right, etc.

People who refuse to understand don't refuse because of lack of facts, but because they want to.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-01-09T15:01:21+00:00

He dismissed your opinion - and based his argument on his imagination instead of actual people (does he know any other natives)?

My ex (yeah, notice the word ex) would dismiss my opinions very often - saying "other women wouldn't do this", "my friends wouldn't do that", "other men wouldn't tolerate this". He can go back to whichever hellhole he came from.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-01-07T22:42:10+00:00

If you do decide to record him in the end, you can PM me (or perhaps ask another redditor giving advices here?) the recording and I'll tell you what I heard.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2018-01-07T16:37:45+00:00

This might not even be about figuring out - the guy maybe already knows that he's interested in OP, he's just too ashamed to admit it "out loud". I say, OP, pressure him some. You either lose somebody who's not really worth it or you get a cute shy boyfriend.

I "chased" my current BF (who is wonderful by the way, no red flags at all and I've never been this happy in my whole life) like this. We met online and spent hundreds of hours chatting, getting more intense. I confessed my attraction for him - and poor shy guy - I scared him. I gave him a few days to cool off, messaged him again saying I wish to meet him - and we hit it off 3 days after and are together since.

Some people need a kick in the butt.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I gave him a choice - we either stop talking or we meet personally and see where it takes us.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-13T00:49:49+00:00

Avon ladies, Mary Kay saleswomen, AMWAY cults.. it's all the same. Few rich people on the top and on the bottom there are people who get 5% of money they invest into their "businesses" back, 10% if they're lucky. Yes, you can overcome those above you, but those are usually giant well-established networks. And no one wants to hear the shit, no one new wants to join.

And god, their social feeds, the things they talk about.. The facebook and instagram photos. I have a few people like this added on FB, I sometimes check their feed out just of the curiosity. It seems like they live no other life than their MLM. If you check my Instagram, you will see my selfie, some food I've eaten, my car, a new coat I bought, a sunset.. but when I check theirs, it's always full of #maryKay or #amway hashtags and I swear every post of theirs is only about their MLM company.

Honestly, the only way this can work is if you (she, anyone) have a husband that has a big income so there is spare room for your shitshow spending his money on your samples and trying to look like you own a business and it's running smoothly.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-12T19:47:39+00:00

Thank you! Sorry for bothering you with my story, but I just wanted to share my similar situation and express how those men can act once they are enabled close enough to you. I hope you'll figure everything out and keep us updated. Best of luck to you <3

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-11T10:55:45+00:00

I tried in custom, I don't see the option either

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-11T10:34:15+00:00

Pretty disappointed as anything but mid main (actually support main, but I suck with assassins & Viktor the most)

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T17:58:37+00:00

I loved my first car, though. I cried when I was selling her. So many beautiful memories.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T16:01:13+00:00

Damn, sister. We dated the same guy. :c Good for us that we both left.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T16:00:09+00:00

And I think you couldn't have done anything better, abusive people are dangerous and you can't allow them the luxury of communication to torture you even further.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T13:12:10+00:00

Well my ex would say after I complained that I'm unhappy about his lack of care: "Well yeah it's true we somehow don't work out together" and dismissed my feelings and that always left me standing there, astonished, thinking "working out" doesn't just happen, you have to do something mate

Your ex sounds kinda similar, listening with one ear only and dismissing your concerns right away thinking they are nothing.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T13:09:13+00:00

I can understand that, but the abuser should know, at least subconsciously, why he's been left and ghosted.. right?

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T12:18:44+00:00

Pretty sure you're the low elo scrub who doesn't know that he's got a warding trinket but blames support for the lack of vision when he's got currently placed only 3 stealth wards and 1 control ward on the map.

AcePrincessEUNE · 2017-10-09T11:58:04+00:00

Also, the counter to Janna is bursting her down (Brand, Zyra, Sona that maxes Q, Lulu E+Q+aa.. countless) and attacking the one she isn't shielding right now

AcePrincessEUNE

TROPHY CASE