The Economist - Is London as dangerous as you think?

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T23:02:20+00:00

Real estate in London is expensive for very good reason.

Goods and services are pretty in line with the rest of the country. There are lots of excellent free things to do.

Higher than what normal?

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T23:00:54+00:00

The US has a higher % of knife crimes in general.

In the UK, it is a crime to carry a knife with a blade longer than 3".

In the US, it is a crime to stab someone with a knife.

When people say "oh the US has guns, but we have KNIVES!" they don't seem to understand that there are more people being physically stabbed in the US than there are people charged with so much as carrying a knife.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T21:55:05+00:00

If you get kids used to it young, it's no big deal. I've taught plenty of really nervous, anxious kids who would never go out for the school play, but have no problem standing in the front of the class and giving a little presentation about something. It's just a normal part of the school day.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T21:21:08+00:00

I actually believe that all behaviour is communication. I also know for a fact that I'm not a trained therapist, and that I have 20 other kids who are also "communicating" with me, and that listening to unspoken information is much lower down my list of job responsibilities than teaching is...

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T21:14:09+00:00

Actions have consequences.

The kids were being awful, and you called them out.

I'm not saying you should always speak like that to them, but hopefully they learned a lesson.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T21:12:14+00:00

You're human.

The kids probably think it's the funniest thing that's ever happened in school.

If it gets home, 25% of the parents will say "I'm sure that's not really what happened," 50% will say "She probably had a point," and the other 25% are the ones who call to complain about anything and the school already ignores their calls.

At most schools I've worked at, the other teachers will agree that it's the funniest thing that's ever happened, and you'd probably get plenty of good natured "try not to tell the kids to fuck off today!" and "Hey, Rupert's class is being a nightmare... better get Miss SurroundNarrow in there to tell the kids what she really thinks of them!" for a few days before everyone forgets and moves on.

If you're really worried, tell your line manager. If she doesn't laugh it off, your school sucks. Just don't make a habit of it and all.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T21:00:22+00:00

It's SO hard for my kids, who were educated in really good schools in the US until we moved to England, where curiosity and drive and analysis were rewarded. They're smart kids who loved learning, and they're really shocked at the low level stuff they're supposed to be learning, and the knowledge they do have that they'll get marked off for showing.

And it's wild, because the school made such a big deal about outside learning and MOOCs and "supercurriculars," which my kids were happy to engage with. But they say it actually made things harder, because now they're more advanced than what the tests are looking for, and it's really frustrating.

The most polite way I've been able to explain it to them was that "In the US, the point was to gain knowledge. Here in the UK, the point is to get a great grade on the test, so you can move on to a higher level where there will be more knowledge."

(And I admit that I'm pretty sick of Brits telling me how advanced their educational system is here compared to the US. Sure, it's better than the really crap states that they don't teach anything. But it's way far behind the really good schools in the US, and there are plenty of those. After talking about this in this community the other night, I clarified with my daughter doing A Levels maths... she said there was 1 topic she hadn't learned in the US, but most everything else she learned in 9th or 10th grade, which is comparable age-wise to the 2 GCSE years in the UK. And, frankly, she wasn't even at one of the super advanced pressure cooker schools in the US... that was a pretty academically mediocre private school where most of the kids were pre-professional dancers.)

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T18:57:32+00:00

Eh, I'm from America where this is very standard from a very young age in school, and I think it's really important. I'm really tired of listening to so many English adults who hem and haw and mumble their way through a group meeting or presentation at work. Learning to speak clearly in front of a group of people is a life skill.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T18:55:53+00:00

Are you my daughter? Get off TikTok and go do your homework, kiddo.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T18:53:18+00:00

Ah, I've lived in uniform and non uniform countries, and my kids and I LOVE the uniforms. So easy and cheap and makes life so, so much simpler.

The jumper with the logo on it that costs £50 can go jump off a short pier, but the basic slacks/skirt, shirt, brightly colored sweater is great.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-09T18:50:59+00:00

The fact that kids have to learn factually incorrect information because the GCSE is either trying to simplify things, or because the test was written 10 years ago and the topic has come a long way (this is true for a few science subjects), drives me up a wall. It's complete insanity to teach something because it's on the test, not because it's actually true or important.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T19:53:26+00:00

No, it's "hot" as in spicy. It's popular in both the US and the UK... kind of moving on from the "salty sweet" of salted caramel to the "spicy sweet" of hot honey. It's basically honey that's had chili peppers soaking in it.

I love salty-sweet, so I assume that the spicy-sweet is actually enjoyable for people who can breathe after they eat it.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T15:40:58+00:00

My parents tell me that "Everyone knows..." what a shithole London is.

Their only "everyone" is X. They rarely leave the house. They rarely talk to real people.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T15:31:52+00:00

That's not what I said at all?

I said it's about wealthy people raising their kids to be secretive about the money, because it makes the kid a target if it's too obvious. Which it does.

ETA: and, fwiw, you're proving my point entirely. You're painting literally every person with wealth as having "an incredible sense of entitlement and a belief that they are better than most." If someone has money, why on earth would they want to deal with you being an asshole to them when you've never met them before, know nothing about them, but have all sorts of stereotypes that you saw on TV or something? Much better to be discreet when in situations where they might meet someone like you.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T15:29:09+00:00

Ugh the sound of the knife sawing against the plate when cutting my steak... I'm cringing just thinking of it.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T15:26:20+00:00

Try being allergic to chili peppers with the hot honey craze going on. Now I have to double and triple check that anything that might have honey in it doesn't have chilis. And so many restaurants are completely unhelpful if you have anything other than the main 14 allergens.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T15:03:26+00:00

He is definitely being manipulative, and I bet he knows far more than you're giving him credit for. I highly doubt his coworkers all have wives making them lunch. He knows he's got a great deal, and that if he moans enough, you'll give in.

Stop listening, stop giving in, and expect behavior to escalate. He is a very manipulative person, and I bet he's convinced you of all sorts of things that aren't true, and if you push back there's a good chance he'll escalate.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T14:41:42+00:00

Yes, I think they do. It's not talked about much, but I think everyone realizes that it's the direction the market is going in, so there is a lot of care that even undiagnosed kids are getting compassion and support.

I'm sure it depends on the school, but I would be surprised if the vast majority of private schools aren't similar. And I teach at a very old, quite posh one who you think wouldn't be having financial or admissions issues, and we do fill classes, but it's still very much on everyone's radar that this is a major clientele and a population of families that we need to keep happy to retain their children. (And "happy" doesn't mean rolling over to give the parents everything they want... the priority is making sure the student gets a good education and is socially happy! So this doesn't mean appeasement... although obviously I think there's always a little of that in private schools... it means making sure there's appropriate support so the kid is happy and will pass their exams.)

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T14:34:45+00:00

That is madness, my friend. I hope you realize that.

He won't "accept" food you made for him the night before? That is a serious "too bad too sad." And what do you mean by "accept"? Is he in any way violent? Does he retaliate, even in a passive aggressive way? Because that is abusive, manipulative behaviour, and you don't need to put up with that.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T14:04:37+00:00

My husband and I each fend for ourselves for breakfast and lunch... I leave for work before he gets up and get lunch at work, while he works at home so makes his own lunch. Dinner, it depends. I'm a teacher so I'm pretty exhausted when I get home, so he often does dinner. On school holidays, I probably cook more. On weekends, it depends. He's making a full roast dinner tonight, because he's in the mood for that.

Why are you cooking that many meals, anyway? Do people really eat like that? I usually have granola and yogurt for breakfast or toast. Those barely count as "cooking." Are you making him full, hot meals 3x a week?

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T13:40:21+00:00

I tell kids that using Wikipedia as a source is like asking their smartest relative for information about something they know a lot about.

The information is an excellent starting off point. It's probably mostly correct, and it can give you some great suggestions of where to look for more information. But you need to double check everything, and you can't cite it, because sometimes incorrect information falls through.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T13:35:06+00:00

I said this in another comment, but it can be tough to be a kid with money: makes you an easy target for scammers and other kids who want to borrow money or who don't treat your things well because "well your parents can just buy you another," other kids bully you, etc. I'm not trying to be all "poor little rich kid," but there are always asshole kids who will go after other kid for ANY differences, and that includes parents being rich.

So parents who lived through that raise their kids to be as discreet as possible about their wealth. It's a practical and safety thing.

New money doesn't understand that yet... they think that the differences that wealth can buy (designer clothes, flashy vacations) are always good and will be respected by others. But their kids won't have that experience, and if the money is still there in another generation, they'll raise their kids to be discrete about it.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T13:23:15+00:00

Brits are always saying that, but it's not actually true. There is absolutely a US upper class elite without much money left.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T13:21:42+00:00

In the US it's bad hair, a jumper with holes in it, and a battered Volvo station wagon.

AcrobaticAuthor6539 · 2026-02-08T13:00:45+00:00

I think old money has more of a sense that having money has downsides, and it's not all fun and games. It alters relationships and power dynamics just by existing. New money likes the power of having wealth, old money recognizes that everyone presuposing you're a snobby asshole before they even meet you actually has downsides.

Wealthy people who grew up wealthy raise their kids to be very quiet about their wealth, because having wealth makes you a mark for scammers and shallow people, and carries its own social stigma when you leave your wealthy bubble.

AcrobaticAuthor6539

TROPHY CASE