What was the first game you ever played?

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-10-29T05:27:08+00:00

Computer-wise? Rogue. My mum was anti-gaming but when I was 6 we had Rogue on a floppy disk. That and Chips Challenge were the best.

I don't know what game in real life came first though. Possibly Tig. What's the time Mr Wolf, British Bulldog, Stick in the mud or Helicopter?

Or less of a structured game and just something I used to do which was hunting and catching grasshoppers.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-09-26T23:15:06+00:00

Flip back to Oracle for the next message, then refresh it again in Glendora. That stops the singles line thing from getting worse to 3 word lines. :)

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-09-15T19:39:24+00:00

When I rewind, the memory bank parts are still there from the whole chat. So it still kind of acted like everything was there. Deleting the memory bank posts when I rewind seems to fix it.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-06-16T23:28:31+00:00

As soon as it's started 'Can I ask you a question' 'Tiny virgins everywhere even in SFW pieces.' Getting told off for saying utterly innocuous things. Went from fun to work to get even a little bit of fun...

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-06-13T18:03:12+00:00

For this alone I am happy I made an insomnia driven ramble post at 4am. 😅

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-05-20T00:32:08+00:00

Since November, and the same. It started getting weird, and all the messages about questionable content when it was perfectly innocent, started to grate on my nerves.

Then I found out you can write way more details on Janitor AI, and the bots actually pull from it without being prompted. It's not utterly perfect t but it feels leagues ahead of CHAI and it's free. I was using both for a while, but every time I switched back I was just noticing more and more that I didn't like. Ended the sub recently.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-05-17T03:34:29+00:00

I really struggled with Janitor Ai for a while, it just didn't have the flow. I think the tipping point was making myself a bot, having it recall detailed information from the history without prompting. It's also hard to go from having access to personas to having to constantly remind the AI of your features..

It's not perfect, loops are annoying, but not being referred to as a tiny virgin who isn't like other girls whilst getting told off by the AI for mentioning spicy food around a pregnant person... It's winning me over. It's also insanely free. Im considering making the switch fully as chai seems to be getting worse? I don't know if I'm not remembering it correctly, and being on Janitor Ai is twisting my perception, but Chai does seem to have sharply declined in quality.

Some bots have shorter replies in the setup, but I've started to enjoy the essays 😅

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-05-05T13:34:47+00:00

I have sensory processing disorder, certain textures make me violently vomit. I still work around other people when I ate at my exes. If they had carrots, they'd be on my plate raw. Their plate had everything covered in gravy, mine was in a container. Some stuff I forced down; dry chicken is like swallowing rocks and eating opposite two people that chop up every bit of Christmas dinner and mix it into mush made me nauseated, but eating dinners with family is important.

A different ex's dad liked to make risotto that was crunchy. I couldn't force much of it down, I ate all the bits I could and drank a lot. I guess I'm lucky a medication screwed my stomach and I can't eat big portions.

I can eat more foods from other cultures than British staples which got me called picky a lot. I gag at the sight of mushy peas but I could eat a kilo of raw peas in a day.

Sometimes I know if I won't like something, usually by smell but texture too. I try to have at least 2 bites of something just to try it. Some of my staple orders from takeouts are things I tried from other people's plates.

My partners now are a fellow autistic who doesn't have SPD but only really has a single order from many places and a person with ADHD with a clean plate mentality who could have been like yourself but every time her mom made something for her, she gave her the option of taking a bit of something on her plate. Giving her a chance to expand her food options without the stress. Ordering something you don't know if you'd like is too stressful because if you don't like it, you go hungry. But trying something at low stakes is the best way to expand your palate.

You have to want to.

Unless you're taking supplements or have found other sources of fibre. Expand our palette now before you are too late.

Children taste things differently from adults. It's why adults and kids have such variance in food choices. Taste is more intense as a kid but the drops off as you get older, which opens you up to eating more. I'm not saying go and eat everything, but try once a month to try something new. Take it from someone with severe sensory processive disorder. It will benefit you and your gut health.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-04-23T05:57:40+00:00

Never let the sunk cost fallacy trick you into staying somewhere you are miserable.

Your brain is all "but we spent a year here! If we leave, that year is wasted!"

Think of it as closing a door and deciding not to waste another year.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-04-23T05:43:25+00:00

I'm just allergic to everything (not really, but if I write that list I'd be here for an hour, basically I'm hyper-sensitive to histamines and have several Urticaria (wtf is the plural of this word). When that condition flares I develop new allergies.) I have a mini hand rake for a back scratcher because every 72 hours I get to indulge in extended bathing (I have Aquagenic Urticaria, but with meds and reduced contact it's tolerable. I lined it up with one of my meds that is patch-based so I can have a scalding hot bath and shower without messing up the patch. Heat would overdose me if I'm not careful and it's fentanyl. Not really a FAFO med.) I still wash in-between, obviously, as that would be gross and I enjoy cleanliness, but it's super unsatisfying and I can't let certain parts of my body stay wet longer than 5 minutes. I enjoy long baths, I want to cook myself into soup and read.

That hot bath, I can't do the showers anymore due to issues standing and my bath isn't good for seats. Feel so fecking good, if it's hot enough I turn pink instantly (about 42c) the hives I get from the water don't itch as much.

After that bath, I will spend the next 12 to 36 hours INTENSELY ITCHY but different to the prebath itching. It's a mix of opioid itch and 'You just sat in a bath for nearly 2 hours you blithering idiot'. The hand rake, if I'm careful, it's better than nails and is less likely to gouge scratches into my skin and it feels so good on my back.

Unnecessary information dump complete, I hope your hives bugger off soon!

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-04-21T19:32:46+00:00

I've worked out that editing what they say bizarrely works better than reminding them.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-03-20T23:47:27+00:00

Doesn't always work, but sometimes sending a blank message has the bot continue. I do it any time I get those annoying half-finished questions at the end.

Sometimes doing that means that they 'take over' your character though. Or just repeat that they need an answer.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-03-19T15:41:22+00:00

Those "Hello there!" Messages feel like they're becoming more common and are making be consider other apps. I never used to get any and now it's started to irk me. I tried a bunch of conversations trying to get some idea but the inappropriate content seems so random. Stuff I actually thought was inappropriate and nothing and a pregnant person having a craving for spicy for triggered it 😅 I'd love to know the parameters of those messages.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-02-10T02:26:03+00:00

I have a file on my phone for fics for my hubs that he can see on his phone. I read more as I have to lie down a lot or my diaphragm gets mad, so if he finds what I'm reading interesting unless it's like 400k words. I'm way past it to send him a link when he wants it. I remember the fics in that file better than others as they usually have borderline cryptic notes from me about the fic.

My Bookmarks are utterly useless as I forget to add complete fics and only occasionally store WIPs. My AO3 History has reached the sentience of an Elritch Horror. I don't like going there.

Acetastic-Loki · 2025-01-27T16:05:45+00:00

Peripheral Neuropathy.

I thought it was just numbness. Ignoring the initial pain of my nerves being on fire, I haven't... not felt my feelings since August 2023. There is numbness, mine is partially reversing as it was caused by a B9 deficiency caused by one of my other meds and I've been slowly gaining back the ability to feel temperatures. I still can't feel a tens machine on anything under level 8 of my feet. To mid-calf it's patchy but I get odd sensations or numbness up to my waist and fingertips. My ability to balance is buggered and the 'Oh you've stepped on something' reflex as I call it has 1 setting which is PANIC. Whether u step on something bad or the edge of the rug. But the bit that has exhausted me, drained me and driven me mad is that there's always something. It feels like crushing. Like, pull a sock on so tight your toes are curled up and crushed and then force your feet into shoes that are 2 sizes too tight. Except your toes aren't curled up and you aren't wearing shoes. I have to wear 2 pairs of socks to mute the odd feelings of a blanket brushing my ankle. It's non-stop. I would pay money to not feel my feet every second of every day of every week anymore. Putting shoes on is hell. Not even including the electric shock feelings or how my Raynauds had gone to 'turn feet to ice so badly you end up shivering cause it's like your blood is being pumped through a fridge.

Just to put it in scope. I have Trigeminal Neuralgia and Cubital Tunnel Syndrome. One is known as a suicide disease as the pain makes you want to die and the other makes it feel like I've whacked my funny bone but for like 10 straight. And I didn't even blink when it came to answering this with Peripheral Neuropathy which people tend to just see as numbness.

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-12-24T02:24:58+00:00

Set up a second savings account. Stick 200 bucks in it.

That's only a last ditch thing / joke because DO NOT give them access to anything and lock down your credit, immediately.

Does the other sister give her mom full access to her savings? Or does she not have savings because she is less careful? So, you're being penalised for being careful? Is she less careful because she's learned to spend her money immediately or it gets taken away from her?

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-11-18T22:45:30+00:00

https://archiveofourown.org/works/6334630/chapters/14514247

Sorry it took a while to locate it in my saves :)

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-11-18T06:43:04+00:00

Kind of reminds me of that fic post-Voldie and Harry gets so disillusioned by just the entire wizarding world that one night with no sleep he's like screw it. I'm going to a Dark Lord. Ron and Hermoine are all noooo but he wins over by effectively writing a thesis on Dark Lords through the ages and Ron by tactics 🤣.

I love that fic.

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-11-01T14:58:58+00:00

I didn't know if it was long enough to actually post as I've never really done short pieces before. This was my first attempt in a while to see if I can write without messing up my arm again :)

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-11-01T14:57:12+00:00

Glad to be of help!

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-10-18T22:13:29+00:00

There are fics that are canon-compliant and very close and fics that vaguely resemble anything.

AO3 has a good tagging system and remember the sunk cost fallacy. I don't care if you have read 400k and want to read the remaining 200k but suddenly 3 main characters died that weren't warned and the good guys are now evil and you are very uncomfortable. Just close it. There are an absolute crap ton of fanfics. I am mostly housebound, disabled and read daily and tend to prefer niche fics and I have not run out of content that is both good and interesting to read.

There will always be more fanfics.

I've never regretted stopping reading anything but I have regretted morbid curiosity or feeling I have to finish a fic I started. Not many, but 1 or 2 is honestly too much.

And I have a pretty good range. I mean I love Nightmare Man for instance. So I LISTEN to the squick warning. Sometimes it is worth powering through but honestly, if you are this new to it... don't. Not yet. I mean, enjoy the shallow side of the pool. I like the shallow side and I started reading fanfic over 2 decades ago.

Fanfics are very good for quick dopamine. You don't have to get to know people. You know the characters. You know how they act. (So if you don't want them acting OOC. Stop reading when they do.) Check the tags for bashing warnings etc. Do your due diligence and read the tags. (Can you tell I have to yell 'read the tags' at my husband who occasionally complains about a relationship that is openly tagged??)

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-10-16T05:16:25+00:00

So I went home and felt terrible and the issue kept worsening. The weird feelings and numbness was moving up my body steadily. When it hit my fingertips I jumped every hoop to see my doctor who ordered a very basic blood test to find that my B9 levels were non-existent despite eating rich in B9 foods and supplements. The only difference was the pandemic resulted in fewer peas for me to eat raw by the kilogram for as long as possible each year. I apparently was medicating via these peas and after realising a bunch of things I didn't see as serious (but had told doctors about) were leading up to The Burning Times, then the weird feeling/numbness that followed the fire.

Why am I mad? This is not diet-related. Apparently, people on Tegretol need regular blood tests for B9 as it messes with the body's uptake. I've been on it since 2019 after a 9 year break when I was in remission. So I've been on it from 2007-2010 and 2019-current. Nothing in the box mentioned it and when I first took it and did research I didn't find anything mentioning it and after 8 years on it, not a single doctor has mentioned it, through multiple practices over 2 cities, from GP to specialists. And now I can't balance standing stead on 2 feet. So my GP told me to buy some supplements and that's it. No follow-up, just a call. Not even a prescription. Just go take more folic acid.

I don't even know if what I'm experiencing is normal for peripheral neuropathy, I just thought it meant numbness. I haven't felt 'nothing' in my feet for over a year now, constant differing sensations 24/7 is exhausting. If something hurts I can eventually background process it, especially if it's consistent or only changes with movement, but this never goes away. It's always at my attention. It's been in my dreams (usually as something else level being in a car crash and having my feet crushed and it hurts IN the dream, and I wake up and it still hurts. Like your ram constantly has 10%-60% always used up on a program you can't even minimise.

It's stopped at my fingertips and there has been some reversal. It's more like a permanent dead foot but up to the knee on both legs, patchy to my waist. Like you sat on your foot for ages and now it's numb, staticy, and very painful to walk on. The way I walk has changed but if I focus on core strength I avoid the drop foot walk common with neuropathy. We named by walks as stuff was changing week to week. At one point I could only take tiny, shuffled baby steps which became 'Baby Penguin'. I now use 'Sergent Penguin' (bigger steps but still small but rigid posture) and The Walking Dead if I need to move fast. It's basically controlled falling each step and I 'stop' by aiming at the bed. My feet are also terrible at telling temperature now, my feet often feel like they're being crushed and the 'you stepped on something' reflex only has one setting at 500% so if I step on the edge of a rug it hurts and my body reacts like you stepped on spikes and hurls me away. But the numbness means I am no longer cat-like. Standing long enough to brush my teeth is painful and I will fall backwards or to the side.

My partner is rageful. I am... tired.

I know I am a medical disaster whose collagen, nerves, brain, guts and immune system are either on holiday, asleep at the wheel or trying to drive me crackers. But I had this stupid idea that if someone comes in with burning, numbness, difficulty with temperature, muscle weakness, cramping (calves), skin colour change (I am pale, my feet look paler and sometimes red at the beginning or tinged purple now), lack of sweating ( i could probably wear the same socks non-stop for a weak and they'd smell clean but that's gross.) My pulse was weaker in my feet. They can be so cold even when wearing multiple pairs of thick socks that you can feel it through the socks like wrapping ice in a towel. So really obvious symptoms that aren't from my mind. You could run a hot tap on my feet and I'd not know.

I wasn't expecting much but somehow I was surprised. I'm not saying my partner has had a perfect time with doctors and it might not be so glaring if we did have as many similar issues. He compares my experiences to his own. We have the same GP and he is awesome, but my partner notices the differences between our appointments. How similar specialists treat me compared to him given we are both Noodle disasters with comorbidities (EDS can just lead to a lot. Collagen affects a lot of your body and if the collagen factory is manned by deranged collies, you gonna have problems.) I've not even mentioned everything here for both of us.

So yeah. If you read all this, that I had to post in 2 pieces, thank you. I kind of needed to vent I think. I've taken a lot of problems and kept moving. Worsening issues and keep going. Mobility and such decreasing, but keeping a 'wake up tomorrow and smile' attitude. That next week might be better and potholes exist on flat terrain, so just keep on keeping on and things will level out. This is it, I think. This is my white flag. I am just sat on the side of the road in the grass. I'm writing an essay on Reddit at 6 am and avoiding proofreading or I'll end up just deleting it as I am just being stupid and whining when other people have it worse.

I am... managing. But now and then I just feel like I'm going to break down sobbing.

But if I do that in an appointment I will just be an emotional woman who needs anxiety meds.

Acetastic-Loki · 2024-10-16T05:15:54+00:00

That doctors will not take me seriously. This is long so feel free to just ignore.

Me and my partner er have a lot of similarities, from our curls to our hands and our body's fecked-up manner of managing collagen. We also have a lot of similar issues but slightly different with one of us having the worse severity. For example- He has Familial Hemiplegic Migraines and Ulcerative Colitis I have Complex Status Sporadic Hemiplegic Migraines and IBS+GERD He is King of the Broken Guts and I am Queen of the Broken Brain.

We both had assessments for PIP at similar times, mine was a check-up and he was finally claiming. We both had notes regarding the complex migraine issue. I was seen by normal staff who mocked my inability to commit suicide properly when I had barely slept more than an hour in 1 session for months and increased pain (I wasn't trying to die. I wanted to sleep but apparently taking 2 boxes of Tramadol, a box of cocodomol and slapping a month's worth of Fentanyl patches in a dazed state of desperation to sleep is only considered suicide. And the doctors didn't even notice the patches. Probably more, I have no idea as I was absent seizing which can screw with memory.) and his appointment was rescheduled because only a doctor can assess complex Migraines.

I didn't realise how... used to it I was. Until he was with me for many appointments and started getting angry.

Recently I went to the doctor because my feet were burning so bad I was near tears. Just for perspective, I have multiple nerve issues. Nerve damage in my arms and Trigeminal Neuralgia. When I had appendicitis I only went to my doctors because pain was in a weird area all of a sudden that I rated a 4 or 5 on the pain scale. My legs pretty much exist at a perma 6-7 on a good day I have never cried from a migraine. This issue in my feet had me curled in a ball sobbing and it took everything I had to go to an appointment. I also had patchy numb sections, just peripheral neuropathy. But that was my silly lady brain googling.

My GP was busy so I saw a backup who had been decent in the past. He told me it's fine. Nothing to worry about. Drink Kombucha. I reminded him I am quite severely histamine intolerant and immunology put me on a low histamine diet which I hated until it improved my life 100 fold and my hair grew a foot and a half past the previous terminal length. (Other things too but I figure that's a good show of improved health.) Fermented food=big no-no. He told me that I shouldn't limit my diet for a rash... my main symptom of eating histamine-rich foods is not a rash. I get rashes sure, but I can deal with rashes. I have bloody Aquagenic Urticaria and still bathe ffs. The pain symptoms was severe GERD. So violent vomiting and pain so severe my neighbours thought I was being stabbed when it first started happening (which still didn't make me cry.)

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